Memory

It was hard to put it in words. The feeling that was inside me, some sort of emptiness. It’s been two year. Two. It felt like a millenium. He promised that he would come back home. He promised that he would visit before the end of the year. It has been two “end of the years” and I have not seen his face. I missed him. I really did. I didn’t believe it at first, but it became very apparent to me and my friends over time.

I remembered hearing the engines roar. I watched him get on that plane. I was fine with it at that moment. After he entered the plane, a weight in my gut fell on top of my heart. I cried. I was his little sister. He was leaving me. How could he do that to me? College was the answer. Bonus points for the Ivy League. 

I’ve grown to hate college. The word was poison for me. A place to go to that causes debt, anxiety, and separation from your friends and family. I didn’t want to go to college. I used to, until my brother went first. My parents really want me to go so I could get a degree. I refused. I will not miss out on a chance to see my brother again.

A growing fear gnawed at my brain. Could something bad have happened to my brother, and I would not know? Was he dead? Kidnapped? Tortured? Did he lose his mind? His memories? I hated not knowing. He hasn’t responded to any of my texts, nor my parents’. Could he have lost all his belongings? Roaming around, homeless and broke? Maybe his phone was taken? I hope not. I bought him that phone on his last Christmas with us.

“Aaron!” I shouted. “Santa came!” He chuckled at me. I gazed into his green eyes, the same color as mine, and smiled back at him. I no longer believed in Santa. He never granted what I wanted for Christmas. My brother wasn’t here this Christmas.

“He sure did. Lots of presents for you.” Half of them were from him, if I recall correctly.

“Open them with me!” I think I was selfish because who wouldn’t be selfish? Free presents from a magical fat man? Hell yes. But I really wanted to spend all of Christmas with Aaron. I was not letting Mary get more attention from him. Mary would see him in college. I would not.

“Alright, let’s start with your stocking.” I jumped for joy as I dumped everything inside the stocking onto the coffee table. The fireplace kept us warm, as well as my blanket, as I split plenty of chocolate candies onto the floor.

“Oops.”

“Mom, dad, how many chocolates did you buy for Eden?!” I still have the chocolates to this day. They’re in my fridge, frozen and sweet.

“I’m opening my gifts now!” I tore apart every single one without any meticulous care. Wrapping flew everywhere. It was like fireworks made of confetti. I remembered all the gifts I obtained; a new computer, a set of new paintbrushes and watercolors, and a telescope. I’m positive that Aaron bought me the telescope. Or got it from one of his friends. One of them was dreaming to become an astronomer.

The telescope was etched into my memories. Aaron and I would watch the starry skies every Friday. He would tell me the constellations in the sky. As I drove on the highway, I observed the skies one last time. I recognized his favorite right away, Orion. It reminded him of our father. He’s long gone now. I hope he’s watching over the both of us. At least, watching over Aaron.

I arrived at the airport, ticket in my hand. I was ready to see him again. I texted Mary after pushing through my shaking hands. All Mary said was to come over. She didn’t give me any details. The plane ride was quiet. Well, half the people onboard fell asleep, considering it was around 8 o’clock at night. But it was an uncomfortable silence. I hated silence.

Leaving the stars, sky, and airport, I quickly made my way over to the location Mary sent me. The door opened. Mary had the eyes of a dead person. She looked terrible, as if she had gotten no hours of sleep. We stared at each other for what felt like years until she spoke up.

“It’s you.” She said, not in an aggravated way, just monotone. Last time I saw her, she was the most energetic girl I’ve ever met. Looking at her felt like looking in a mirror. My guts told me something bad had happened. I didn’t know what to say back. Luckily, it didn’t matter. “Come in.” I followed her in the house as I saw the grey void of what once was a colorful house. I recognized it: Joselyn’s house. Why we were here, I never found out. She brought me to the backyard, filled to the brim with white carnations. They were beautiful.

“Why are we here?” I asked solemnly. But I was staring at the answer to my question. Three gravestones appeared in my vision, about a little ways into the forest. My stomach dropped. I could already tell where this was going.

“They were run over.” She answered, kicking the nearest lavender. I could tell that her voice was wavering, but not out of sadness. No, there was something off about her tone. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it.

“By what?”

“Drunk driver.” She’s not telling me something. Something important. I lowered my head and pressed on.

“I don’t believe you. Just tell me the truth.” Maybe I was too blunt at the time.

“T-They were...I saw them...run…running…” Her hands started shaking, but not out of anxiety.

“Running?”

“Screaming. Screaming in pain.” She’s not right in the head.

“Have you spoken to a therapist?”

“NO. I don’t need one.”

“Mary-”

“Don’t say that name.” I froze, realizing something. She’s not Mary...Mary’s name was on one of the graves. She noticed my eyes wide of shock. “They bled out.”

“B-Bled out?” She took a step closer. I saw Aaron’s name on one of the graves. I cried. He would protect me if he was alive. But he’s not. I’ve fully lost him. And now, I’m going to lose myself. A knife was drawn from her pocket, sharp, clean. Looked new, but she probably used it before. Her eyes were truly filled with madness.

“So….much...death….”

“Y-You killed them-”

“I didn’t...they broke the rules...they saw death…” She stabbed me in the guts and twisted the blade in, covering my mouth with her hand. My scream was muffled, my body vibrating in agony and bleeding out a river. It numbed for a bit before the knife exited my abdomen. I couldn’t move.

“You’re crazy!” I yelled. It didn't matter. She didn't hear my cries.

“Goodnight, Eden.”