I ran to my room as fast as I could. I slammed the door behind me. I couldn’t let Victoria see me cry. Ever since my mother had died I had tried to hide myself from my family. No, not my family, something different. My step-family. In this family I was an other. I pulled an old family album from under my bed. I opened to the first page. A picture of my parents took up the entire page. My mom with her long blond hair stood next to my dad with brown hair, my mom in her white wedding dress. My dad stood next her in a tuxedo but his messy brown hair looked like it hadn’t been brushed. My dad… my real dad. Not some rich guy my mom had married after meeting him on a train. I flipped through the rest of the album, my fingers tracing my parents' faces. I lingered on the last photo. My eight year old self was staring straight at the camera, my mom smiling and scolding my father, and my dad who was laughing and giving us both bunny ears. I closed the album and tucked it at the bottom of my overnight bag. I remembered why my door was closed and why I had looked at the album which I did when I was mad or upset. I clenched my fists and took one, two, three deep breaths. My mom had told me to do that when I was mad. I did it a lot. My hands shook as I packed my things. When the bag was full I zippered it closed and crawled into my bed. I don’t know how long I was asleep, but when I woke up the sun was streaming through the window and the smell of pancakes wafted through my still closed door. My bare feet shuffled down the stairs and into the kitchen. Monica, the chef, was serving pancakes to my step-sisters. Lily, my six year old step-sister giggled as she drowned her pancakes in maple syrup. I sat down and did the same. That is one thing we have in common, we both love maple syrup. When Monica served the fluffy, fresh from the griddle pancake-y goodness to Victoria she slapped a piece of butter on it and ate it. Without syrup. And I thought I was strange. I wolfed down the rest. I took a bite of the pancakes. A chocolatey goo was in it. Chocolate chip pancakes, Yes I thought to myself. As I excused myself I heard Victoria mutter something about me being a pig. I ran to my room on the third floor. I sat on my bed and read until about 10:00. Then Kevin called me down. I grabbed my stuff and slowly walked down the stairs and out the door. The summer heat blasted my face as soon as I was out of the protection of the wonderful air conditioning. “Amber hurry up!” Kevin shouted from the limo at the bottom of the grassy hill. My step-father had just ruined my summer. I was not about to make life easier for him. I shuffled down the hill. Halfway down my foot caught on a rock and I went tumbling down. At the bottom of the hill I stood up and gathered my things. Kevin’s mouth tightened as he took in the grass stains on my shirt and leggings. I smiled. Disappointing my step-father was my favorite hobby in the whole world, even more than watching YouTubes about zodiacs with my friend, Alexandra. I climbed into the limo and buckled my seatbelt. “Where to Master Kevin?” The chauffeur Charlie asked. I gritted my teeth when Charlie said Master Kevin. My step-dad was no master, except at ruining my life. “Camp Hartford.” He put my bag next to me and closed the door. Charlie pulled the car onto the main road and we rode in silence. About halfway through the car ride Charlie turned on the radio. I heard the words You betrayed me. '' I muttered ,“And I know that you’ll never feel sorry,” I felt that way after Kevin had sent me away to Camp Hartford. “The way I saw that you talked to her, when we were together you gave me your word, guess that didn’t matter, it took you two weeks to go out and date her... ” About one hour later we arrived at the sleepaway camp that had ruined my plans to do nothing but watch YouTube with Alex all summer. I thanked Charlie and climbed out of the car. I checked in at the office and walked to my cabin. I saw a top bunk that was open and threw my bag on it. As I climbed on, a girl with red hair twisted into a braid walked in. She took the bunk under me and pulled out her phone and earbuds. “Hi!” She said. “Hi.” I said, a little nervous. I had only ever had one friend, Alexandra Pezar. “Come down here!” She said. I walked down the ladder. “Do you like Olivia Rodrigo?” She asked. I nodded. “Me too. I can’t stop watching videos on YouTube. I’m a little too obsessed. I’m Meghan by the way.” She smiled. “Amber.” I replied, returning her smile. “Wanna watch the Driver's License video?” I nodded. She turned up the volume and we both belted out the lyrics: “I got my driver’s license last week just like we always talked about, ‘Cause you were so excited for me to finally drive up to your house…” Me and Meg became friends really quickly and on the last week of camp we decided to enter the talent show. She would be Olivia Rodrigo and I would be her ex. Meg would sing Good 4 u and I would interrupt. On show night I dressed in ripped jeans and a black rock t-shirt. Meg dressed in a shimmery dress and white leggings. We stood behind the curtains giggling and watching the other acts. Then the head counselor's voice boomed in the warm summer air. “Thank you Patrick and Maya! Next up for our final act of the night… Amber and Meghan performing Good 4 u with interruptions!” We walked on stage. The music started. “Good 4 u I guess you moved on really easily…” Meghan sang. “ I did.” I said. “You found a new girl and it only took a couple weeks…” I grinned a weird little grin and made a check thing under my chin like they do on t.v. “It did.” I said and nodded slowly. “Remember when you said you wanted to give me the worrrrrrlllllldddd?” She was a really good actress, she actually sounded heartbroken. I grinned excited for my next and favorite line. “Did I say that?” I smiled. I actually sounded confused. After the act there was so much laughter and applause I almost didn’t realize that my step-family was standing at the edge of the audience. For once Victoria wasn’t on her phone and Lily stood there staring at her feet. Kevin was in a business suit and on his phone and not even looking at me. I excused myself from our fans and Meg seemed happy to have the spotlight on her. I walked over to my step-sisters and step-father. “You were amazing Amber.” Victoria said, smiling at me. My jaw dropped. That was the nicest thing my sister had ever said. Lily started singing Good 4 u; “I lost my mind, I spent the night crying on the floor of my bathroom, well too bad for you!” Victoria and I looked at each other and laughed. Lily had mixed up Meg’s line and my line. Half an hour later after me and Meghan had traded phone numbers I got into the limo and as we drove away I was happy for the first time in what felt like forever. When we got home I said “I want to go back next year, Lily you should come too!” then Victoria walked in the room and was crying so much I thought the room was going to flood. She then said “David broke up with me for no reason!”
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Great use of tight and lean sentences. Some white space would help distinguish between jumps in time, but the story also moves at a quick clip, which is good for keeping attention.
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