To Tempt a Monster

A monster can be so evil and threatening so long as it’s widely feared by people. To some, a monster is a man with a knife tainted with the crimson blood of his cheating lover. A monster can be the horned demon in legends or a pale ghost engulfed by the darkness of an abandoned home. A monster, in the most simplistic minds, can be an aloof passerby that doesn’t give the little schoolboy a high five or fist bump. But to all, there are threatening creatures in this world, skewing the perceptions of good and evil, reality and imagination: so where is the real monster lurking?

I’ve been wondering, contemplating this for times long beyond my years. How is it that reality and the mind are so distant from each other? It aggravates me to no end when someone is so disconnected from reality. He says that his ex-girlfriend is the devil, when the devil is a satanic creature that does much more than key a car after a breakup. She says that woman is an evil, backstabbing, fake friend, but when did bitter women start stabbing backs like Norman Bates? Oh, she’s backstabbing with words, now? There are certainly more tangible evils than that. Please, oh, please, let her do worse than that. Nothing, in the minds of these people, comes close to being a true monster.

People’s ignorance brings me no end of bitter feelings. So I’ve looked into it. Little do they know, the word “monster” most likely comes from the Latin word “monstrum,” which means an omen of misfortune. During the medieval ages, there were a myriad of believers of superstition who thought that anomalies like birth defects were a sign of evil. Therefore, “monstrum” may have developed into the old French word “monstre,” which means an animal with a strange appearance. But today, “monster" is used not only to describe a frightening creature but also to describe a frightening character! It’s transitioned from being just a physical fear to an abstract one: how did such a change happen, if not from the divine beliefs of the middle ages?

For this, society is ill to do. They change words on a whim. Whatever meaning bodes with the current times, they follow in rabid pursuit, devouring words with a sickly passion. How can I express myself in such a world that can't agree on good and evil? Like a moth to a lamp, I must resist any sort of temptation for fear of what they might say. Will I be a monster if I describe the satisfying things I’d do to those people who agitate me? How I’d wrench out their vocal chords from their vile bodies and hush their big mouths with a needle and thread? To those that twist this invaluable word to please their conscience, oh, all the things I wish I could do to them!

How did this wide level of misunderstanding occur? Based on my meticulous research, these varied definitions may have arisen from books. Toward the end of medieval times, education experienced a spike in popularity. Due to the Industrial Revolution, having a higher education became a necessity in order to climb up the corporate ladder. Universities also became more commonplace. Modern literature, consequently, developed around the 18th century. The world at the time also experienced political unrest as revolutions were changing existing government structures. Thus, gothic literature was born as a way to comment on the sheer terror of a chaotic society.

A significant element of gothic fiction are the nightmarish monsters. Creatures like Dracula and Frankenstein appeared for the first time during the gothic era. But it wasn’t just their gaunt features and contorted bodies that were depicted in these stirring stories. What made gothic monsters fearsome were their deadly characters; vampires could suck the blood, zombies could eat the brain, and werewolves could bite the flesh of a human. Monsters became a way to depict freakish beings with the qualities of both the supernatural and humankind.

The person coined with the founding of gothic horror is Horace Walpole. Walpole’s novel The Castle of Otranto is about a prince who obsesses over his power and prestige, causing him to commit sins, and eventually, murder. In the story, Walpole writes that he’s a “savage, inhuman… murderous monster”. In the gothic world, the prince is the earliest example of a monster taking the form of a regular human being. Rather than his appearance, it’s his unethical behavior that distinguishes him as the villain in the story.

But was it really his unethical behavior that bothered them, or was it that it affected them personally? If the prince had hid his dark desires like me, then no one would’ve called him a monster. It’s only when he’s transparent, when I’ve had enough and want to be honest with everyone, that the world turns on us.

From here onto modern times, the meaning of the word has forever changed shape; rather than a way to express apparent ugliness, it’s evolved into an internal grotesqueness that exists within humans. But in today’s society, to describe someone as a monster would be to call them evil—whether that evil be miniscule or astounding in size. The extent to which the word applies to someone is limitless. It can be anything like an act of disrespect to an act of torture. It can be verbal or physical. So which definition is right—or is there even a correct one?

Society can be very, very limiting in this way. That’s why I must remain one step ahead, so that everything I may think, may do, or may think to do follows their moral compass. Why else would I be so knowledgeable about monsters? It’s so I can ground myself in society. I will be their slave for eternity because, like other people, I find myself confined to the lawfulness of the world. Monsters know this as well—that’s why many of them conceal their true selves. The werewolf transforms in a dark forest where no one is around. The ghost stays within the shadows, appearing only in the night’s solitude. The vampire masquerades as a human until it can bear its fangs in the comfort of an old castle. 

Nevertheless, my intense irritation shouldn’t be mistaken for ignorance. I realize that a monster can’t be defined so easily one way or another. Times change and evolve, and so do words. The beliefs held in the old days don’t necessarily apply now. But based on its Latin roots, a monster certainly shouldn’t be taken lightly. It will always carry a negative connotation. And yet, it isn’t taken seriously like it was in the past. Monsters have become a game for people to abuse, to analyze, and to exploit. Nowadays, people seek out monsters through horror movies and killer documentaries. There will forever be monsters lurking in the world—but how evil they are all depends on what they think, and the lens in which they view evil through!

It’s us that are so grounded in reality that feel this inseparable longing to the other side. Besides, society can’t exist without its dark counterpart; they find solace in it, after all! But don’t be mistaken: I don’t consider myself a monster. In fact, I feel more of a belonging on this planet than any other human being. 

Everyone is trying to follow the boundaries of good that society has moved time and time again, all the while condemning people on the other side of the boundary so that they may seem more righteous. I am no exception to this horrifying game. Trapped as I am, I must continue to live in the shadow of society until my entire character has been devoured whole by their wrath. Oh, a faith so terribly evil and cruel!

But I’ll continue to be maddened to no end by those who know nothing about real monsters.