Lola and the Angry Little Wasp

When I was a young child, I spent a lot of my time in this little garden. Well, it was less of a garden and more of an overrun weedy parking lot. No, that would be too generous to call it a parking lot. It was an overgrown wooded area where my father liked to park his precious yellow Lada. Don’t know what a Lada is? It’s a Russian car that went out of fashion as soon as it was in fashion because it was so poorly built in the Soviet communist times. Or that’s what my father tells the family all the time.

But it was bright yellow, and it was the first car my poor father owned, so it was parked in this wooded area, and we called it our parking lot slash play area.

The only problem with this area wasn’t that it was overgrown with weeds. It also had another problem.

But we will get to that soon enough.

On this beautiful June day, I was walking about minding my own business, when I heard something buzzing in the air around me. Buzzing things weren’t such an anomaly, but having spent so much of my childhood outside, I knew of buzzing things. They were kind of my specialty. But this buzzing thing, whatever it was, was different. It was ominous. Dangerous. I felt fear creep up my back as I heard this buzzing noise around my head.

I was as tiny as they came. It was malnutrition, or that’s what my school nurse said. That’s what she said every time I walked past her at school. She would shake her head and tsk away as she said, “Malnutrition. That’s what it is. That’s why you are still such a little runt.”

I didn’t take it as an insult, but I guess I should have. It seemed like people didn’t like being tiny. But me, I loved it.

It was easy for me to run away from bullies, to be the best player at hide and seek, and to see things that were not meant to be seen by little ones like me.

I imagined one day I would use my runtiness to make lots of money. Piles of it. And then I would always have lots of food to eat. Then I would come back to my school nurse and show her how much I have grown.

As I had these thoughts of grand endings, the buzzing thing still tried to get at me. It was trying to get into my eyes and then into my ears and then into my eyes again.

Because I was so busy swatting it away, I couldn’t see what it was. I got glimpses of it, but I still couldn’t understand. It was yellow and black. Hmmm…

Something about those colors spelled danger to my experienced garden mind.

I ran. Like the wind. As fast as my two runty legs could carry me.

I ran towards the door. But the buzzing thing wouldn’t leave me alone.

It was a wasp! I got that epiphany as if I were in a Eureka moment, and I wanted to yell out ‘Eureka’ as they do in the movies, but I had to escape first.

The door slammed shut behind me and I could see the wasp buzzing around outside the screen door. It was angry. I could tell it was angry. I don’t know how I could tell, but I knew it was waiting to bite anything that came its way. I was worried. My little brother who wasn’t as fast as me, and not as smart, would be coming in through that door soon enough.

I had to protect him. But I also had to protect myself.

How should I do this?

Somehow the image of a net hat came to me. I don’t know where it came from. But since it was in my head, I trusted it. God must have sent it, I thought to myself.

God is trying to protect me and my little brother. My father always says that God’s looking after the Hernandez family.

So, I had to find something that could be used as a netted hat. Something that could cover two little bodies.

I rummaged about in the kitchen. There was nothing there. I didn’t expect to find anything. But I knew that image of the net was from somewhere in our home. If not the kitchen, then maybe the bathroom. Nothing there. I scratched my head.

I didn’t have that much time left. My little brother would be coming home in maybe five minutes. I had to find this netted hat before he came close to that angry wasp.

Maybe I could use a bedsheet instead. But then I wouldn’t be able to see where I was walking.

A net, it would have to be.

I stood still for a moment. It was difficult for me because as my father always says to me, you are just a ball of energy, aren’t you Lola? He called me Lola, even though my real name is Lolita. I don’t know why I’m named like that, but that’s just what it is.

For a ball of energy like me to stand still was quite difficult. But I did it. I stood still, closed my eyes, and tried to imagine where the net could be. Not the kitchen. Not the bathroom. In the bedroom? But where?

The image that God sent to me was not so clear. So, I had to really think hard. It hurt my head to think this hard, but I kept on trying because I had to save my brother.

Finally, it came to me. It was underneath the baseball bats and the tennis rackets that my father and mother used in those rare moments when they weren’t fighting with each other. I ran to that part of the house. And there it was. It was a huge net.

It was what we used in the summertime when we wanted to sleep outside and watch the stars, but not get bitten to death by mosquitos.

I threw all the bats and stuff over to the side and took the net with me to the screen door.

I stood there with it, on top of my body. It seemed like a pretty good cover.

As I opened the screen door, I could see the angry wasp buzzing at me, hitting me with its tiny body, but not able to get at my skin. I tried to keep the net as far away from my body as I could because my father had told me that buzzing things have stingers that are almost as long as their bodies sometimes.

I held the net over my body, and I walked slowly over to the gate.

Just in time. My brother’s school bus dropped him off a bit of distance away and he grinned happily when he saw me standing there waiting for him. I always waited for him, but never with a net around my body. I guess, he liked the novelty of it.

“What game are you playing? I wanna play, too.”

“Alright, then get underneath here, and let’s see if we can get back in the house without getting stung or falling over.”

It was harder to do this with another person, but eventually, we got to the screen door and slammed it shut behind us without any problems.

I asked my brother if he got stung, but he proudly said no.

I gave him his afterschool treat and he sat on a little chair, eating his treat, merrily telling me about the day.

As I listened to his story about puppies and kittens, I saw that the angry wasp now had a friend with him. And then another. Until there were at least ten of them at the door.

There was no one coming home at least for another 4 hours.

But I guess I could use the net again to save them from being stung. Before that though, I would have to call my dad and instead of reporting how my little brother was home, I had to tell him how I was able to protect myself and my little brother from some angry wasps. I was sure he would want to hear this story.