Disengage

That did not just happen, did it? He came out of nowhere! Out of the dark, I didn't- I'm sorry. I didn't see him, he was moving too fast, and I- I didn't move us out of the way in time.

Oh, no. This can't be happening. Please, no.

Don't let this be real. I'm just dreaming. This is only a dream. I've dreamt of this kind of thing multiple times. This can't be real.

Let's... Ok, let's take a deep breath. Take stock. Keep going.

So. Denying that it happened won't change the fact that it... it happened. It did happen, but you're OK. You are OK. I'm still hoping that this is just a dream, and any moment now, I'm going to wake up, but even if it's a dream, we still need to take care of what needs to be taken care of, don't we?

Anyway, you're going to be fine.

You're fine.

We'll be just FINE. I've got you. You're going to be OK. I'll take care of everything. You don't need to worry about a thing.

Yeah, I know, it does look bad, but still, it could have been worse. It's not as bad as it looks to begin with anyway, so... We'll just get you to... They'll fix you right up, and we'll be right as rain and on the road again, no problem.

They've told me it's not my fault. Not yours either, of course, but I still can't help but feel like I could have done something else, something more. We could have... taken a different route, perhaps. Maybe left the house a little earlier.

Or maybe we could have just not left home at all.

If we hadn't decided to go anywhere, we wouldn't have been out on that road at that time of night, and... This wouldn't have happened.

I know it's not my fault, and I know "what if"s are pointless.

... I swear I'm going to learn how to shoot a gun, I'm going to buy one, and I'm going to hunt him down.

All right, fine, maybe I won't actually do it, but I still very much want to.

No, don't listen to them. They don't know what they're talking about. They need to STOP saying that there isn't anything they can do, because there IS, they CAN, they just don't want to.

It's all because of money, it all comes down to money in the end. Don't you worry, I'll manage to afford it somehow. I'll pay for it somehow. I will swallow my pride and ask family and friends, I will refinance my current loan, I will do whatever I have to. I'll take care of it, don't worry, it's just money, and we'll get through this just fine.

This can't be The End. No. NO! I refuse to accept it! It's only been two years- We've barely had Two Stinking Years together- There is no possible way- No, you can't-

I can't lose you.

I won't say that I can't live without you, because I can...

... I just don't want to.

I do need you, though.

Please... Please... Someone... Anyone... Help us... Please... I'll do anything. Anything.

Hey.

Hey, it's OK. I'm here. I'm right here with you, OK? I didn't leave you. Let's just... For now, let's just sit here... and remember...

When I first saw you, yes, I know, it's a cliche, but I really did think, from the start, that you were The One for me. You immediately caught my eye, and I knew, there was no need for me to look anywhere else. Didn't even care that my family and at least some of my friends kept telling me I was crazy to want you. You would be too high maintenance, they said. I wouldn't be able to support both you and myself, they said.

But you were gorgeous, and I didn't want anybody else to have you. I had to have you, and no, it wasn't just about your looks. You helped me to experience so many new things, you've taken me to so many places. Thanks to you, I reached distances I never even thought to try to cross before. Yes, I was the one who made the decisions of where we went, but you were the one who made it possible.

You were my first Choice. I myself chose you, rather than let someone else decide what is "good" for me. And I have no regrets.

Those risks I took to make you mine, to keep you, all of it was worth it. I only wish... That same miracle that saved you once before would manifest again now. I'm sorry... Maybe if it wasn't me... If it was somebody else with you... Someone else might have been able to keep you safe, or if all of this happened anyway, someone else might have been able to save you.

They said that there wasn't anything else they could do...

I don't want to believe them... If I could fix you myself, I would. I've been trying to fight for you all this time... I really don't want to give up, but... what else can I do? What more could I do? Am I giving up on you too soon?

I hate this.

Why now...? Why you? He was at fault. He hit you. Why did you have to be the worst off for it? ...I won't wish it was me instead of you. That... That won't do anyone any good. Instead, I do wish it was him instead of you.

I hate so much that he's still out there, still alive somewhere, while you...

They're telling me that I need to move on.

Though I don't like it, I do understand where they're coming from. I, too, can see the sense of it, and though you can't answer me even if I did ask you, I do want to know... if you feel the same way. Or if you would resent me at all.

I wish you could tell me if you forgive me.

Hopefully, you won't be too upset with me... once I do... find something new. Believe me when I say, I won't ever forget you. You are one of a kind. Don't let anyone else tell you different.

And although you are gone now, you will always have a place in my heart.

I miss you.

Goodbye.