Second Choice Dad

CW: References to substance abuse

It was a surprise to everyone. Leilani, the bride to be, chose Kekoa to walk her down the aisle. How could this be? She hadn’t seen him in over fifteen years, since she was a baby girl of two who was given to Papa at a gas station, of all things. At two years old, Leilani didn’t remember Kekoa at all.

But she had an older stepsister, Maria, who did. She wanted Leilani to connect with her bio dad for purely selfish reasons, though she wouldn’t admit that even to herself, much less to her friends or family.

If she had thought seriously about it, she would have realized that it was because Leilani was prettier, smarter, and much more personable that she was and she couldn’t stand it. Also, Leilani was half Hawaiian, one of those snotty superior-than-thou races she, being Samoan, shied away from. The attitudes of most Hawaiians towards non-Hawaiians were of mere tolerance of any other races who had infiltrated their islands. Maria didn’t hate all Hawaiians; she just didn’t want to deal with the Hawaiian teenagers who acted superior to everyone else at school, and that filtered her views of all Hawaiians. She was judgmental and thought they put on a congenial, almost subservient demeanor with tourists who were willing to pay for their apparent graciousness, but Maria thought they were actually being racist.

“I think you should have your dad, Kekoa, walk you down the aisle. After all, he is your biological father and needs to be recognized. You haven’t spoken to him in over fifteen years.”

Leilani answered, “Yeah, well maybe that’s because he never looked for me. My mom gave me to Papa when I was two years old and Kekoa knew that, but he never searched for me. He even signed paperwork when I was eleven to be adopted by Papa and your Samoan mom. He never came into the courthouse to see the judge; he just signed papers on the steps outside. So, no, I don’t think I need to meet him now or have him walk me down the aisle.”

Maria stared at Leilani and said, “But, but you have to have a blood relative do it. You can’t have Papa do it. He’s white!”

“He raised me. He fed me, gave me hula lessons, and carried me home from school on his shoulders. He even ironed my dresses. What is wrong with you? You were there. He took care of you also. Also, Kekoa is part Filipino. Did you forget that?”

“Yeah, but Papa is OUR papa; you’re just adopted.”

“He’s my papa, too. He volunteered to take me in when my mom got hooked on drugs. He also volunteered to raise all of you kids when your mom got sick. An when she died, he took care of all of us together. I can’t believe you.”

Leilani leaned toward Maria to place emphasis on her next words. “You owe him your life, and you want me to insult him on my wedding day? I don’t think so!”

Leilani turned and flounced out of the room with steam coming out of her ears. She was so upset she couldn’t sit down. She paced the room. But later she thought about what Maria had said. Why not let my bio dad into my life? He found out about the wedding and sent a message that he wants to be there. I should think about it. After all, I am his oldest child even if he missed things in my childhood. Maybe we can get together now. Maybe I can have two families!

Leilani met with her dad and his new wife, with Maria in tow, at the White Sands Café in Mililani, and the conversation went well. He hugged her and treated her very respectfully. They talked about Derek’s mom inviting them to a planning party and Kekoa and his new wife said they would be there.

After the meeting, Maria said, “He’s so nice to you. You should let him be in your wedding. After all, blood is everything.” Leilani still wasn’t sure what to think. Well, Maria and I aren’t blood relatives ourselves, so what does she know?

The party was on Friday night and Papa and his second wife (the first one had passed away ten years ago) showed up with their teenage kids. Kekoa brought in a popup tent and set it up in the backyard of Derek’s mom’s house. He then proceeded to take charge of the food and discussions. Papa sat there in silence just observing the activities and the interactions of the families who were busy getting to know each other.

Derek’s mom, Eva, soon became aware that she was not in control of her own party, so she retreated to the kitchen and pretended to create a menu for the upcoming bridal shower. She was confused about who was who, and who was running everything. Apparently, Kekoa had decided he was in charge and Papa did nothing to stop him. Leilani looked around and took a seat near her stepsister. She didn’t know what else to do. At one point she looked across the table at Papa and quickly looked away in embarrassment. She didn’t know how to explain any of it to Derek.

Papa’s wife asked him, “What’s going on here? Are you not involved in your adopted daughter’s wedding? You know, the one you raised?” He just shrugged his shoulders and remained silent.

After about an hour, Maile, the younger sister of Maria, looked at Leilani and asked, “Why is Kekoa taking charge of your wedding? Why does he act so strange? Doesn’t he remember that he didn’t raise you or give you birthday or Christmas presents, or help pay for your braces, or even call you? He just went out and found, and made, another family.”

Leilani lowered her head, hesitated for a moment, and whispered to Maria, “Stay here. Don’t move. Don’t even think about talking.”

She got up and went over to Kekoa and his wife. They huddled together for about five minutes, and Kekoa walked over to the tent and took it down. He looked at his wife and said, “Let’s go. We need to leave.”

He walked towards the side gate where he stopped and turned to Leilani and loudly said, “Let us know where you want us to sit. We’ll be there on your special day.”

The group was taken aback and didn’t know how to respond. Clearly, Kekoa was not going to walk his oldest daughter down the aisle at her wedding. They looked at each other and Leilani suddenly stood up straight, sucked in her breath and spoke with newly found self-assurance.

“Of course, you and your family must sit in the first row. And when the minister asks who gives me away, I hope you will stand up and, together you and Papa will say, “We do.”

Kekoa nodded and took the tent to the car. His wife gave Leilani a big smile and a thumbs up. Papa continued to sit in silence as if he had known all along that this was how the party would to end.