Searching For Something

I've always been searching for something. I've always knew there was more. But I never could find quite what I was looking for. But that didn't stop me from going on grand adventures...

One day I was washing my face getting ready to go to the airport on yet another treasure hunting opportunity, and when I stood up the most excruciating pain hit my neck and shot up into my head and down my whole body. I had no idea what had hit me! I tried to lie down for a few minutes to see if the pain would subside, but I couldn't even get on my bed the pain was so great. I stood there for a bit and finally I was able to finish getting dressed and my husband, Ron, and I took off.

During the plane ride, I was still hurting, so I closed my eyes and tried to imagine what we might discover on this trip. We spent four days searching for gold or gems, but to our disappointment, we came up empty and had to head home. Not finding any treasure was bad enough, but I was still a ridiculous amount of pain, especially my head. I couldn't understand how the throbbing could continue for so long.

We finally get back home and I decide what I need is a really good night's sleep in my own bed; yep, that would solve whatever was wrong with me. Nope. Wrong. Nice try as staying positive. I woke up the net morning worse than ever, so bad in fact Ron said he was taking me to the emergency room. Usually I would have put up a big fight about going to the emergency room, but this time I couldn't argue, This time I couldn't even get out of bed! Ron called the ambulance and off I went to the hospital. Funny thing is, I don't remember the ride there, or being in the emergency room, or being taken in for the CT scan, or being taken to an operating room. I guess my body had resisted the pain for long enough and just shut down. When I finally woke up I was in a hospital room hooked up to all kinds of monitoring devices and still in horrible pain. Ron was right there at my side and wanted so badly to help me, but there was nothing he could do but call for a nurse. I couldn't understand what was going on. A nurse came in, administered more pain meds, and left. I couldn't function at this point and went back to sleep. Well, that didn't last long. If you have ever shad to stay for any length of time in a hospital, you know how much sleep you don't get. One of the monitors I was attached to kept beeping, very loudly. Someone came in every two hours to make me take these incredibly large pills. A "lab" person came in during the dead of night to get a fresh blood sample. And different people kept coming in to make me move my feet, push and pull, and my hands, push, pull, squeeze. they made me read these strange lists of nonsense words on laminated sheets and look at a scene and tell what was happening. None of this made any sense to me and I just wanted everyone to leave me alone. I just wanted to go home.

It was several days later that I was finally coherent enough for my husband to explain what was going on; why I was still in the hospital. At first he was trying to protect me by telling me only the reason I was in the hospital to begin with. He explained that I had experienced a thunder-clap headache the morning we left on our trip. This isn a sign of an aneurysm bursting, and that is what happened to me. I had an aneurysm burst in my brain. I had experienced a sub arachnoid hemorrhage, a medical emergency that may lead to permanent brain damage or death if not treated promptly. You can imagine what I was thinking at this point. At least now I understood why I was still in the hospital, why I was given all the hand, foot, and reading tests. I understood why I was being monitored so closely and attached to so many machines. But why did this happen? I'm a healthy middle aged person. I couldn't stop wondering why this happened to me.

The next day a doctor came in to check on me, apparently he came in every day, but this was the first day I was coherent enough for him to talk with me. Little did I know I was about to learn how serious my condition was. I was about to learn what Ron was trying to protect me from. I was still far from feeling like myself, but good enough to hear him say to me, "Hey, there you are! You know you shouldn't be with us. You have a second chance at life. Use it well." After hearing that, I have no idea what the rest of our conversation was like. I couldn't get past his first few sentences.

That night as I'm all alone, no doctors or nurses or lab people there, I was still haunted by what the doctor had said to me earlier that day. I had an aneurysm burst in my brain and I got on a plane in search of treasure, some gold perhaps. Was it worth it? I could have died on the plane there. Was it worth it? Was the treasure we were seeking worth it? And then it hit me, what I had been searching for my whole life, the real meaning of treasure itself! Life! Life is such a treasure and it's one you don't need to go in search of. Life is the grand adventure and every day is a new treasure to be discovered. As I lie there that night, I thought of all the grand trips and experiences Ron and I have had together over the years. And I smiled knowing what a treasure each one of them was. It was then I knew that I would recover from this strange incident, and Ron and I would go on many more adventures. But this time I knew we were not in search of treasure; I knew each day was a treasure in and of itself.

It is almost 2 months since I experienced the worst pain of my life; that nasty thunder-clap headache, and I am pleased to say that , I am fine. I have no side affects, no brain damage, and I have found what I have always been searching for. I have found my treasure; life. And trust me, I will use it well!