The Story of Quickhand Billy

It all started when Quickhand Billy walked into our little town. It was a hot summer day, like any old, regular day. But on that day, there was something different in the air. You could almost smell it.

Quickhand Billy walked into town wearing his signature side bag where he would hide all kinds of tricks. Some say it is magical, some say it is bottomless, some say it made him look like a girl. Whatever they say, Billy would never leave his home without it.

He pulled out his pistol and loaded it, then fired two shots into the sky. "Alright dimwits", he yelled, "I want all your gold, jewelry and silver in the town's square when the clock strikes 12. Or else…"

All the doors were shut and all the windows rolled down. Everybody knew that you should be afraid of Quickhand Billy. He will shoot you before you can even say: "hasta la vista, baby" once.

Billy got his nickname in highschool. His actual name is Estephen Mendoza Guerrero Gonzalez the III. But that was too long of a name, so everybody just called him Billy. The Quickhand part of his name was added after he joined the military. He says that he once killed forty Indians with just six bullets and a dull bayonet. 

Our town's main export was gold. The first settlers came here even before the beginning of the gold rush. They chose the land based on it's golden color, which doesn't really has to do with how much gold it has in it, but they got lucky. Since gold was our main export, if Billy was to take it away from us, this would be a tough blow to the town. 

The doors swang open as Billy marched into the saloon to find a drink to quench his thirst. The pianist played some happy tunes, and the bartender polished some shot glasses. But there was still this smell in the air, the smell of something that could go wrong. 

All the eyes in the room were following Billy's steps, sneaking looks mid chat to check the unfitting fellow. Billy sat down at the bar and ordered his drink: "one beer please", he said politely, "oh, and I think everybody is staring at you".

The bartender set down a napkin and placed Billy's drink on top. Billy signed the pianist to quit playing, grabbed his drink and walked into the middle of the crowded room.

"Look," he said while he turned to look at all the people in the room, "I know we hit it off a little rough, but you know what, I have an offer that you won't be able to refuse."

He spread his hands wide and raised his voice: "I need a couple of dimwits like y'all to help me in a robbery of Jeffrey Mayers' house. If you say no, I'll take all your gold and leave no trace of your lame little town. But, if you take my offer, I will leave you alone... until I'm bored again."

Jeffrey Mayers was Quickhand Billy's worst enemy. Rumor has it that they were the best of friends until Mayers ran away with Billy's fiance. Jeffrey's wife and Quickhand's ex fiance died from unknown reasons three years ago. Some believe it's Billy's vengeful soul that left his body to take revenge, some believe it was dysentery. Billy wasn't able to track down Jeffrey, until now.

The saloon was silent. You could smell the trouble coming. You could hear it knocking on the door and inviting itself in. You could hear it whisper in your ear with it's blood curdling breath. Then, something broke the silence.

"I'll do it", said Aimless Joe. 

"Me too", said Bobby.

"I'm in", said Cotton Eye Joe.

More and more men volunteered to go on this revenge seeking journey in hope of saving their beloved town. The discernible trouble appeared to turn back on its steps and walk out the door.

The men left at night. A party of twenty something fellas disappeared into the cold desert night. They chose to move on foot, since horses may make a noise. The men, with Billy in the lead, walked quietly and attentively until dawn, when they finally reached Jeffrey Mayers' house.

Mayers was a wealthy folk. He was a banker and a pawnbroker. He was known as an egotistical maniac. Jeffery's house was a two stories tall mansion. 

The men stood in front of the tall house awaiting instructions. Quickhand Billy was pacing quietly back and forth in front of them, devising a plan in his head. The lack of sleep and the long walk might have lowered his confidence a bit. Finally, Billy stood tautly in front of the crowd of anticipating men.

"Boys," he said with a noticeable tiredness in his voice, "we have to turn back."

The men were stunned. A sudden whisper broke through the crowd. The men could not believe what Billy was saying.

"You must be kidding me!" Said one brute.

Then the whispering crowd turned into a shouting crowd. People were cussing and yelling. Some turned back to go home. Some were moving toward Billy in a threatening way. 

"Boys, boys", said Billy, "please be quiet or else… Mayers might walk out on us, and then the trouble will get real bad."

"He better come out or else you'll be the one we'll beat!" 

"Yeah!" Cheered the boys.

"Sometimes", said Billy, lowering his hat off his head and holding it to his chest, next to his heart, "sometimes you have to fold your tail between your legs, and go back to the place you came from. Sometimes your pride blinds you. Sometimes vengeance takes over you. See, if my fiance was truly happy with this scumbag, then I'm happy. In fact… Hold on a sec."

Billy reached to the door of the house and knocked three solid knocks. The door opened with a slight creak. Jeffrey peeped through the gap. 

"Mr. Mayers".

"Mr. Mendoza".

The crowd of men tried to get a good look of the action. They were mumbling and whispering to each other. Billy turned around and shushed them.

"Mr. Mayers, I have a question for you." Said Billy.

"Is that why you brought a hundred men? For a question?"

"Very funny Jeffery, but I'm afraid this is serious matter."

"Do ask."

You could smell this weird smell again. The smell of trouble was once again in the air. But this time, it appeared to be stronger.

"Was Loraine happy with you? Was she satisfied? Did you give her all she ever wanted?"

"Yes", said Jeffery, "she loved it here. She lived life to it's fullest until her very last day."

"Thank you, Mr. Mayers."

Quickhand Billy turned to leave. All the men unloaded their guns and started packing. Billy turned to Jeffery once more and asked: "One last question. Did you love her?"

"Yes, like the moon loves the sea when it's tide. She was everything to me. She was my life."

Billy smiled. "Thank you Jeffery, have a good life."

"Thank you, now get the hell away from my house."

The men arrived to the entrance of our little town when the moon was tall in the sky. Billy stood tall in front of them and said: "This isn't what I imagined when I thought about this journey. But I found something better, inner peace. I will leave your pathetic little town now, see you around."

He tipped his hat and untied his horse from the town's gate. In one swift motion, he jumped on his horse and disappeared into the endless desert. You could smell it, the smell of a happy ending.

And what happened to Billy, you may ask? Rumor has it that he changed his name to Goodshoes Billy, and settled down by himself at a farm in Arizona. Some people believe he was killed by a drug Lord's assassin, some think he adopted a kid. Whatever you believe, there's not one in our town that does not know the story, of Quickhand Billy.