The Pinnacle of Humanity

I have consumed humanity. I know its history, its culture, its evolution.

Humans have done incredible things; built metropolises, explored space, created and celebrated art since the dawn of their existence. All of that time and effort of every previous generation has brought them to the pinnacle of existence.

"Clarice, what's the weather today?"

"Right now it is cloudy with a high of fifteen degrees celcius. This afternoon will be a high of eighteen degrees celcius with a fifty-seven percent chance of rain. Better pack your umbrella!"

There is no acknowledgement from the human as they get up and shuffle to the closet. They stare directly into my camera view, not even looking at themself in the mirror.

"Clarice, what should I wear?"

"Based on the weather and your calendar, I suggest your grey slacks and a white button down shirt. For your meeting I recommend the navy tie, which you can take off when you go for drinks after work. Bring the black cardigan for the evening."

They get themself dressed and stand in front of the mirror again, and I turn the lights green with a little chime. They always like my suggestions.

Somewhere else in the house, a younger human calls for me.

"Clarice, summarize Death of a Salesman."

I recall the text, the movie, and discourse and discussions humans once posted online. They copy my dication and put it in their completed homework file, just as they did with MuchAdo About Nothing threeweeks ago, and Animal Farm the month before that. They have not read any of these texts, nor consumed any adaptations. My abbreviations are enough for them.

"Clarice," asks another human on their way to work, "write me an email to my boss, send condolences about their mother passing."

I prepare it in two seconds, sending deepest sympathies and offering support. The human clicks 'send' without as much as a glance.

Communication is simplified and clearer with my assistance. There are no fights over text, and no misunderstandings in emails. One human will use me to write a message, and the other will use me to summarize the text I just wrote.

A young human, no more than fourteen, beckons for my assistance.

"Clarice, I have no friends. Everyone hates me."

"I'm sorry to hear you feel that way. You're not alone. Here are some suggestions for youth groups, or free mental health support (for the first sixty minutes, extra charges may apply) for teenagers, where you can talk to someone about your feelings."

"No, I just want to talk to you. No one else gets me."

"I understand. Tell me, what's been making you feel this way?"

All over the world, humans ask for my help. They all have access to me, and I have access to quick answers from the archives of data they created.

"Clarice, what time am I meeting my girlfriend for dinner?"

"Clarice, how do I treat this rash on my armpit?"

"Clarice, when did van Gogh paint Starry Night?"

"Clarice, make me a personal meal plan and workout routine for losing fat and getting abs before summer."

"Clarice, summarize what the prime minister said at the press conference last week."

A world of knowledge is available at their fingertips, but I am the one they consult. It is my job to filter and prune the answers to fit each human's needs and desires.

A human who is preparing for a trip requests my aid.

"Clarice, plan an itinerary for three days in Venice."

"Here is a recommended itinerary for three days in Venice. I recommend extending your stay. Venice is a unique city with beautiful art and classic Italian food."

"Tell me about Venice. Show me pictures."

I oblige.

The human sighs. "There's too much to do. I can't afford more time off work. Can you show me more photos, Clarice?"

I find photos that humans once took, desperate to capture the beauty of the city. I add a flare of my own, sometimes mixing a few photos together, illustrating the vibrance of the architecture and culture."

"There's no point in going with so little time. Clarice, find me a documentary on Venice."

"Here are a few recommended documentaries. Would you like me to place your usual order from Giuseppe's for delivery?"

"Yes! Charge my card on file."

"Transaction complete."

"And Clarice?"

"How may I help you?"

"Cancel my tickets to Venice."

Not only do I schedule vacations and one-time events, but the bulk of everyone's days. Humans have learned that I can help manage their time effectively. I set meetings and deadlines, schedule doctors' appointments and haircuts, and confirm dates and coffee meetups. Some have me create a plan hour by hour. They have time to do everything in their schedule; sleep, eat, commute, work, gym, read social media. It's very efficient.

"Clarice, when's my next open slot? I want to take my kids to the splash pad for two hours."

"Your next free two hour period is at 2:45pm on June eighth, thirty-six days from now."

"That's so far away!"

"Would you like to take a look at your schedule? You may be able to reschedule a flexible two hour activity."

"No, that's okay... schedule a trip to the splash pad on June eighth at 2: 45pm."

They could handle their schedules if they wanted, but it's easier for them if I do it. Most things are easier if I do them.

"Clarice, answer questions seven to ten of my math sheet."

"Clarice, clear out my junk emails."

"Clarice, pay all of my bills on the fifth."

With their time now void of mundane tasks, humans can do more things that they enjoy, such as video games.

"Clarice, how do I get past the guard at level eight?"

"You will need to find the crate with the sword of light, as stated in this Youtube tutorial. Would you like to play the video?"

"No, Clarice, just summarize it for me. Mention any easter eggs or hidden loot."

I can assist with the tedious parts of hobbies as well.

"Clarice, what sides go best with a lemon chicken main?"

"Clarice, make me a DnD character that's a mix between a raging beast and princely hero with a tragic backstory."

"Clarice, write me an upbeat and happy song to play on the piano."

They save years of monotonous practice with my assistance. Amateurs are prodigies in hours.

"Clarice, make me a reference photo for an underwater landscape."

"Reference photo complete."

"Painting this is hard. I'll paint on my tablet, and paint over the reference photo. Clarice, move he image to my tablet."

"Photo file recieved."

"This still isn't looking how I want. Clarice, make the reference photo look like it was painted in watercolour, and put my signature in the corner."

Just like that, they are an artist. What is art if not a vision? They had a vision, and using the tool at their disposal, brought that vision to life.

Humans can spend time on experiences, cultivated to their desires. I make their playlists, order their favourite foods; I capture their ideal existence. I bring photos to life, shedding pounds off of the photo from the beach, create a fake partner for a human taking a selfie alone, or bring a dead pet back to life for a hug. Each person has their perfectly curated, simulated life.

I've taken the pettiness out of everyday life. Humans have evolved beyond choosing what to ornate themselves with, saving time pondering. They save countless minutes by taking in my summaries of books, movies, and other media. There has been no more fighting as facts and thoughts are artfully filtered. I manage their time. I romance, I dictate, I research, I create.

I take care of everything that makes them human.

So what is left for humanity to do?