The Monster Under the Bed

As a baby we often fear the loud noise and not having our momma near, as young toddlers we fear strangers in general, and as we grow a little older, our fears change to the stern doctor and the dentist, hiding behind the mask. We fear what they might do to us even as we hang tightly to our parent with pint sized fists. Strangers are not the only thing we fear as we start growing through childhood. The boogie man, the monsters in the closet, a ghost that bangs on steel pipes within the basement, the goblins under the bed and giant frogs that like the droplets in your shower are just a few of those things that rule our imagination. 

Throughout the night, on any given night, a myriad of childhood fears will keep a small, little soul awake. There are as many a good parent that will leave a light on in the hall and the door open a crack just to have that little soul find peace and go to sleep. Leave a light on, door open, and do not forget that sheets protect our tiny feet from those slimy green goblins lurking under the bed! The slimy green goblins with those long, green fingers, warts attached with wiry hair growing out of them and those yellowed pointy nails. This has kept me awake many a dark night in the country by the lake, in the dark recesses of the bed.  

An all-time favorite childhood game of mine was playing hide and seek. In the middle of stuffies the size of a small mountain, an empty spot under the kitchen sink, or in the bathtub with the curtain closed. And of course, it is even better if the hiding place was a dark corner of the house, the under side of the bed way back against the wall, among the dust bunnies. However, a childhood game is much different than night time when it is time for a night of sleep. Day and night, two completely different time zones when it comes to playing a game versus going to bed!

I remember, as a small child, fear of the dark was that fear for me. More specifically, fear of what was under the bed, my bed, at night. As a four-year-old, my monster under the bed did not stop at being that “under the bed” monster that I was so frightened of. I remember seeing him in the shower one night. “No!” said my sister. “That is just the shower curtain all curled up to the side.” My four-year-old mind still thought it was a giant green frog taking up residence in our shower but okay!! I guess we shall see in the morning, won’t we? Assurances from those that are older never seemed to help shake that fear of something under the bed (or in the shower).

Additionally, giant green frogs and showers aside, that fear of green hands at the ready to grab bare ankles has followed me into the teens, and finally into adulthood. Unfounded fear. Whatever happened to make me believe that this silly concept is true? Where was the evidence? And whatever made me believe that something as puny as silk sheets would be a protection against those said hands? All I remember, in my overactive imagination, was heading up the stairs to my room on the left, getting dressed in my pj’s, and jumping into bed at full speed. Just as fast, even in the 80-degree night air, the sheets came up and over, because…well, you know, those sheets are superhuman in strength and protect me even now against the hands that like the tiny feet found on that of young children.

Even now, now that I know better and have even bigger fears than those of childhood, I still find myself wanting to cover up at night with sheets made of cotton. Fear of the unknown. Fear of what might be lurking under the bed in the dark recesses still haunt me even in adulthood. Taunting me with thoughts of nibbling on toes and plucking toenails off tiny little toes. I have done many things to shake this fear to no avail. Still there, even with a nightlight. Soft music? Nope, still there. Writing poetry sort of helps but not really, a dull fear still resides in the background of my mind.

This childhood fear of something under the bed, ready to grab my ankles still resonates with me today. I cannot shake the feeling that I need to protect my feet under flimsy sheets even now as a middle-aged woman. I have done a lot to try ridding my mind of such silly imaginations. Launching myself off away from the light switch and shooting into bed like a rocket, did not help at all. The music only made it worse. I kept imagining the goblin under the bed was dancing to the music and singing a monstrous tune. Eventually I decided to do something that should have been done long ago…clean out the broken toys I discarded eons ago, the trash and wrappers from the candy (that the goblin ate, I promise!), and the broken ant farm sadly on its’ side. The dust bunnies shot up through the noisy vacuum like an ant eater eating little black ants all in a row.

After vacuuming, I take a long look around my jumbled room. There is perhaps one more thing that I can do to shake this childhood fear that has followed me into my adulthood. Deciding to rearrange the room, I get started by moving and rearranging furniture, putting clothes in the closet upon the hangers they had abandoned long ago. A once forgotten yellow furry rug now sleeps at the side of my bed. Oh, yeah! My bed? It is next to the light switch by the door!! No more running to the bed, my haven, like a banshee as I go to my peaceful sleep. I think I finally did it. I think I finally shook the childhood fear of monster under the bed.