T.B.D

Ashley Barns, 10th grade

Have you ever had that one friend who was indecisive, picky, and confused? The one that was always busy but not because they needed to but because they had the urge the need to be moving all the time doing lots of different things miserable doing so? I have and because of it, the friendship I had with my best friend Kathy was almost destroyed. Hi, My name is Ashley Barns I am in the 10th grade and when I was in the 9th grade my best friend Kathy was so busy picking up and dropping school clubs and neighborhood hobbies that she got distant from me and her own family, This is the story on how being indecisive doesn't just affect you but the people who care about you as well.

Kathy rosewood, 9th grade

I hear my parents screaming again I am just trying to keep my brothers distracted but there is only so much you can do when they are two feet away; I tell my brothers to get their shoes on and some food for the night along with the camping gear they are quiet as I sneak them out the living room to the back door. When all my brothers are all out, and I quietly close the door, I tell them to be quiet as we walk around the house to the garage. I am reticent as I gather some money my brothers and I have hidden for times like these, and though it's not like my parents would hear us over all their screaming, I told my brothers to be silent as we left the garage. Sometimes I wish that I could escape my parents arguing altogether but it's not as easy seeing as though I am not in any school clubs if I was in school clubs or took up some new hobbies I would only have to face my parents at dinner and on the weekends where if I joined a sports team there would be no games. I wish my brothers didn't have to do this every other day and I wish my parents would stop fighting for a few seconds to see that my brothers are hurting and that I am starting to crack. I have these fantasies at night about my parents smiling at each other and my brothers being kids and having fun and me not having to worry about where my brothers and I will go the minute a fight breaks out between my parents and we can't handle it anymore, but it's always interrupted by my brain telling me that my fantasies are fantasies because will never come true. My parents are good at pretending because that's all they do in front of everyone including my best friend's parents but I've always wanted to tell her about my parents and their ways and sometimes I get angry and want to scream at her for not seeing past their act but It's not her fault it's mine for not telling her everything when it began. School starts in 2 weeks and for now everything in T.B.D

Ashley barns, 9th grade

School started 3 weeks ago but it feels like I haven't seen Kathy in ages, she started the fall sports and took up an interest in art but I would bet that she would be changing at least 5 of the ten things she is doing and switching to something else on 2 hours 1 day tops; that's all she's been doing lately joining a club quitting the club, Finds a new interest then drops that interest And the avoid me all in a simple dance. I don't think I've done anything wrong I mean it's not like I have been near Kathy to do something mean but maybe if I join the clubs she's in even if it's just before she quits them I could figure out what's wrong with her and what I did wrong.

Kathy rosewood, 9th grade

I miss Ashley, but I feel like if get close with her again she'd find out about my secret about my parents and she'd stop seeing me as her best friend and more as some girl whose parents can't seem to stop fighting. Ashley has been trying to talk to me the minute I started avoiding her I know that I'm hurting her and that she misses me and I feel really bad about it but maybe if I hold out a little longer she'll give up and that she'll hate me and not care about me anymore to find out the truth. I joined lot's of clubs to escape my parents and their fighting, but I can't get close with the people in the clubs or they will want to come over and then my secret will be known, this is why the minute I start to feel close with anybody I have to leave the club, and it's the same with the hobbies I've taken up; when someone starts to get to interested in why I like the hobbies I've chosen and if I have done something similar in the past I tense up wondering if they are trying to get at my secrets and I put up a force field and quit that hobby wondering if I will get a chance at friendship again. It feels like everything in my life right now is to be determined and I don't know how much more of it I can take.

Ashley Barns, 9th grade

I joined all the clubs that Kathy was in just in case she dropped out of one I would still be able to see her in another, My plan was to get her to talk to me because I missed her and I could tell she was hiding something big and I want to be able to help her if I ever get the chance. I know she is hiding something because we've been friends since kindergarten and she and I were inseparable and we always had each other's backs and now it's like she wants to erase our whole friendship and that is not her and I was going to find out what was wrong. Later today I told my parents that I was going to Kathy's house for a sleepover so when they dropped me off at her house I acted like I was walking up to their driveway and waited for them to leave than when they did I went to their garage; Their garage door was broken during summer vacation, and they never got it fixed so I quietly opened the garage door, walked in and closed it and then I set up a sleeping bag and a listening device and waited because I knew something big was about to happen

Kathy rosewood, 9th grade

Dad came home that night drunk; apparently, he lost his job and was even more stressed about the fighting going on with mom of course mom started yelling at him on how if he lost his job he shouldn't be spending it on wasteless things like alcohol and she had a point. For the past 5 years I have listened to my parents argue forgetting about my brothers and me, we ran away, I joined and it clubs and hobbies isolating myself from people I care About but not anymore my parents will listen and they will understand the pain they caused my brothers. I yell hey but I have to say it twice before they even hear me; My parents look at me and I didn't know how angry I was until I finally have their attention, and I go off on them telling them that they are acting like children and at this point should have gotten a divorce 4 years ago after the first year of the fighting and the yelling and the late nights of eyes burning with hatred; I told them how tired I was of having to remove my brothers from the situation because they didn't think about how all of this was affecting us I told them everything; But then my dad did the unspeakable he picked me up and held me chocking me in the process and told me to shut up my mom just stood there as I was gasping for breath and was about to go unconscious when someone busted in our house and grabbed my dad's arm. It was Ashley!

Ashley Barns, 9th grade

When I was in their garage I heard screaming so I went to the side of their house and looked through the window; I saw Kathy through the window yelling at her parents for something and then I saw Kathy's dad grab her and choke her against the wall while her mom stood there doing nothing and her brothers In another room shaking with fear, I called the police then ran into the house grabbing Mr.rosewood and pulling his arm protecting Kathy from him and everything else was a blur.

Kathy rosewood, 9th grade

After the police came everything was moving fast but at the same time too slow, The police questioned Ashley on what happened and then questioned my brothers and myself. My father was arrested for abuse and child endangerment and my mother was arrested for sitting by and letting my father choke me to the point of unconsciousness. My brothers were taken to my aunt's house and the barns let me stay with them while my aunt tried to make room for me and get everything adjusted to our liking; while I stayed at the barns Ashley told me why she was at my house and how she knew to be there.

Ashley Barns, 10th grade

Kathy lives with me now but occasionally she says at her aunt's house with her brothers she also explained to me why she was going in and out of clubs and hobbies & how she didn't want to be pitted and so after we cried a little we had fun, now we are better than ever and our feelings about last year are no longer T.B.D but It's okay if that's how we feel as long as we remember to be determined together.

But this isn't the end of our story just the beginning.