The Watcher on Cedarwood Road

Submitted into Contest #182 in response to: Write a story where someone’s paranoia is justified.... view prompt

7 comments

Mystery Horror Suspense

Jamie was ready to restart her life.  She needed a change of scenery.  She needed something to keep her mind busy.  She had just broken up with her jealous boyfriend, Jed.  In an effort of making this new start, she found an old farmhouse on Cedarwood road on the outskirts of town for sale for a nominal price. 

Jed had accused her of cheating on him after she came home late from work one day.  He did not understand that lawyers sometimes need to work outside of normal business hours.  He was a third-grade teacher.  He didn’t understand the need to work late.  

That was not the first time he accused her.  His constant distrust in Jamie made her want to tear her hair out.  She did nothing wrong, and yet, he treated her as she had.  She was done feeling like the monster in this relationship.  Nothing could fix him.  She had previously spent a lot of time fixing Jed.  That energy on Jed had failed her.  She now spent a lot of time fixing the farm house on Cedarwood Rd.  

At this point she had only renovated her own bedroom in the farmhouse on Cedarwood Road She wanted to make sure she had a safe and comforting sanctuary for herself.  She had painted the walls a pale pink with a white border.  Resurfaced the wood floors.  And even bought herself a big comfortable bed from the mattress outlet to sit directly in the center of the room.

But ever since she arrived, she had a sense that something was not right.  It was not so much that she felt spirits around her as she felt like she was being watched. She heard strange noises when she laid in bed at night, and she couldn't shake the feeling that someone was always directly out of sight, watching her every move.

She tried to tell herself that it was just her imagination and distracted herself with various projects.  Her most recent project was retiling the kitchen floor. But the more she tried to push the thoughts away, the more they consumed her. She couldn't sleep, she couldn't focus on anything, and she couldn't shake the feeling that something was very, very wrong.

One night, she decided she needed to do something about this feeling.  Anything would help put her mind at ease. She grabbed a flashlight from the front hall closet and a kitchen knife, and she set out to investigate. She opened the heavy oak door to the front porch, and she stepped onto the wood planks and into the dark.  The nearest neighbor was a quarter mile away and she never got to fixing the wiring to the outdoor areas.  This left her in the dark except for the glow from the house and the full moon above her.

She took slow step after slow step.  The planks held in place by rusty nails creaked below her feet.  Her heart was pounding in her chest. She was terrified, but she was also determined to find out what was causing this feeling. She took steps.  One by one.  Her feet hit the cracked pavement that led to the gravel road.

As her eyes adjusted to the darkness using the full moon as the only light source, she saw the figure of a man staring at her.  With the light of the moon, she could make out his thin lips, his crooked nose, and his cold, empty eyes. He was tall and thin, with a sinister look on his face. He was dressed all in black, and he held something in his hand.

Jamie froze. She had never felt more terrified in her life.  She was alone and had only the knife in her hand for protection. She was sure that this man was here to hurt her, and she didn't know what to do. She opened her mouth to scream, but no sound came out.

The man started walking towards her, and she realized he was holding a camera. 

“Stop right there,” Jamie said.

“I come in peace,” the man said, “Jed sent me here.”

“Jet sent you?  Here?” Jamie asked.

The man nodded.

“In the middle of the night?” Jamie asked.

The man nodded again.

“I am a private eye.  He asked me to watch your house and report if there was anyone coming in and out of the house,” the reporter said.

“Why are you telling me this?  Doesn't this make you a horrible private investigator?” Jamie asked.

The private investigator looked down at his feet and kicked a rock, “I guess so.”  After a pause he continued, “I don’t have my license yet.  I’m still working on it.”

Jamie was silent as she listened.  Then she couldn’t help but laugh.  Jed could not even afford a real private investigator to track her down.

“Look…. What was your name?”  Jamie asked.

The private investigator looked up with a smile, “Pete.  But you can call me P.I. Pete.  I don’t have a business card but I can….”  

Jamie's eyes got big and she gave one stifled laugh before she composed herself.

 “Look, Pete.  I don’t need your business card.  There is no one here.  There will be no one here.  I would recommend you go home and study for your exam.  I also would recommend you learn from a real P.I. how to be stealthy.  You gave yourself away pretty easily.  And tell Jed to leave me alone.  I’m done with him.” And with that Jamie turned around and walked back into the house locking the solid wood door behind her.

She placed the knife on the counter, avoiding the unsealed grout as best she could, and retreated to her bedroom, the sanctuary she had created. She was feeling more at ease than she had in weeks.  She climbed up onto the mattress outlet bed and closed her eyes.  She fell into the deepest sleep she had in weeks.  

Jamie now had the sanctuary of the farmhouse on Cedarwood road back.

January 26, 2023 22:57

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7 comments

Rebecca Miles
10:27 Jan 29, 2023

Brave lady going out there and I'm so glad this didn't go where I thought: full-blown horror tag! I've got two tips for you which I hope will help you as you transition to fiction writing, as you state in your bio. I'm an English teacher and Reedsy judge, so I mean well! First off, inject some tension. I never really felt that she was in danger. Try to create a bit more of a sinister atmosphere for this genre. Perhaps she glimpses someone outside on the night before? A car is always parked a little way off...a few more clues will help crea...

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Madeline Honig
19:23 Jan 30, 2023

Thank you for your feedback! I am still pretty new to this and trying to learn everything I possibly can, so I really appreciate it. Thanks again.

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Leanne Bosse
18:21 Jan 28, 2023

I loved your title, it pulled me in right away:) Great use of descriptions throughout as well!

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Madeline Honig
19:23 Jan 30, 2023

Thanks! I'm glad I was able to catch your attention.

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Jack Hillier
14:50 Feb 09, 2023

great job team

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Jack Hillier
14:50 Feb 09, 2023

really good

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Jack Hillier
14:49 Feb 09, 2023

brilliant

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