A Golden Friend

On one particular day my husband went to work. The very next evening he was put on life support. He hadn't been acting right all day. He started coughing up blood. I called the paramedics. The paramedics said he had no bottom blood pressure. It was recorded at being zero. He had C.O.P.D. and pneumonia and sepsis. We didn't realize how ill he was. He had worked the day before! He could still talk and when asked his name and what year it was he answered the paramedics correctly. I stayed with him at the hospital twenty nine days. Those were the longest most horrific twenty nine days I had ever been through. I have a best friend. Years before I had babysat her children. That would have been thirty four years ago. We had lost touch for years. At one time I was the owner of a video store. One day a regular customer came in with a man. He decided to sign up for a video card. I recognized his name. I told him I was pretty sure I knew his ex wife. He asked me how I knew her. I told him I use to watch the kids. He confirmed his ex wife was my friend. He offered me her phone number willingly. During that time period I had been praying that God would send me a christian friend. I called my friend and we picked up where we had left off with ease. She was a christian! God had answered my prayer. I never saw her ex husband again. She and I on the other hand have talked almost daily ever since. That occurred around seventeen years ago. My friend and I talk on the phone almost daily and see each other when we can. When my husband was hospitalized I did a lot of praying. Many times I'd find myself walking down the long corridors through doors until I would come to the hospital's chapel room. I would get down on my knees at the pew and cry and pray. I'd write my prayer requests in the book provided on a pulpit. My husband started to improve and they took him off the antibiotics. The damage from the sepsis on his lungs was more damaging than we had thought. His condition started to worsen. This whole ordeal was traumatic. I was afraid to walk down the hall to his room for fear of what I'd find. I didn't know what his vital signs would be doing. His numbers on the machines went up and down like a rollercoaster. Many times walking down that hall I would picture Jesus walking beside me. Jesus gave me the courage to move forward. It took all I had to put one foot in front of the other. I was almost frozen in fear. I would call my friend several times a day. She would come to the hospital and sit with me. Every time my husband took a turn for the worse my friend would appear. I slept in the lobby. There was no space in my husband's room. He was hooked to a ventilator and the ECMO machine. There were multiple IV bottles hanging everywhere. He was inabated. They decided it was time to switch him to a trache. There was seepage around the trache so they had to perform a second surgery and put in a new trache. The seepage of blood around the new trache continued. My husband was on a blood thinner so the bleeding never completely subsided. They had to use a blood thinner while the ECMO machine was running. If they didn't the machine could throw blood clots which could kill him. Every time I'd call my friend she'd come rushing to my side. I love her so much. I felt as if I'd lose my sanity. She would talk and pray with me. I thank God her husband was so understanding. He never complained about me stealing time from his wife. My husband caught pneumonia for a second time. He was failing even though he was on two life support machines. They were both running at full capacity which numbers were at one hundred percent. My friend came down to the hospital one night. I was in bad shape and terrified. My anxiety was out of control. Her and I went outside of the hospital and sat down on some secluded steps. It was kind of creepy out there because all the crazies came out at night. I witnessed two people at different times get arrested for acting irrationally. But, my friend and I ignored our surroundings and focused on our conversation and prayers. We smoked our cigarettes and talked for hours. We prayed together and talked some more. I don,t think I could have made it without her that night. We stayed out there for hours. We did periodically go in and check on my husband. Since there was no change and he was medically put to sleep we went back outside. She is like gold to me. I thank God for her. Her being with me and talking to me helped my anxiety remain at a controllable level. My husband and I were married for over thirty years. I met him when I was five. In the fifth grade, the music teacher called the whole fifth grade down to the music room. We all went down to watch my husband play drums. He was the best drummer I have ever met. He had a natural talent and he was a perfectionist with his skill. Over the years he had many musicians wanting him to join their bands. We dated in the ninth grade. We married when we were in our mid twenties. He was a part of my life my whole life. His sickness not only sucked the life out of him, but it was taking its toll on me. Watching my love, my friend, my husband fail was the hardest thing I have been through to this day. He was my partner in crime. It was no wonder I was about to lose my shit. But, thank God I had my friend. There were certain family members who were faithful to me and would come when things got bad with my husband. My friend took the cake. Day or night at any hour she would talk to me or rush down to the hospital. My husband truly began to fail. In spite of all the efforts the doctors and nurses performed, he was not recovering. His organs were failing. My friend was right there for me. All the family came down to the hospital because it was almost time for my husband to leave this world. There sat my friend. She sat in the back of the room, but she was there. I could barely get through what was happening. I acted stronger than what I was in front of my children and grandchildren and friends who are like family. They all were observing what was happening. The room was filled with our loved ones. It was time to say goodbye to my husband. The doctor lowered his pain medication so he would be coherent enough to acknowledge our presence. I had to tell him God was taking him home. His eyes grew large and he shook his head no. I looked up and my friends eyes met with mine. He didn't want to go, but his body disagreed. My friend was an ever ready participant in this horrid event that was taking place. All the family and friends took turns saying goodbye to my husband. They all told him they loved him. I kissed his mouth and face repeatedly. I told him he did well on Earth. He did his job. He took care of me and our children and grandchildren. The doctor finally told me it was time. There was my friend watching and waiting, as we all were. Her presence was strongly felt by me. The talk we had that night on the steps helped to save me from a nervous breakdown. The doctor upped the pain and nerve medications and turned off the machines. He showed empathy and did his best for my husband to pass away peacefully. My husband's eyes closed. His beautiful blue eyes had closed for good. He went to sleep. His breathing became shallow and his lips turned blue. He stopped breathing. He went into a forever sleep. I held onto him until he was cold and I was certain he was no longer in that body anymore. There was my friend waiting on the wings. We went outside the hospital and sat on the wall by the ambulance entrance. We smoked our cigarettes and talked more. I love her and thank her for being there for me. I knew she had a lot going on in her own life at the time. Yet, she made time for me when I was in trouble. I give thanks to my family and friends for being there. They helped me too. They all brought me food and would make me eat. But, my friend, my best friend would hold a special place in my heart forever. She was with me every step of the way. Any and all hours I could call her and she would talk and pray with me. She would rush to the hospital to sit with me. Many people were helpful during that time. My friend has a spot in my heart no one can replace. She is a true friend to this very day. I hope one day I can be there for her like she was for me. What was that old saying? "Make new friends, Keep the old, Some are silver, Some are gold". She is gold!