This Obsessive Love

My love, my love.

I would die for you.

Even when my heart lays in tatters at your feet and the winter night feels like a blessing across my too warm skin, that you flayed open and left hanging behind. You broke me unlike any other. Brought me in and left me hollow and bleeding. That is how you showed your love, with clenched fists and harsh words. An unspoken bond between us. Flowers and gifts on feathered apologies come to light with the morning sun. Your lips pressed against mine, now cracked and bleeding, but I paint yours with the crimson of my love. Your fingerprints tattooed on my skin, a distant memory refreshed anew. You take what is freely given, that I would gladly give with gifts of silver and gold, though I only know rust. Your love is diamond crusted, sharp with a crystal clarity that belongs to the kings of old. Songs should be sung of your beauty; I will compose for you a melody only we know. A composition made with the tears I only cry for you, in every breath I take for you.

Your presence is light itself in this morning sun, that sears deep within my skin and blisters my longing for you. Without you, life is the darkened void that consumes all, an ever-lonely existence filled only with thoughts of you. Only you exist. Only you matter. Like the forest needs the dark coverage of its leaves to bring out rot deep in the ground, seeping and spreading like fire to make room for new life. An ever-changing growth that devours the trees that reach for the light. You complete me in ways I dare not comprehend, as your darkness sinks into me. I feel it taking root, taking shape into a new thing where my heart once was you have now burrowed inside. You are everything to me. Every word that I spoke is of devotion to you and the life you have given me as you suffocate me from the rays of the sun.

Tales are woven in the fabric of existence that will speak of your glory. How can I be more for you? You with godlike grace and beauty. You who breathes the wind and cries the rain. Your torrent of love upon my body in crooked marks and red letters all praising your name. I will happily carve your desire into my bones to better show my love for you, to present my heart on a bed of roses for you. What more can I do? When daylight wanes and night threatens to turn over our cause. The moon in all her beautiful wisdom knowing you will not be with me tonight. I am all I can be, but you deserve more. A worthy other to lay in our bed and breathe in the pleasure only you can give. Though knowing makes my soul pitter-patter like rain on a gravestone, sinking into the earth. A cut too deep only your love can mend me. Your sweet word like toffee sticks to the scarred parts of me. You promised me you would love me forever; through everything you would always be there for me. And I ate those sweet words like a bee to honey, knowing only you can bend and break me. Only you can make me whole after bleeding me dry.

My days filled with longing and my nights with your rage. A beautiful rage that consumes you, like a tidal wave. One that needs my body to tame from the day that pulled you in and ripped you apart like you do with my heart. The evidence of your love stained across the carpet and walls. Too little too late. My broken body now lay crumpled at your feet, as I worship the ground you walk on. I kiss the prints in the sand as proof I was in your existence. As proof that you cared for me so deeply you would have no one else touch me. I want only your caress to be the last I will ever feel. That hollowness filled with new words as dawn arises. I am left in an empty pool of sorrow when you are gone. Hoping for your return, your love to bring me to life.

You say you love me with cold looks and fractured smiles. The ice above where I lay mimics the ice in my heart waiting for you. A cold stagnant pool of broken tomorrows. Where once smiles and laughter freely reigned now but a memory of a hanging tree and a dead man’s tale. They say that death is the end, but my love, my love, for you it is infinite. As winter knows spring is just around the bend, I know in my heart you will see the truth. The trials we bear and the distance between my heart grows fonder with every passing hour. You promised me forever, so forever I will give. Here in this shallow grave, we have dug, as I await the thaw that will never come.

My love is obsessive, sharp like the blade that slits the wrists, I have drowned in the shallows of my blood that only tasted of your skin. I have been starved of you for too long, my dear, my skin pulled taut and decaying like the forest floor. My love for you like a memory runs deep into this shell I have become. Now dirt and leaves, I am nothing but the fragments that once held your name. The whispers on this snowy path lay bare forevermore. You said forever, now forever is here. I have awaited so long for you, my love. Into the dirt you will go, you have come back to me! Through the fires we will go, I will follow you down. Follow you anywhere. My last wish for you, one that will speak in tongues of the heart and burn bright and true.

My love, my love.

I would die for you.