Final Interview

“Welcome, Mr. Thomas.”

“Call me Henry.”

“Of course. I’m Natalie Bishop, and this interview will be the final stage of your application with MI5. If all goes well, I will be able to offer you a position as an agent handler today. Please sit down.”

“Thanks. Lovely to meet you. Sorry, I’m a little early.”

“Not at all, better that way. Help yourself to water at any time. Did you come on the tube?”

“No. Walked over. We’re not far from my flat.”

“It’s Camden, isn’t it? Lived there long?”

“Yes, and no. Yes, I live in Camden. No, only for the last three months. I rented the place while working through this process. I’m sure you know that already.”

“Yes. It says here, you were in Norwich before that?”

“Yeah. Family home. Never moved far, not even for work. Is that an iPad or knock-off?”

“This device is not important. You worked for Informed Metrics for how long?”

“Nine years, thereabouts.”

“Enjoy it?”

“Absolutely. Great company. Chap I met there ended up marrying one of my sisters. I can’t smoke in here, can I?”

“No. Was it the people or the work you liked more?”

“Both. I like to get on with those I work with. Sure I can’t smoke? It’s only a vape.”

“Quite sure. Do you think liking people would be important in this role? Does it matter?”

“I would think it’s even more important here. If we can’t get on with, or trust, the people we work with, how on earth will we protect the country?”

“Which would matter more? The people or the country?”

“Didn’t realise I had to choose?”

“For the sake of today, you do.”

“Then I choose the people.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. The country can survive a few bumps in the road.”

“As the selection process must have shown you, the role of handler can occasionally result in having to choose between the welfare of a single person and the lives of others.”

“There’s always a third option.”

“Really? In my experience, one has to choose a path rather than cut a new one. From your experience in the commercial data-mining sector, could you explain this third option?”

“I’d need an example.”

“Why?”

“Every situation is different. The third option is, by its nature, created on the spot — with a few exceptions.”

“OK. Your agent has information that protects the identities of innocent witnesses. During an operation, your agent is captured by those wanting that information. The agent will likely be forced to provide the information. You have the opportunity to execute the agent before that happens. What is the third option here?”

“Shoot the agent with a strong tranquiliser.”

“That was a quick response?”

“First thing came to mind. You have a great view from this office. Do you ever watch people in the flats across the street?”

“What? No! Please can we concentrate? I will allow enough time for the tranquiliser, but the agent will still be taken captive.”

“Fair enough. Now we have time.”

“To..?”

“Many options. We could have hours. In that time, I’m sure we would find a way to rescue the agent or prolong the interrogation further.”

“Let’s say you don’t get the tranquiliser. Your agent is walking along the road, a van pulls up, and they’re gone.”

“Not gonna happen.”

“You seem confident in that.”

“I am.”

“How so?”

“If I’m watching my agent, they’re on a mission, so we would be prepared. No reason for me to just be watching them randomly. If we’re watching, we’re in control. Your clock is slow.”

“Clock?”

“Yeah. The one behind you. It’s slow.”

“No, it’s not.”

“Sure?”

“Yes.”

“OK. My mistake. On you go. Something about my agent and a van?”

“Yes. Right. You mentioned being in control. Do you need control?”

“In this example, or me, generally?”

“Yes.”

“Well, since this is an interview, I can admit to being most comfortable in control. I like my routines. Same meals, same clothes.”

“What do these routines give you?”

“Time.”

“Time?”

“Yes. The most precious thing in all the world. More than money, I am careful how I spend my time. If you treat every moment as expensive, a luxury, you are much more likely to spend it wisely.”

“And the routines?”

“Having the same thing for breakfast and lunch means I get minutes every day back from deciding. I also get time back during grocery shopping and food prep.”

“What’s for dinner this evening.”

“Chilli, with a jacket potato. I put the potato in the oven before I left this morning. It will magically start cooking an hour before I arrive home. I made the chilli in a large batch over the weekend. Out of the freezer, into a pot. Twenty minutes after arriving home, I will be eating.”

“Sounds boring.”

“I like chilli. Otherwise, I wouldn’t eat it.”

“Isn’t preparing a meal part of the enjoyment of the meal?”

“I eat alone. I also like to plan.”

“Why are you alone?”

“Not met my soulmate yet.”

“Interesting.”

“What is? The fact that I’m alone?”

“No. That you called a partner your ‘soulmate’.”

“Yeah. I’m not into casual relationships.”

“Some of those relationships raise concern.”

“Such as?”

“Claire Price-Wood.”

“Ah, lovely Claire. She’s fine. I assume you don’t like her father?”

“You know of Elijah Price-Wood? Have you met?”

“So many questions.”

“It is an interview.”

“Fair point. I’m allowed some of my own, though, right?”

“Price-Wood?”

“OK. I met him twice. Once when Claire invited me to some charity thing. Again, when he came to the office to collect his daughter. I say collect when I mean he sat in his car, and Claire got in it. Who’s the other?”

“I haven’t finished asking about Mr. Price-Wood.”

“I’ve finished answering.”

“Steven—”

“Miller. Yes, I bet I know why you’re worried about Steven.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. In my defence, I didn’t know he was so connected.”

“Have you been to his brother’s hotel?”

“Yes. That was when I found out who his brother was.”

“No contact since?”

“No. I don’t need that stress in my life.”

“Speaking of brothers.”

“Ah. Here it comes.”

“You have one brother and—”

“Three sisters. Yes. The girls are great. The twins are researchers at the same pharmaceutical company in Nottingham. Abigail is in the US, doing who knows what in a campervan.”

“Then there is Lucas.”

“Yeah. Every family has a Lucas.”

“Do they?”

“Yes. Even yours.”

“I’m sorry?”

“You have a Lucas.”

“I do not. We are here to—”

“Your sister, Isabella.”

“How do you know my sister?”

“Is it not good practice to do some research before an interview?”

“Yes. Always. But how did you know I would—”

“Be interviewing me? Well, I’m really good at that data-mining thing you mentioned earlier. I like your choice of blouse. It’s formal, yet distracting.”

“I am not the subject of today. Your brother, Lucas, is currently behind bars.”

“Yes — this water is too cold — he killed a delivery man. No chance of a cup of tea, is there?”

“No. You don’t seem concerned about your brother’s background.”

“You’re not interviewing my brother.”

“But family has a bearing on your suitability.”

“No. It doesn’t. If it did, you wouldn’t be sitting there with a sister awaiting trial for embezzlement in Italy.”

“My sister is innocent — not that it is any of your business.”

“Of course.”

“Your brother is guilty.”

“Absolutely. He definitely killed that chap. No chance of a cuppa?”

“No. Mr. Thomas, you do not seem focused on this interview. I would have thought, after the long selection process, that you would want a good outcome today.”

“Oh, I already know the outcome of today. What is this?”

“Please put that down. How can you possibly know how today will go?”

“What is this, anyway? Some sort of executive toy?”

“If you do not take this interview seriously, I can bring it to an end, and your application will be terminated.”

“That sounds terrible. I don’t think you’ll do that, though.”

“Why not? So far, I have seen nothing that makes you a suitable candidate for handling any of our agents out in the world.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

“Thing is, I have proven that I am relaxed in a stressful situation. I have answered a hypothetical question swiftly and with some style. I proved that I prepared thoroughly for this meeting, even to the extent of knowing personal secrets of my interviewer.”

“I don’t think knowing about my sister is that personal.”

“Knowing your friends is, though.”

“My friends?”

“Is there a button you press, or does it just sit there and look expensive?”

“Put it down! Please. What do you mean, my friends?”

“Evelyn, Grace, Zoe, and Harper.”

“I…what? Who are they?”

“You covered that well, I’m impressed.”

“I don’t know what you are talking about.”

“These are friends of yours, yes?”

“No. I also don’t see how my fri—”

“They must be your friends. It’s the only way you could be in the same place as all four of them. They all checked in to the same hotels as you. At exactly the same time. Strange thing is, we don’t know what they look like.”

“I think we should end this interview. I don’t like the tone you are taking.”

“I bet. Sadly, I think this interview should continue for a few moments longer.”

“I’m going to have to ask you to leave. If you refuse to do so, I will have to call security.”

“No need for that.”

“So you will leave?”

“No. You see, from your point of view, I have two options: Get the job or not get the job. Unfortunately, I always like a third option. Boys!”

“What are you—”

“These three men are here to take you to a new interview.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Sure you do, Natalie — or should I say, Naomi? Yeah, I thought you might clam up after that.”

“Please. I can explain.”

“You will be given plenty of time to explain. I’m pleased to tell you that you have progressed to the next stage of the process.”