Becoming a Star

Star's are more than just a star. Some stars are suns in the middle of the solar system. Some of those suns provide life and burning heat for the hunks of the rock that surround them. Some stars join together to create beautiful constellations. Some of those constellations helped to create the most beautiful and tragic religions and stories. Even stories of humans becoming stars. Throughout all of human existence, stars have been there. Maybe different stars, for all humans know, a star they look up to every night is no longer there and stars they've never seen have already been born. It's a shame that it's so hard to see a truly starry night sky anymore.

At least, that's what Celeste always thought.

Her father was an astronomer. Celeste wishes she could've heard him teach her about all of the universe. She never did though. He died in a car crash when he was star gazing a bit too late and fell asleep at the wheel two months before Celeste was born. The women lived. He didn't. Despite not having an astronomer to teach her everything, Celeste still loved the sky. All of the untold possibilities in it. Her mother always tried to teach her about her father and all the things she remembered him teaching her. She wasn't an astronomer so Celeste had to learn most of what she knows from her dad's old text books. Celeste's mother was a mathematician, they met at the university that they both taught at.

Right now, Celeste was sitting in a graveyard to look at the stars. Morbid, she knows, but it's the only decent place to look at the stars close to her home in the city. Close means it takes a little over an hour to get there. Once Celeste and her friends get out of the city, the rest of the sky is completely covered in forests. Not only is it the best place to see the stars nearby, it’s where she feels the most connected to the stars. To her father.

Celeste was laying next to where his coffin should be. 

"Lest, it's already after 1, we should head back," Luca says coming over to where Celeste is laying on the ground. Whenever Celeste decides to come to watch the stars, whether that be with her telescope or just laying on her back like tonight, at least two of her friends come with her. To protect her or something. Celeste doesn't really pay attention. When they're here they usually go get food and eat it here or something. Celeste doesn't know.

Celeste shoots up onto her hands. "What? When did we get here?"

"Eleven," Zoe grumbles.

"So we've been here two hours? I could've sworn it's only been ten minutes," Celeste mumbles in shock.

Luca rolls his eyes and crosses his arms over his chest. "You always say that. Now get up. We need to leave. Your mother has already texted each of us fifteen times and called Zoe. I don't even want to know the number she did on you."

Celeste smiles sheepishly, her head creeping in between her shoulders. "Sorry," She mumbles. Celeste sits up fully to pull her phone out of her back pocket. Her eyes widened quickly when she realized just how many texts and calls she missed from her mother. Thirty two texts and sixteen calls. That's a new record. And four emails? That's new.

"I'm taking that look means a lot," Zoe grumbles again, out of all of Celeste's friends Zoe has the least patience for Celeste's obsession.

“Come on, let’s go. You’ve watched the meteor shower we’re all exhausted. Let’s get back to the city,” Luca tells her, offering his hand out. Celeste smiles at him and takes it. Luca pulls her up.

“Goodnight sky,” Celeste whispers, “It’s a shame we have to go back but I guess we should.” Luca just nods and starts to rub his eyes.

“Come on,” He mutters. Still rubbing his eyes. His eyes always shine, much like the stars that Celeste loves to stare at. A spark of guilt runs through Celeste. She feels bad when she makes her friends stay out with her just to make sure she’s safe when it’s her choice to come to a secluded graveyard. Celeste told them it was unnecessary. Celeste’s mother told them it was. They were more scared of her mother. 

The trio makes their way back to where Luca parked his truck. Luca was the only one there that parent’s let have a car so he was the unofficial driver of the group. Luca gives a large yawn. The trek through the graveyard isn’t that long so they reach where the truck was parked rather quickly. 

By the time they all clamber in, Celeste in the back while the other two sit up front, the clock reads one thirty. Celeste pulls out her phone to send a quick text to her mom. 

Heading home

It’s not much. Celeste didn’t see the need to write out a whole paragraph. Her mom knew Celeste loses track of time. 

Thank you. Responding a bit sooner might be nice next time. See you soon.

Her mom was a much thoughtful texter. Celeste laughs sheepishly and slightly embarrassed. She doesn’t bother responding at this point. She’s heading home. That’s all that matters. Her mom and her aren’t overly close. Her mom tried but she never expected to be a single mother. She struggled a lot and that caused a huge riffed between them. 

Luca starts the engine, a cracking and very concerning noise. The car is most likely older than all of them… combined. The radio is static at first but after a little fidgeting from Luca dials into a classical music channel. 

“Ah nah, we are not listening to classical. I will pass out at the wheel,” Luca immediately protests. He keeps fiddling with the stations but all they get is static and the one classical station. 

“It’s the only thing we got unless you don’t want to listen to music,” Zoe grumbles readjusting her seatbelt so she can use it as a pillow. Luca sighs and internally debates. He finally decides even classical music is better than no music or static. 

“This is why we shouldn’t go to the middle of nowhere, they don’t have good stations,” Luca complains, putting the car in gear. 

Luca pulls out of the parking and onto the road back to the city when Celeste mumbles, “Sorry.” 

“It’s fine,” He mumbles. Luca could never hold himself to be mad at her, especially when he takes her stargazing. Just watching her fall in love with every star she sees is as mesmerizing as the stars are to her. He glances at her sitting behind him in the rearview mirror. She’s watching the outside of the car. 

Most likely trying to catch a last glimpse of the stars through the trees. Luca chuckles slightly and shakes his head but returns his eyes to the road. 

Zoe falls quickly asleep. Her arms wrapped around the seatbelt to act as a pillow. Celeste stays awake but quiet the whole time. She stays quiet though, looking out the window. The stars aren’t visible but just looking into the darkness is still peaceful for Celeste, the great mystery of it all. 

Luca’s head dips for a little bit, but he quickly snaps himself awake. 

“You good?” Celeste questions. Her voice is soft, and Luca barely hears it.  

“Yeah,” Luca reassures her. Celeste settles back down into her seat. 

“Mmm kay,” She mumbles her eyes drooping. 

Luca smiles weakly. His eyes start to droop as well. Then his head.

“No,” He tells himself sternly, slapping himself across the face. 

Light.

Bright White Light. 

Noise. 

Something. Honking.

Who’s honking. 

All three people in the car sit up in their seat. 

Slamming. 

All three people surge forward. 

Screaming.

Where’s that coming from?

Zoe. Zoe’s screaming. 

Crunch. 

Flip.

Flip. 

Flip.

Pain.

Red. 

No breath.

Fading.

“Lest, get out of the car. Now!” Celeste hears a deep voice yell, snapping her back to reality. 

The car is on it’s top with Celeste smashed in between her chair and roof. The door weakly opens. A boy is laying on the other side, weakly holding his hand out for her. Lucas, Luke? No, Luca, he’s nice. Celeste remembers him. Warmth spreads through her chest. 

Or is it on her side. Why is her side so warm? 

“Celeste, come on, get out,” Luca begs. There’s red on his face. His face is pale with fear, or is it bloodlost. 

Celeste grabs his hand and tries to get out of the cab. He tugs but it is weak. There’s no pain. Isn’t there supposed to be pain in a car crash. Everything is foggy. 

A second person comes running over. This time a girl. 

“Come on Celeste, Luca,” The girl yells. Panic surging into her voice. Zoe. Zoe doesn’t like going with Celeste to these things. She always wants to sleep. Why is she worried about Celeste. Celeste is the reason she was out there and awake. Celeste is the reason for all of this. 

The car let’s go of Celeste, or was it Zoe that dragged her completely out? Celeste is next to Luca. How did she get here? There’s pressure on her side, her leg.

“Oh Celeste, please. Come on,” Zoe begs.

“Are you okay?” A deep voice hollers.

“Yes,” Zoe screams back, “Did you call 911?” 

A man drops down next to Luca. He starts holding a ripped shirt to Luca’s head. It was soaked to red in seconds. Was he bleeding? Is Celeste bleeding?

The stars. The stars are beautiful. She wonders if she’s dying. Would she become a star once she dies like all those stories? Will the Earth be able to see the star in a year? One hundred years? One thousand years?

“Zoe,” Celeste croaks, lifting a weak hand to clutch Zoe’s arm. Zoe is shocked by how tight her fingers curl around her wrist. “Can you tell my mother I love her? And that I’m sorry.”

“You can tell her yourself,” Zoe insists, “Just focus on breathing.”

A small laugh breaks through Celeste lips. “Everyone said I lived like my father. Always staring at stars. Ironic that I’ll die like him.”

“No,” Zoe says. There’s something shiny slipping down her cheeks. They hit Celeste’s face. They’re salty. 

A hand grabs Celeste’s. It’s weak. Celeste’s head rolls to see Luca laying next to her. On the concrete beneath the sky.

“I love you, Lest,” He tells her. His voice was full of earnestness and fear. 

Now, Celeste has something dripping from her eyes.

“I love you too,” She mumbles. It’s funny. His eyes don’t close. Not like the movies. They don’t explode either like the stars his eyes used to look like, either. 

It looks like he was just staring. A glossy look in his eyes. His skin is still warm where Celeste clutches his hand. The light that made them stars… it has just disappeared. 

Celeste turns her head. Unable to look at the boy that she only realized she loved. She looks at the stars. 

There’s a faint noise coming from her side. Celeste can’t hear it much. She doesn’t want to. 

There was someone leaning over her. She can’t see them much. She doesn’t want to. 

“I’m sorry,” She whispers. She doesn’t understand why. It just seems right. As soon as those words pass her lips she understands why she said them. Something is lifted off her. A weight. 

Now she can enjoy the stars in peace. As stars are meant to be enjoyed.

As she’s lying there she sees a new star. She’s never noticed it before. She feels like she should have seen it, like she spent time staring up at the stars. Like the stars were important, at least to her. Especially this one. 

It’s funny how dying can reveal things that people never know when living. Love. What matters. Stars. 

Star's are more than just a star. Some stars are suns in the middle of the solar system. Some of those suns provide life and burning heat for the hunks of the rock that surround them. Some stars join together to create beautiful constellations. Some of those constellations helped to create the most beautiful and tragic religions and stories. Even stories of humans becoming stars. Throughout all of human existence, stars have been there. Maybe different stars, for all humans know, a star they look up to every night is no longer there and stars they've never seen have already been born. It's a shame that it's so hard to see a truly starry night sky anymore.

At least, that's what Celeste always thought.

“Hi, dad.”