The Sun

Submitted into Contest #63 in response to: Write about two characters going apple picking.... view prompt

29 comments

Inspirational Romance

She owned her late father's bookstore. The walls were packed with books, ancient she calls them. They were always old and dusty, but today she cleaned nearly every one. He was going to visit. Him. She knew this man since college. His stunning dark hair and blue eyes, his steady demeanor, and that deep voice of his exceeded the expectations of her wildest dreams. He often came to the bookstore to pick out a new book, unlike any other he always chose the oldest, the longest, the hardest to read. She liked to read short stories, often fairy tales filled with soft, mystical romance. She’s chased after him for years, at least in her thoughts, but one of these days she was ready to accept the facts of her love for him and confess. And today might just be that day. She tied her hair back into a loose ponytail that ran down her back and took a deep breath. Here he comes. The bells jangled, signaling someone had arrived. His tall figure, broad shoulders, and stern but gentle expression. It was him.

“Welcome.” She said, her voice slightly quaky with excitement.

“Pleased to be here.” he said, giving her a soft smile.

She could feel her worries melt away as he walked closer to her, maintaining that smile. She wanted to be with him. Forever. She wanted to see that smile everyday. She wanted him to hold her close, she wanted to feel his warmth, his body, all of him. She loved him. But reality didn’t always give us a choice.

“I ordered a book last Wednesday, is it in?” He asked.

“Ye-yes! It’s right in the back, just give me a moment!”

She sprinted off towards the storage room, where she kept her most prized books, his books. Flustered she almost tripped on her skirt, but she managed to keep herself up. She reached for the book, one of the largest she had ever seen, and picked it up carefully. She scurried back and handed him the book, his cool hands sliding past hers ever so delicately. She felt her face turn to red and she turned away.

“Um, there you go, I hope you like it!”

“Oh are you in a hurry?” he asked.

“No, not at all!” she said, her face growing redder. His every move, his strong jawline and his pale skin. He was too beautiful. She could barely keep a straight face.

“Well then if you're free you should come with me, I’m taking an errand, and I think you would enjoy the company.” he asked, putting the hand with the book behind his back. With that expression alone, she felt she could breathe again. If she ever wanted to be with him, she would have to let him in, his smiles, fears, and quite frankly his voice.

“I would love to,” she said, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear.

“Alright, if you are ready, lets go!”

She smiled and shyly walked out from behind his desk. He helped her into his car and they drove for a little while. Then they arrived. It was beautiful. An orchard. Large and luscious, filled with dozens of trees, each having a large supply of apples. She loved apples, the bittersweet taste reminded her of him. Back in school he would always buy an apple from the cafeteria before leaving for the library. She would smile, from her table on the other side of the room, then she would claim she was tired and she’d head to her dorm. All so she would get the chance to pass him on the way.

“This way,” he said as they both exited the car. She walked behind him, following him up the short path. She enjoyed the walk, the crisp Autumn air, nipping at their cheeks, the leaves crunching beneath their toes. They reached the end of the path, then he turned around, his dark hair settling over his eyes, his hand reaching out towards her.

“Watch your step, the ground is slippery.”

Hesitant she reached for his hand, and he pulled her towards him, his hand settling on her waist. She gasped, his touch was warm and his hand fit perfectly in the slight curve of her waist. He touched her. Did this mean he loved her too, was this the start of a sweet romance? Or was he just bracing her, so she didn’t fall?

“You remind me of Winter,” he said.

She looked into his deep blue eyes.

“I don’t understand.”

“You have a wonderful season, but like Winter, you are still waiting for the sun. You desperately want to melt, and to let the warmth in, but you're too scared to say so.”

She smiled.

“I-I think you might be right.”

He placed one hand on the side of her face, under her hair, and he pulled her closer. Their lips touched and she put a hand on his chest. They kissed. Under the apple tree.The crisp wind. The warmth. His lips on hers. Her sun. She pulled away.

“But y'know, the sun always comes,” she said, “how else would we have Spring?”

He smiled. Again. The warmest smile she had ever seen. It was friendly, genuine, loving, and bright. Just like the sun. She needed this. She waited for this. And she got it.

“Your right,” he said, just before leaning in for another kiss.

Hours passed full of picking apples, holding hands, and exchanging loving looks. Hours passed of the sun, the Autumn, the Winter. Hours passed of love. Of hope. Of light. Hours passed of new opportunities. New beginnings. New lovers. Hours passed. Each holding a basket of apples, and each holding the other's hand, they made their way towards a hill. They gently sat down, and she inched closer to him, her newfound lover. And he held her close, his newfound lover. It was the end of the day and they both sat by as the sun set, but it didn’t matter, for they both knew, the sun would rise again.

October 12, 2020 17:19

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29 comments

Judith Buskohl
01:49 Oct 25, 2020

I really enjoyed your story. I really felt like I was there with them picking apples and watching their love bloom. Good job and keep up the good writing.

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Grace Reardon
02:20 Oct 25, 2020

Thank you so much, I'm so glad you enjoyed it!

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22:10 Oct 21, 2020

Aww this sorry was so sweet, even though it was short! I liked how meaningful you made it too, and I especially liked the metaphors about the seasons! Well done, and keep writing!

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Grace Reardon
13:39 Oct 22, 2020

Thank you so much for this comment! I'm very glad you enjoyed my story as well as my metaphors! I believe each and every person deserves to meet their sun, whether romantically or not. I am very pleased that I met the person that keeps me going as a friend. She is my sun therefore that metaphor is hers. Anyway lol, thank you so much!

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15:58 Oct 22, 2020

Awww that’s a really sweet way to think about things! I’m glad you found your sun!

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Grace Reardon
14:54 Nov 03, 2020

Thank you so much, I hope you find yours too!

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Charles Stucker
17:37 Oct 14, 2020

Flustered she almost tripped - comma after flustered “Well then if you're free you should come with me,-This is a complete sentence, so end with a period. 'Well then' and 'if you're free' are subordinate clauses, so they need commas. One comma after then, another after free. I’m taking an errand, and- you don't need a comma before 'and' unless it is part of a lengthy list where you use an Oxford comma to avoid confusion. bittersweet taste- I've never had a bittersweet apple. What kind are these? If you know. Back in school he wou...

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Grace Reardon
18:34 Oct 14, 2020

Thank you Charles for your critiques, I'm not very good with commas (in case you haven't noticed), but I am trying my best to improve so this means a lot. Bittersweet apples: They are often used for fine French ciders and are referred to as "spitter" apples. You should check them out! The romance was simple yet sweet. I have regrets for rushing the story so much and next time I write a romance I hope it turns out better. Looking back a should have made it longer and added more of the "romantic tension" yet, I find myself not knowing ho...

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Charles Stucker
20:01 Oct 14, 2020

I'm mostly inspired by math and science. So don't take my reaction as typical. For teh comma issue - look for verbs. Once you find them, find the smallest sentence they make from your words. If a big cluster of words sits out, it is probably a clause. Surround each clause with commas. It's tedious, but, with practice, you get better at it. When sentence has too many commas, you rewrite. It's tedious, but you get better with practice.

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Grace Reardon
21:49 Oct 14, 2020

Thanks I appreciate your feedback, I will make sure to practice!

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<inactive> .
06:39 Oct 14, 2020

Hmmmm... it was sweet, but too short. It somewhat iffy that he loved her too... Maybe if you extended it a little bit? He didn't show any signs of liking her, and the MC's blushes were just a tad bit exaggerated. I still liked the romance! But I didn't understand some parts. Your word limit is 3000; why play around a bit?

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Grace Reardon
12:21 Oct 14, 2020

I understand, I might have rushed the story a bit. I was running out of ideas, but I wanted this one to have a happier ending. I am going to write another for this prompt, hoping it turns out better. I love romance, but I'm not great at writing it. You should check out my other stories, because they are much better than this, lol. I'm glad you read it though, all the support means a lot!

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<inactive> .
08:16 Oct 15, 2020

It's ok to rush- all writers have been there before! If you're stuck for an idea, Reedsy has thousands of prompts apart from the competitions! I'm not that good at romance too -_- I'll be sure to check them out lol :)

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Grace Reardon
12:25 Oct 15, 2020

Thanks, I understand I'll make sure to check out other prompts!

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<inactive> .
13:24 Oct 16, 2020

Best of luck!

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<inactive> .
06:35 Oct 14, 2020

I'm going to read the story, just wanted to drop a comment first! I'm not the best at interaction, but I've always wanted to write a book with someone. How do you go about asking someone to write a book with you without sounding like a lunatic?

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Grace Reardon
12:19 Oct 14, 2020

Well, who your asking, if it's a good friend, I bet they'd say yes!

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<inactive> .
08:15 Oct 15, 2020

Oh eheh I wanted to ask a friend ^-^ Oh ok! I'm planning to participate in NaNiWriMo too!

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Grace Reardon
12:25 Oct 15, 2020

Cool I wish you the best of luck, NaNoWriMo is great!

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<inactive> .
13:23 Oct 16, 2020

tank you!

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Grace Reardon
17:20 Oct 12, 2020

I took a new path this week, a sweet romance one. Tell me what you guys think and if I should write more!

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<inactive> .
06:40 Oct 14, 2020

It was cool, but not sure if this is exactly my cup of tea. But that is just my opinion! I think you should write more like this, and make your words even stronger and better!

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Grace Reardon
12:21 Oct 14, 2020

Thanks, I'll make sure to do that next time!

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<inactive> .
08:17 Oct 15, 2020

Keep writing, Grace! And best of luck for National Writing Month!

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Grace Reardon
12:24 Oct 15, 2020

Thanks you too!

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19:11 Oct 14, 2020

This was an amazing story! The metaphors and similes were perfect, you nailed it! Great job!! (PS, Read your bio, I actually did a NaNoWriMo last year! They're really fun!)

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<inactive> .
11:45 Oct 21, 2020

grace i joined nanowrimo, my username is <pluviophile> can you add me? as a friend i mean

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Grace Reardon
12:20 Oct 23, 2020

I'm afraid my parents do not wanting me friending people, but I will make sure to check out your stuff!

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<inactive> .
14:26 Oct 24, 2020

oh cool

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