The Terrible Thing

The surface resembles glass. It is oh so calm. Olivia has never seen water this still in her entire twenty eight years. She continues to stare out at the sea. It has her in a trance. She shivers from the cold Canadian air. Then pulls the long gray cardigan closer to her body to ward off the chill. She inhales deeply. The sweet salty air still lingers in the room.

The events from the previous day and night seem like an entire lifetime ago. Another persons slideshow that she tries to switch off. She closes her eyes. His face comes into view. His eyes how dark and ominous they always were seem to haunt her now. Olivia can recall the first time they met. She was working in the library of the local college. She worked four days a week. The job was easy and she loved it. As a young girl Olivia's nose was always in a book. There was no other job she had ever considered. She belonged with the written word.

Kevin strolled right up to her and asked for help finding a book. Olivia smiled he followed her downstairs into the non-fiction section and the rest is history. Kevin was charming, funny, clever and devilishly handsome. Olivia had always wanted to find someone that took her seriously. They went out for coffee the day after they met and soon Kevin was a regular at the library. He said all the right things and Olivia wanted to believe him.

She opens her eyes. Then pulls open the sliding glass door leading to the outside deck. Olivia walks slowly to the railing. Her eyes have not left the view of the water. Its so beautiful that she thinks about crying. But Olivia doesn't cry anymore. No now she is numb. She holds onto the railing with her right hand. She looks down at her fingers. The nails are so short from her constant chewing. She notices a purple bruise between her middle and index fingers. She lets out a long breath that she's been holding for quite sometime.

Olivia goes back inside the small cottage. She shuts and locks the back sliding doors. Then she hurries into the kitchen to look for a pair of cutting shears. She finds them inside a drawer and takes them with her to the only bathroom in the cottage. When Olivia is standing in front of the oval mirror above the pedestal sink, she pulls her long blonde hair out of the messy bun above her head. Then she stares at her reflection. She lifts the cutting shears to her hair and begins to chop away at her long locks.

When the hair is shorter than she originally planned, she grins then drops the shears into the sink. Olivia takes her fingers and tousles the short waves until she's satisfied. She hurries to the bedroom and rifles through the gym bag she brought along. Olivia finds what she was after. She pulls out the box and then sits on the edge of the twin bed. She begins to read the directions on the side of the box but her thoughts are somewhere else.

*****

Olivia pulled into her friends driveway. She drummed her fingers on the steering wheel and considered driving away. But then she thought how much she would regret not saying goodbye. On the porch she rings the bell. Annie opens the red front door and Olivia notices she is wearing gym clothes. "Olivia, hey! I wasn't expecting you. Come in, come in, I'll make us some coffee." Olivia backs up. "No, I can see your heading out." Annie takes her hand in hers and leads her toward the back of the large Victorian. "I always have time for you. You sit down and relax, while I make us some coffee." But Olivia remains standing. "Please Annie, don't. I only came to talk." Annie turns from the stove to face her friend. "Ok, are you alright?" Olivia nods.

They go into Annie's den which is directly off the kitchen. They sit side by side. "I know what I need to tell you but I have no idea where to start. This is harder than I thought." Annie touches her hand. "Are you sick? Is it something awful? You're scaring me." "No, I'm not sick. I came to say goodbye. I'm leaving, its not a trip or a vacation. You and I will never see each other again." "Olivia, what happened? Is it Kevin? Did he hurt you again?" Olivia nods. "Don't run away. That is your house too and I think if you just thought about..." "I have planned this for a very long time. I know this time will work. I saved money, I rented a car I know what I'm doing." "Do you? Because last time you said he wouldn't find you but he did. Go to the police, get a divorce you deserve to be free." "Your not listening to me. The police never help me. Only I can help me. I'm going somewhere Kevin will never think to look. Annie, just know that I love you. You were my only real friend. And promise me, no matter what he says or does, you will never tell him I was here." "Ok, I promise. Maybe I should go with you." "No! Absolutely not. I've involved you enough. Just don't say anything to anyone. Once I get settled, I will reach out but I have to go. I'm sorry, you have to know I want to stay longer but its not safe."

Annie walks her to the door. They hug. When they let go Annie is crying. "You are so brave. I wish I had done more, maybe if I stepped in before things would be different." "No, none of this is your fault. I have to go. Here, I want you to mail these for me." Olivia hands Annie two envelopes. "Try and do it today. Thank you. I'm going to miss you." "Me too. You be careful. I love you my friend." They hug again before Olivia leaves.

****

Kevin is waiting for her when she enters the house. Olivia feels her knees are about to buckle from underneath her but she refuses to fall down. "Where the hell have you been?" Kevin shouts in her face. Olivia begins to take off her winter coat as Kevin pulls her toward him. "Answer me! I asked you a question!" "There was an accident, I was stuck in traffic. I couldn't avoid it. I'll get dinner started." Olivia tries to get out of his grip but he digs in harder. "Forget dinner! You owe me an apology! How dare you come home this late!"

"Kevin, I'm sorry. I had no way to know about the car accident and I wasn't watching the time." He takes his hand off her arm. Then he continues to stare at her. "I don't like your tone. Do you think I'm an idiot? Do you!" Olivia can hear her heart start to pound in her chest. "No, not at all. I would never think that." "I think you like making me angry, I think you enjoy it!" Kevin pulls his arm back and then slaps Olivia hard enough that her ears start to ring. She takes off across the foyer and Kevin follows close behind. Olivia has her hand on the door to the laundry room she turns the knob but it won't open. Kevin comes up behind her and she screams.

"Leave me alone! Stay away from me! Stop hurting me!" Kevin slaps her again. Kevin starts to back away as Olivia holds her face. "I hate you." The words spill out before Olivia can stop them. Kevin walks towards her. "What did you say?" "You heard me. I don't love you anymore. So you can continue to punish me or you can kill me but I will never feel anything for you again!"

****

Olivia's hands are shaking. She descends the stairs on wobbly legs then opens the door to the wine cellar. Kevin is blind folded, zip tied and curled up on a cot in the corner of the room. She leans against the wall. "Olivia say something. I know your there. Let me out of this room and I'll forget everything you did." She still says nothing. "Answer me! I took care of you! I gave you everything I had, this house, your car..." "Be quiet! You don't get to yell at me anymore. Those days are over buddy. This marriage is over."

****

The timer goes off just as Olivia enters the room. She washes her hair in the kitchen sink. Then dresses in jeans and a black sweater before she blow dries her new short hair and admires the auburn color. "Hello, I'm Vanessa. Hi, my name is Vanessa. No, I've never been married." She laughs until her sides ache.

Olivia goes through the cottage with a cloth towel and wipes down every surface she touched. Then she grabs her two bags off the floor and locks the door behind her. She takes the rental car to the train station. Inside the train car she texts Annie on her new cell phone.

ON THE TRAIN. SHOULD BE IN VC BY TONIGHT.

DID U MAIL IT?

****

The detective looks down at the letter on his desk. He remembers Olivia. And he remembers her husband Kevin.

Dear Detective Murphy,

This is my confession. The system is broken. It failed to help me time and time again. I had no other choice. My marriage turned into a prison that I saw no way out. Well until I decided he would no longer hurt me. I took matters into my own hands. It was either me or him. I chose me.