Small Talk

Polite Talk.

Small Talk.

Is a kind of service to others.

To establish and maintain social relationships

The ability to engage in small talk is and can be an important life skill. It serves a pragmatic sense of regard for others. An interest in their existence. For example, exchanges of social pleasantries that do not seek or offer information of intrinsic value but rather signal a willingness to observe conventional local expectations for politeness. (wk)

Can you image a politeness competition?🙂 Wherein the two sides engaged in non stop polite words to each other. What kind of world might we create?……A good world. A bad world? A jaded world?

As with anything in life, small talk can also have a negative side—a “drop the bomb” and walk away, hang up the phone or become “cancelled”. A form of bullying.

In speech communication, where it is called “grooming” talking, in Roman Jakobson’s work, the phatic function of language concerns the channel of communication.

The channel of communication.

For example, when one says, “I can’t hear you, you’re breaking up” in the middle of a cell-phone conversation. This usage appears in research on online communities and micro-blogging.(wk)

Micro-blogging is a young persons version of connection. A way to communicate with the outside world. One must be careful with this at all times. Privacy issues and your security may be at risk.

There is a whole big world “out there” beyond the screen you hold in you hand in front of your beautiful face. Your beautiful eyes.

Why? Be careful? You ask. No one can hurt me.

This may not be true.

You may release sensitive thoughts and information of your day, your personal personally held thoughts, your world. And may not even know it. This is not intended to frighten you. Sometimes the adults in our lives are very, very busy and forget to tell us the right and wrongs ways to “share”. Of ourselves.

Judgments abound on the information super highway and can be carried from place to place to place to place to place and you do not have the right to be left behind as the person who needed a place of safety in and of yourself.

A harder truth of life is feeling unwelcomed. Some folks choose to blame when they do not understand. And that can be a quite a difficult existence. There are others who may share your point of view.

What to do?

Talk. Yes. Talk. To a trusted adult.

Small talk is also gossip talk. Bully talk. Mean talk. And once it crosses the beautiful eyes while making a connection, true understanding may be lost. Finding self in a “group”, chat group of like-minded individuals “trash” talking one another. May nor be great.

Trash talk is also small talk.

It is very easy to become blind to its engagement. Very easy.

Vulnerability is within all of us. Some folks go right to the blame game and refuse to understand the deeper meanings of you.

They are blind. They become blind. Maybe they just forgot to be good and kind. Either way. Jesus enters the spirit, and if you listen very carefully, he will not judge. Their actions. Their reactions. Their fear. Their tepid hearts. He will not blame the parents as in they did the wrong thing. He takes note of the fact that blindness can come in many ways, shapes, and forms.

He takes it upon Himself to help us see.

He did so with one man. Jesus rubbed mud on a blind man’s eyes. And then the blind man was blind no more. Other towns people who saw this mystery unfold were skeptical and began speaking ill of the man—blaming his parents for his shortcomings, his inability to see.

You see.

It is not quite that simple. And micro blogging will not provide you the answer of connection. A trusted adult, an honest friend, a belief in Jesus, a belief in a higher order will help you see the things and most of all be better able to handle the challenges and difficulties that life brings into your life.

There is no need to feel

Blocked. Cancelled. Abandoned.

When healing takes place reactions take place (pf). Reactions may be harsh in your direction. Because it is unacceptable for others to leave things like before. It takes courage to invite the difficult conversation, to ask more demanding questions.

Heck. We all get embarrassed from time to time. That is normal. However to be groomed into an existence wherein doubting yourself becomes the norm is not good, honest or health of mind.

Some folks think that before the blind man could see, that he “deserved it”. Oftentimes, these thinkers have a vengeful heart. Enjoy seeing others hurt.

It feeds their own pain.

That is no way to live.

Pray for these kinds of vengeful people.

Even if and when they come after you.

Let courage be your guide.

Do not be blind to their hurts.

Do not let their vengeful hearts hurt you.

The right of your life is your right to your dignity. Dignity comes from deep within the heart. (pf) A tepid heart…may be undecided. Bitterness of marginalization can turn small talk very quickly into hurtful talk, hurtful speeches, propagandized in a way that becomes very difficult to understand. What is true? What is false? Who do I believe. Which “chat room” shall I join? The one that makes me feel best, agrees with my vulnerability so as to commiserate?

Or the trusted adult who will help me with my fears. And help me learn to accept myself and my circumstances of who I am and what they are? Prejudice is a part of life, however it can escalate into very difficult matters. Do not join the bandwagon.

People are people so why should it be you and I can get along so awfully? It should not be awful. Ever. With anyone. And if it becomes so, seek the help of a trusted adult. No matter the language we speak, we can build a strong heart of regard for our fellow man. No matter what the circumstances.

Be grateful.

Love first.

Judge last.

In John 9, the message speaks of sticking with your beliefs even if and when it may not be popular. Not “likeable”. Jesus seeks to open our own eyes and throw away our own judgment. Do not be the vengeful person. Be the strong person, who accepts and welcomes.

You may be cast out of the “group” out of the “club”. Out of the “chat”.

And.

It may be the best possible thing to happen to you.

Really.

Jesus said to the doubters, the questioners:

”Are we also blind?” Jesus said to them, “If you were blind, you would have no guilt; but now that you say, “We see”, your guilt remains.

”You have seen Him and he is speaking to you”. He said.

If you speak be it kind, gentle words. We never know what is going on in the life of another. Why add to their angst? Some folks remain in this pattern of blindness. However once you step out of its insidious hold on you. You will welcome a person into a new world of happiness and gentleness that they can then share with another.

There is no such thing as a small act of kindness.

There is a small talk that connects and engages the good.

Resist the “chat rooms” of small characters grooming you to say and communicate things you do not believe.