An Odd Brother

The hushed whispers around me start to build around me. I generally don’t pay that much attention to the chatter, but one catches my ear. “Isn’t that one of them?” I take a quick look around to see what they’re talking about. Everyone’s eyes are darting back and forth from me to the door. When I meet their gaze, their heads quickly turn.

What’s this about? My thoughts are jumping to millions of conclusions until my sight finally drifts back up to the door.

Not here.

Please, not here.

Please let this be a dream.

My eyes meet up to the familiar face of my brother in the shops’ entrance. He smiles at me, but I let my gaze drop back down to my computer screen, ignoring him.

It’s just a dream. He’s not here.

He can’t be here. He knows it.

He shouldn’t be out here.

I should tell him to leave.

Everything inside me is telling me I need to make him leave, but I can’t let anyone see me with him. My best chance is to just ignore him and hope he leaves.

The shop seems to go quiet as his steps grow louder and louder approaching my table. I close my eyes shut as if doing so will make him go away. My hands start to shake, but I grab my knees and squeeze to make it stop. I feel sweat form on my palm. I try to calm myself down.

Why should I be worried? 

It’s just my brother.

He won’t-

The chair shrieked against the tile floor.

He’s going to sit with me.

I struggle to control my breathing and I open my eyes again. I lift my hands off my lap and place them on the keyboard, pretending I didn’t notice over my music in my ears. Even that had seemed to go quiet. I switched the playlist to a louder one and turned up the volume so I would have an excuse for ignoring him. 

My fingers make an attempt to fly across the keyboard, but it’s impossible. They’re shaking harder now and I can’t hide it. People are staring at us. Shakily I pull up a video so I won’t have to do anything with my hands. As soon as it starts playing, they shoot down and I squeeze them between my lap.

A jumble of sounds find their way into my ears, but I don’t hear a thing. My heartbeat is pounding in my head and my breathing is hard. My eyes dart around, searching for something to focus on other than my worry. I see that his lips are moving. I don’t want to know what he’s saying. I don’t want him to be saying anything at all. I find a bird outside and study its movements, but my worry won’t go away.

I wish he would just shut up.

But he won’t. 

Please stop talking.

Knowing he’s talking and not knowing what he’s saying makes me worry more. At that moment, he decides to wave his hand above my screen. I pull my earbuds out and try to act casual, but no one else is acting casual. Everything is silent, and I can feel everyone’s eyes drilling into me.

Please stop-

“Brother!” His voice sounds casual. “How are you? It’s been a while since I’ve seen you.”

I whisper under my breath a “Fine,” and look back down at the screen. The silence is gone, but it’s only replaced by whispers.

“So it’s true.”

“I can’t believe it.”

“Someone took one of them in?”

Others just stared at us, some with slightly dropped jaws in disbelief.

My brother, oblivious to it all, looked back at me. “What was that you said? I can’t quite, uh...” He paused searching for the word. He still occasionally struggled with remembering some English words. “Hear you. That’s the word!” He held his hand up in the air then slapped it down hard on the table. It cracked down on the table, shattering the silence. A few jumped up slightly and the hushed whispers grew louder.

Panic starts to rise in my chest. I need to get out of here. He can’t be here.

“I was just about to leave,” I say as I close the screen. I slip it into my bag, wishing I could turn off my life just as easily.

Why did you say that? You’re not supposed to talk to him.

No one talks to them!

I take another deep breath as I turn around. I reach for my bag, but it’s shaking so hard it takes a few attempts to pick it up. I slip it over my shoulder and start heading for the door, staring intently at the ground in front of my feet. My eyes dart from tile to tile, trying to find something to focus on.

A cold hand grabs my wrist. I stiffen. Please no. Please no. I shut my eyes and will the universe to stop, but my attempts are futile. 

“Brother,” I hear his version of a whisper. It sounds like he’s trying to vomit. Why can’t he just be normal in something? “Why are you…” I could practically hear his face scrunch up in frustration. “Ignoring me?” There was a soft collective gasp. 

Not in public.

He turned me around and I found that he was still seated at the table. It was still strange to see his arm stretch at will. I shot him a glare and his expression turned to one of surprise. Or at least it looked like a surprise. It was his way of showing confusion. I think. It turned to one of contempt. Realization.

He let go of my arm. His hand flew back his body, dropping back down to his sides. “Sorry, I forgot.”

You forgot?! How could you- Aaahhh! I wanted to scream at him. I moved away for a reason, and that was because of you! There was an immediate sharp stab of guilt forming inside of me. I just wanted to be accepted.

“Get out,” a deep voice called. I was so lost in thought, I hadn’t noticed the store manager walking up to him. He held a bat. “We don’t serve your kind here.”

A look of fear washed over my brother’s face. The only facial expression his kind shared with humans. “I’m sorry. I was just here to see my brother.”

I almost shouted, “Leave him alone!” but it got caught in my throat. If I did that, so many things could go wrong. I could be banned from the shop for being related to him. I could lose my job. I could lose friends. My body stood immovable as the two sides of me clashed.

Memories started flooding over me. Laughter together at the dinner table. The constant whispers. Name calling. Stretch. Alien. Alien. The huge smile on my face as we pretended to save our cat from evil people. A fist connecting with my head as I stood to defend my brother.

Could I be that brave now? Would I take another blow for him?

My fists clenched so hard, leaving fingernail imprints on the inside of my palm.

“I’ll head out.” He stood up without turning around. I wish he had. My hand twitched open slightly, but it was too late for me to do anything. He collapsed on the ground.