THE PATH NOT TAKEN

I am 48 years old meaning it's been 26 years now . It's indeed funny how time flies before you like lightning. I stared longingly at the medals and trophies lined up neatly on the shelf and awards on the glass display cabinet,the ones that I had won over the past years during my athletics day . I used to be an athlete, a runner precisely who toured the universe, representing and doing my country proud, bringing back home trophies and medals ranging from gold to silver and of course to bronze. As a young child,I had always dreamed of glory and achieved that in my early years of life but two things I came to realize was that life was too short and you have absolutely no control who lives,who dies and who tells your story.

That dream soon came to an abrupt stop when I got married to my husband quite early who passed away several years ago. By then, we'd already had three kids together. I was suddenly in a position where I felt like I needed to choose between my family and my career. It was dilemma enough as the decision meant me giving up my dreams,my passion, everything I ever dreamed of as a child. The reason that made me get up in the morning with great anticipation and enthusiasm. But my children needed a mother and not a celebrity. They needed love not fame and they were so very small and tender when their father passed away. I needed to be there for them,to be both a mother and a father to them . My career on the other hand was almost all I knew. It had shared eventually all my emotions with me, my tears, my sadness, my happiness, my anger, my pain,my,sweat,my ecstasy, hell,even my victory dance. it was my escape,it was more oxygen than career to me . It was definitely not easy giving up a career as successful as mine,a career that brought me to the limelight at such early age when I was a nobody but I had to choose. I had to make a choice and a real quick one at that...It was a choose to lose situation and so.....................I chose my family.

I know what you're thinking and yes,it wasn't easy but it was worth it. Family comes first and I was willing to give up my career for the sake of my children but it never meant I didn't miss my career. If anything, I yearned desperately for it but there was that gap that I just couldn't seem to bridge. I yearned so much for it, I cried when I thought about it sometimes. It felt like there was this hole, this vacuum in my heart that could never be filled. My career was so short but so meaniful and motivating. It was a big shock to all when I resigned,they assumed I'd still make an amazing comeback but my mind was already made up. My kids. I loved my career but.... And do not get me wrong, I enjoyed raising my children. It was one of the best things that happened to me. I don't regret giving up my career for them,I just wished there was some way I could balance the two but apparently that was impossible. I definitely had to give one competing party more attention than the other and you see, that was the problem, they shouldn't even have to compete .

I traced the trophies with my delicate finger, each touch taking me down memory lane, springing up forgotten memories. A small smile slowly formed on the corner of my lips. Oh,God, I miss this. I miss running,I miss training,I miss winning trophies.

"You know, you never told us how you got that one" My youngest daughter said,her arms folded against her chest, her head leaned on the wall, her voice causing me to jerk.

I placed a hand on my chest in relief.

"Melanie, I thought you better than sneaking up on people like that. My heart isn't as strong as it was,you know. How long have you been standing there" ? I asked

"Long enough to notice you travel through reverie"

"It was so long ago but it feels like it happened just yesterday" I sighed "I went for a competition despite some complications"

"What kind of complication" ? She asked.

"I had a strained ankle that day. It took every ounce in me to not give up. You can't imagine how hard it was running with a strained ankle but I didn't know how much worse my partner was doing. I was complaining about about a strained ankle while she was struggling with something even worse. I didn't win that race. She did,but getting to the finish line,she slumped causing confusion and choas and I crossed immediately after she did along with other racers. The paramedics quickly rushed and carterd her off the track. It was traumatic and hard to process. I was crowned first place in her stead but it didn't feel right. The next day when I woke up, I heard in the news that she passed away shortly after she was taken to the hospital. I was numb and shocked to my bones. I saw her just the day before. She had told me my shoelace were coming off. We ran the track together and just on the finishing line,in the middle of victory,she slumped, see the thing with runners is whenever they fall,they get back up again on their feet but she.....she was never going to run again. Never to see again, to touch, to feel. It made me realize how short life was and how I had so much to be grateful for. I heard she had a kid and she was a divorcee. That felt really sad and for some odd reason, I felt a little bit of guilt"

"Mom, she didn't die because of you. She died due to some complications or whatever who knows, but I don't find that a natural death but one thing I know is that she died doing what she loved and that's what matters" Melanie said and

"You're right" I smiled and sighed.

"You miss running, don't you" ? Melanie asked "You kept every paper stack, every newspaper and magazine you featured in"

"More than I show it" I replied "I guess it was my path not taken. For me it wasn't just a career. It was my own way of expressing myself and of course rendering service to my country. I had so much fun doing it. It was part of me,it's like the blood that flows through my veins"

"If it makes you feel any better, we're glad you made that decision. I mean while growing up, it was fun to say our mom was famous.She used to be on the news, she shook hands with the president one time and you should see her collection of trophies and medals,it is priceless. But you were right,We had a mother and that's what we needed. Growing up would have never been the same without you in the picture . I mean,look at the product built out of your choice. Three amazingly beautiful and successful children. We have you to thank for that. Besides,Cora is taking after you. It's what made you guys so close" (Cora,was my what child and daughter) "She's sport inclined and doing very well for herself in the athlete industry. It's painful to watch her live your dream but it's beautiful too you have to admit"

"Thank you very much. I appreciate. You're definitely right. I have three beautiful children and they mean the world to me"

"You know, you're not that old. It's never too late to go back" She teased and we both laughed.

"That sounds intriguing but..... Unfortunately , I grew a couple of grey hair,( exaggerating) my legs aren't what they used to be back in the days. I've added age and weight since that period because,God help me, I've not been dieting.I know I still look sweet sixteen, thanks for the indirect compliment, I'd continuing going on and on now . I've forgotten what it's like to be on the track or to run a lap. I guess what I'm trying to say in essence is that the fact is I am old" I smiled warily.

We both laughed.

"Mhm,I wonder if...." Melanie trailed off.

"That thing that you do that you start off a sentence and never complete it, trailing off to heaven knows where,keeping me in suspense It's totally uncool, now, wonder what " ?

She smiled and shook her head.

"Never mind"

"Ugh"

*

Three weeks later , I got a call from Melanie asking me to meet her at the texted address which I found a bit absurd. It was down town and I had never visited there before. When I got there. I was only excited because, I'd been having an eerie feeling the last three weeks,like I was being followed or something. They all came to meet me at the gate and by "we" I meant my three children. Cora,Bryan and Melanie.

"Okay, what exactly is this all about" ?

"What do you mean" ? Brian smirked "Can't your children call you just to hang out with you" ?

"Okay,we all know you guys don't consider me that much fun so just cut the crap already and go straight to the point" I smiled. "What are you mischievous three up to this time"

"Good morning to you too" Cora smiled sarcastically.

"You guys are just getting me all nervous and anxious. You know how much I hate suspense. Come on, don't do this"

"Okay. Since I'm the whole masterminder of the whole thing" Melanie began.

"That much I figured" I muttered

"I might as well just let the cat out of the bag. So,we saw how much your career meant and obviously still means to you. We understand we were part the reason behind that decision and we wanted to appreciate you in our own little way . So we decided to open a business for you and named it after you Keesha's Training Centre. You could come up with a better name if you please, that was the only thing we could come up with. You have been given an opportunity to train upcoming and future athletes and you know... Whatever it is you've yearned for your whole life. There's a gym in it. A little museum designed just in your honour where I've gathered all your trophies and medals and replaced them with replicas-"

So that's why I've been having an eerie feeling these past weeks, you've been sneaking around my apartment, you little tresspasser

"The newspaper stacks are included and of course every single magazine you featured in which were in the basement collecting dust. Also, your jerseys and sneakers and the little prizes you won as a child,so they can speak to people and be an inspiration to them . All in all,you need to tell your own story"

I wiped the tears trailing down my cheeks. How on earth did they come together and think about such idea. Bryan opened the gate to reveal a large,well furnished building that was even better on the inside. I clasped my mouth with my hands when I saw our relatives, family,friends. Waiting outside at the entrance.

"Thanks mom....for being there. I mean it" Cora smiled.

"Thank you too. I really don't know what we could have done without you. You've singlehandedly raised us and groomed us and I couldn't be more grateful. So, thank you" Bryan chipped in.

Everyone suddenly started clapping as we headed towards the ribbon for our launching.

"Would you do us the honour of cutting the ribbon" ? Melanie asked.

I nodded, still dabbing the stray tears that streamed down my cheeks. I was so emotional They handed over the scissors to me and after we spelled K-e-e-s-h-a. I cut the ribbon. There were cheerings and clapping. Everyone congratulating me.

We all walked inside to take a look. It was your typical exquisite luxury setting,seeing it begged attention. It was perfect. Everything about it screamed exquisite. There were waiters,serving drinks as we took a tour in the building. I smiled. This wasn't running,this wasn't going back on the tracks. This wasn't any of that but it was definitely something. It was definitely thrilling and intriguing.

I had the opportunity to impact the lives of others. To pass the mantle to others. To inspire people,to motivate people. To me, that was beautiful . It was an honor and I was blessed. My children didn't evilly pay me back.

I still miss running though....

Cora nudged my elbow.

"Hopefully, you'd employ me as your manager. We'd get to spend more quality time together" She teased.

"Maybe, just maybe"

........ But in the end, it was worth it.

THE END.