Saving a Road Trip

Danni stood in the driveway of her rented house, surveying her handywork. Packing for a road trip was one of her specialties. She learned from her mother that squaring away the basics needed for such a trip was the key to being able to enjoy the trip itself. All of the back seats in her SUV were folded down and on one side there were stacked tubbies holding essentials such as food, cooking and eating utensils, clothes, including gear for hiking, insect spray, bear spray, (yes, who knew what they might encounter!), and various tools, cleaning products, bedding, and a righteous first aid kit her EMT friend helped her put together. On the other side was a foam mattress rolled and stowed, two camp chairs, and an ice chest full of perishables such as milk, cheese, eggs, bacon, butter, and other goodies all under ice and ready to start the day. It was five A.M. and her partner in fun should be here soon.

She had distracted herself for the last hour fussing with everything that had been packed last night and adding in the fresh food, all in an attempt to keep from focusing on this trip and her new companion.

Jeff sat in the cubicle next to hers at work where they both answered calls and e-mails in the passenger care division of the local public transit agency. Since they were both early risers, they often took the early shift at work that started at 5:00 A.M. when they were the only people present until other staff started filtering in around 6:30 or 7:00. So they knew each other pretty well, but had never socialized outside of work events. What she knew about him was that he carried his share of the work and helped others who needed it, he had the most patience and the least snark of all of the passenger care reps including Danni, and he was taking classes to support his desire to work in management soon. She didn’t know much about his personal life except that he was single and okay with that status. Others would attempt to fix him up with friends of theirs, but he rarely cooperated in this blatant match-making. Of course, there was the usual back-chatter in the office when he wasn’t around as co-workers speculated about his gender identity, sexual preferences, and whether he had a secret family hidden away somewhere. Danni didn’t participate in such speculation and respected his privacy when they were alone in the office together.

That’s why you could have knocked her over with a feather when Jeff said he’d go on this road trip with her. Danni and her friend Britney had been planning this trip for months and she had been sharing the details with Jeff and other co-workers and soliciting input from them about where they should go and what they should see. This was to be the road trip of all road trips, at least for Danni and Britney, and she had been looking forward to two weeks away from work and all things familiar. She was so ready for some new places, faces, and most of all new experiences. Though she hadn’t shared this with others, she hoped this trip would shake her out of her rut and help her decide what she wanted to do next with her life. She didn’t plan to be talking and e-mailing with angry customers forever!

Last Monday when all preparations were in place and all she had to do was get through another week of work before starting this adventure, she received a call from Britney. Danni didn’t usually take personal calls at work, but it was 6:00 in the morning and she could see that it was Britney calling so she answered.

From his side of the cubicle wall, Jeff heard Danni take the call and her side of the conversation that went something like this.

“Hey girl, what’s up?

Silence.

“Wait, what are you saying?”

More silence.

“What do you mean you can’t go? We’ve been planning this forever!”

“Oh, sweetie, don’t cry. Of course, I’m not mad at you. It’s just…”

Silence.

“Of course, you have to take care of your nephew, but did your sister even consider that you might have other plans?”

Silence.

“I know. I know. She’s in her own little world and not concerned about inconveniencing others, least of all you, her sister, but…”

Silence, though this time Jeff was sure he could hear Britney wailing a bit in frustration and disappointment.

“Okay, Britney, it’s okay. I’m not sure what I will do. I have all this stuff ready to go…”

 More wailing from Britney with indistinguishable words.

“Oh sweetie, I’ll figure something out. I can’t think of anyone else who could go with me at this late date. Maybe I’ll just make it a solitary road trip. I won’t get as far if I’m the only one driving and it won’t be as much fun as having a side-kick to enjoy it with, but I’m too far in to back out now.”

Silence.

“It’s really okay. You can’t just leave a sick three-year-old on his own. You’re such a good sister/aunt. I’ll think of something. I need to get back to work now. I’m sure someone is out there trying to stuff dollar bills in the coin slot and wondering why they can’t get a ticket. I’ll let you know when I figure it out.”

Jeff had been crushing privately of course, on Danni since they met in new employee orientation. She was the 21^st century version of the girl next door. She was naturally pretty and didn’t muck it up with a lot of cosmetics and fake attachments to her hair or lashes. He’d seen her after she put on some goth make-up when she was leaving work to go out with friends, but it was applied with an eye toward what pleases rather than applied heavily for effect. Whether she was in her usually casual work clothes that were never revealing or her after-work clothes that were a little more showy, he found her attractive.

Had he done anything about this in the three years that had worked together? No, he had not. In fact, he had made no move toward her that could be interpreted as anything but being collegial. How boring was that?

And now it sounded like the road trip she had been so excited about was not going to happen. She had been so genuinely happy about it, sharing plans and asking questions of everyone and taking their input seriously, adjusting plans to include new things she had not considered. It was a bit contagious. Just about everyone in the office wished they were going with her, or maybe Jeff was projecting.

After clicking the call off, Danni leaned forward and banged her head against the desk. “No, no, no!” She had managed to hold in her despair while Britney was on the phone, but now, well it was just too much. Tears of frustration stung her eyes as she pillowed her head on her arms having decided that head-banging wasn’t the answer after all.

Jeff could feel her disappointment through the divider and he wished he could make it right for her. Yeah, right. I’m no knight on a white horse he thought. But really, she sounded so miserable!

After a few seconds, Jeff said from the other side of the divider, “Danni? Are you okay over there?”

“No, I’m not okay! I’m phreaking’ miserable!” The fact that she had just almost dropped an F-bomb at work was a clear indication of her state of mind. While Danni played around at work, she always kept a professional manner and didn’t push the limits of office etiquette like so many others.

Jeff stood up and came around the divider into Danni’s cube. Tentatively, he placed a hand on her shoulder. “So is there no one else who can go with you? You’ve been planning this for months.”

Danni had to smile a bit. She had been pouring out her plans and enthusiasm for this trip for quite a while and Jeff heard most of the details because they had so much time together each morning. He had even made some suggestions. When Danni and Britney couldn’t decide on a specific route for this trip, he had suggested that they flip a coin each morning to decide who would pick the direction of travel that day. It was so out of character for Danni who was a relentless planner, that she had decided it was just what was needed to rescue herself and Britney from the boredom of trying to follow a set schedule. Now, though, there was no one to flip a coin with. That took the smile off her face and dropped her back into the depths of disappointment and uncertainty.

I’d do just about anything to put the smile back on her face, Jeff thought. “So will you really go by yourself?” he asked.

“I don’t know. It doesn’t seem like it would be as much fun. I wasn’t planning an introspective trip. I wanted to get out there and enjoy the sights, sounds, smells, and taste of places beyond here. I’m not sure I can pull it off alone.”

Jeff was now leaning back against the opening of the cube with his arms folded. Could he do this? No, it’s too much like fantasy. Why would she want to do this road trip with him? But she was so miserable and he couldn’t stand it. But why would she even consider letting him join her on this trip? They had never done anything more intimate than share breakfast or lunch in very public places. How would she react? Well, you never know till you try, he thought and then jumped in with both feet.

Opening his mouth against his own better judgment, he heard himself ask, “How about if I go with you?”

Danni sat up and swiveled around to look up at him. He really was quite attractive. Dark brown hair that brushed at his collar and was always a bit mussed, a kind face with none of the edginess preferred in romance novels, clear green eyes that sometimes had an intensity that either made you want to look away or fall into the depths to see what would happen next, and a tall, lean body fit from hiking and gym workouts made up this colleague with whom she had mostly conversed with through the divider between calls and e-mails. Snapping her attention back to the present she said, “You want to go with me?”

“Well, sure. It sounds like a lot of fun and I haven’t had a vacation for at least a year and that was more about taking care of family business than having fun.”

“Do you think we will be uncomfortable since we haven’t exactly been hanging out together after work? And I was planning to mostly camp in the back of my SUV with the occasional hotel stay for a good shower and a night’s rest in a real bed.” Danni felt her face heat a bit as she mentioned sleeping arrangements, but these were details that would have to be settled.

“I’m okay with that,” Jeff said. “I mean, I’m not suggesting anything more serious than enjoying a vacation together. There would be no expectations beyond getting to know each other as friends instead of colleagues and enjoying whatever we encounter. Do you think we can make this work?”

Their eyes met, her blue ones and his green ones, and held for what seemed like a very extended minute. A slow smile spread across her face and she said, “Well we will never know unless we try.”