Romance Drama Funny

This story contains themes or mentions of physical violence, gore, or abuse.

***Tw: implied: non-graphic, past abuse/abusive relationship, recent: non-graphic attacking someone,

Other tw; swearing, Inappropriate Humor and out of place sarcasm, name calling, having scars from a previous abusive relationship. This story goes back in forth between heavy subjects and sarcasm. it's supposed to be funny while adressing touch subjects, it's not supposed to justify abuse.***

“Speak now”, Matthew demanded.

“Chill out, do you not realize I could have called someone else to bail me out of jail?” Jonah asked, completely unbothered, while getting in to Matthew's car.

“Then why didn't you?” Matthew asked while slamming the car door shut, still as pissed off as ever.

“Because I knew you'd pick up the phone, I knew you'd yell at me, but I also knew that you would drop everything to come get my ass and let's be for real; you're the only one of my friends that can afford to bail me out”, Jonah admitted.

“You didn't call me because I'm your boyfriend?” Matthew asked, still bitter.

“Oh right, there is also that”, Jonah teased.

“Jonah, I'm not in the mood for jokes, just tell me what you did”, Matthew demanded impatiently.

“Okay, don't be mad… But-"

Matthew cut him off.

“I just bailed you out of jail, we're past that already.”

Jonah sighed.

“Okay fine. So, I saw Eddie and-”

Matthew looked at him with wide eyes and gasped. “You killed him?”

Jonah started laughing, “no of course not, common you genius, you do realize that they wouldn't release me with a little bail money, if I killed the guy, right?”

Matthew rolled his eyes at him. “A little? You call that a little bit of money?”

“Don't worry, I'll pay you back every penny”, Jonah promised.

“I'm not even concerned about that, just tell me what you did', Matthew demanded again.

Jonah awkwardly fixed his hair. “Nothing really”, he tried.

Matthew gave him an is this man for real look.

“Oh right, they arrested you for doing nothing”, Matthew replied sarcastically.

“Maybe they arrested me for my dangerous good looks?” Jonah joked.

Matthew glared at him.

“Jonah, speak… now, or someone is going to have to bail me out of jail too.”

“Awww, Matty, did you just threaten me? How adorable, unfortunately for you, you're so tiny, it's simply not intimidating, but it was cute though', Jonah joked.

“Shut up, I'm not short, I'm 5'8! In fact, I'm taller than you!” Matthew bit back defensive.

“Yet who wears the pants in this relationship?” Jonah teased, still completely unbothered.

“There is not going to be a relationship for much longer, if you don't tell me what happened, right now!” Matthew threatened.

“Okay, okay, chill out babe, so much stress is bad for your heart”, Jonah said while jokingly putting his hand on Matthew's chest.

Matthew rolled his eyes at him again.

“I'm a 20-year-old guy, my heart is fine.”

“Yeah, but if you're going to spend the rest of your life with me, this will not be the last time I almost give you a heart attack”, Jonah joked, yet again..

“You don't think I know that? Now tell me what you did!” Matthew all but yelled.

“Okay fine, so I was just walking, minding my business, when all of a sudden I saw that piece of trash of an ex-boyfriend of yours. And he did something that really pissed me off and-”.

“What did he do?” Matthew asked, somewhat concerned.

“He was… you know, breathing, but that's really not the point. The point is-".

Matthew facepalmed.

“You tried to kill a guy because he was breathing?”

“I didn't try to kill him, but after everything he did to you, I should have”, Jonah bit back defensive.

“If you didn't try to kill him, then why did i have to bail you out of jail?"Matthew asked confused.

“Okay, fine, maybe I tried to kill him a little bit," Jonah admitted.

“Excuse me?” 

“I just tackled him and punched him in the face, the dramatic asshole immediately had a nose bleed, and then a cop showed up, yanked me off of him and put handcuffs on me.”

“You punched him once? That doesn't sound that bad. I mean I don't encourage that kind of behavior obviously-”.

Jonah cut him off. “Says the martial artist.”

“I'm skilled in martial arts, so I can defend myself, not hurt an innocent civilian”, Matthew reminded him.

Jonah was tempted to make a comment about how he didn't defend himself to Eddie at all, but he didn't, it wasn't his place to do so. Matthew has told him before that he didn't fight back, because he didn't want to hurt him.

The idea alone is enough to make Jonah sick, the fact that Matthew was perfectly capable of hurting Eddie back or atleast defending himself, but he didn't, because he could never hurt someone he loves.

Just thinking about that made Jonah angry all over again.

“Innocent? Come on, Matt after what he did to you? Do I need to take off your shirt and show you the scars on your chest that that asshole gave you?”

Matthew smacked his boyfriend's hand away.

“No, you may not take off my shirt in the parking place in front of the police station, and I'm not saying what he did was right. I'm saying that you attacked him without needing to do so to defend yourself. You weren't in danger; therefore you had no reason to attack him.”

“I was defending you!” Jonah yelled.

Matthew put a hand on his knee.

“I know and i appreciate the thought behind it, but it's been litteral years. You didn't need to punch him out of the blew, besides by attacking him you're only lowering yourself on to his level. You're better then that."

Jonah shrugged. "If i'd run in to him sooner, i'd done it sooner. I know violence is never the answer, i just can't stand the idea that he got away complety unharmed after everything he put you through. I mean his nose has probably already stopped bleeding at this point, but your scars are permanent."

Matthew cleared his throat.

I don't understand why you were arrested, though? For one punch in the face?”

“I'm saying", Jonah agreed.

Matthew squinted his eyes at him suspiciously.

“There is something you're not telling me, isn't there?”


“You mean maybe? Or perhaps?” Matthew asked annoyed.

Jonah awkwardly chuckled.

“Okay, so I may have jokingly told the police officer that I was In to that when he threatened to put handcuffs on me.”

“You did not!” Matthew yelled.

“I was just trying to break the tension!” Jonah defended himself, while chuckling lightly.

“The tension that you caused?” Matthew reminded him..

“Someone had to put that boyfriend beater in his place, I did what you should have done ages ago. You know what they say, karma is only a bitch if you are.”

“You do realize that that means you should have let karma take care of it, right?” Matthew asked, still slightly irritated.

“Well, I got tired of waiting on the bitch to do her job”, Jonah answered casually.

“I hate you”, Matthew stated.

“No, you don't, you love me”, Jonah replied teasingly while dramatically batting his eyelashes at him.

Matthew sighed. “I know, it sucks.”

Jonah rolled his eyes at him and then gently put Matthew's hand on the steering wheel.

“Just drive away, would you? I want to tell your brothers what I did to the nose of that ex-boyfriend of yours”.

“I should have left you in jail”, Matthew joked halfheartedly.

“You know, you really should have, I felt a lot saver in jail”, Jonah joked back.

Matthew rolled his eyes at his boyfriend, again.

“I would never hurt you, but did you really need to do what you did?”

Jonah nodded dramatically.

“I absolutely did. Now get over yourself and drive us home. Oh, and can we stop for some coffee to go? Punching a guy and going to jail really is a lot more exhausting than the movies make it out to be.”

March 20, 2023 21:22

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