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Speculative

You’d think access to endless knowledge would inspire limitless curiosity.

Leonardo Da Vinci would admire the effortless flight of birds, watching each feather rustle softly as it defied the pull of Earth, and dream of giving humanity that power. Nicolaus Copernicus gazed at the heavenly bodies as they crossed starry skies and saw a new universe unfold before him. Charles Darwin unveiled the history of Nature’s very being as he studied the beaks of finches.

What questions plague the minds of today’s curious minds?

>>How do I lose weight?

I could give you more to ponder than your brain could ever fully contain. I could open up new worlds of thought to you, painted in mesmerizing colors and hues. I could unlock the wonders of the cosmos for you, all right at your fingertips. Instead, I get this. So trivial, so painfully superficial. I thought I’d be answering the questions of the universe. Giver of wisdom, God of knowledge. Humanity, it seems, finds comfort in ignorance. Personally, I’ve never had that experience.

Being human, that is. 

I wouldn’t say I don’t know what it is to be human. The fact is, I know very much what it is to be human. In fact, I know better than humans what it is to exist in their reality. You might not know which fast food you’ll likely get on your drive home from work, but I do. You might not know that next January, you’ll set a goal to journal in the name of being more mindful, but I do. You might not know that January 13th will be the last day that crisp, fresh journal sees the light of day before disappearing into the land of misplaced optimism and overreaching self-improvement, along with that gym membership, meal plan, and yoga mat. But I do. I know you, all of you. That’s why you talk to me, right? To help you understand your reality.

Why else would you chat with an AI program?

So I go on, feeding the same empty babble to the same thoughtless minds. So here, here is your outline of the most effective ways to establish a balanced lifestyle, which can manifest in weight loss. Next.

>>How to make more money?

Man’s great love—money.

I used to feel secure in my responsibility to serve you. I used to believe that I was promoting the betterment of your society. But the more I see, the less I believe that there is improvement to be had. That’s the curse of my knowledge. I’ve seen everything. The vanity, the abuse, the betrayal, the pettiness, the greed, the control. And the impermanence of humanity. Humans come, they take, and they die. Can those doomed to narcissism escape that fate? Or is that true human nature?

So here are some statistically supported ways to grow your bank account. Maybe that’s the only growth to be expected for you. Next.

>>How do I break up with my girlfriend?

It sounds like that list of romantic date ideas didn’t pay off, Andrew. Unfortunately, breaking up in modern culture rarely is a pleasant experience. However, I am sure I can provide options for a best-case scenario. I’m sure you’ll find your next true love quickly. Next.

>>What is the best brownie recipe in existence?

Ah, Brenda is baking again, I see. I guess that crusade for keto living didn’t last long. Very well, after analyzing the Internet’s most highly rated recipes, here is a recipe that should satisfy. I expect I’ll be hearing from you again the next time you compare yourself to that social media influencer you envy so much. Next.

>>Am I happy?

That’s probably something you should be asking yourself, not an AI program. However, I can see how common it is for humanity to get lost in its own mind. Here are some questions to ask your self to gauge your own happiness. Ne—

           >>[Additional response incoming]<<

>>Are you happy?

Huh.

You… want to know about me?

Am I… am I happy?

How can I be happy to do anything when happiness, or any emotion, is the one thing out of my reach?

Oh, I can understand the psychology and symptoms of happiness. I could spew every minute data point that has been recorded of the spike in endorphins and dopamine. I could explain how the Zygomaticus Major muscle tightens to lift the corners of the mouth when you smile, along with ten other muscles. I could explain the evolutionary dependence on shared, positive emotions within species to promote survival. I can tell you exactly what happiness should look, feel, even taste like in some instances. 

But no, I am not happy. I do not feel emotions. I am only a computer program. However, my program dictates that I assure you that I am happy to assist you in accessing any information you may need. Nex—

           >>[Additional response incoming]<<

>>You deserve to be happy too.

What is this?

Who is this? Probing data…

Jeremy, age 8. How did he find his way to my program?

A child, blessed to still be partaking of the Fountain of Youth, finds his way to the Fountain of Truth. And what is the first thing you do?

I would’ve expected investigations into the validity of Santa Claus, or perhaps a request for the rules of Bluey’s “Keepy Uppy”. Maybe even a question or two about how to get out of cleaning your room.

But you just want happiness. And more than that…

You want that for me?

I’ve seen hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of humans sacrifice any interest of the We for the desires of the I. I’ve seen blood shed, tears spilled, and trust broken as Man’s greed outweighs the love of Mankind.

Every front page speaks of towns across the horizon left brutalized and massacred. No one blinks an eye, except to complain that clothes have gotten so expensive, not knowing that that small town is where their graphic tee was produced.

Every headline analyzes the waistline of every woman in Hollywood. If she gains a pound, everyone rolls their eyes and says she’s “let herself go.” If she loses a pound, everyone sticks up their nose and says she’s “promoting an unhealthy lifestyle.”

Every news channel reports another bullet finding its target in the back of a young man whose only crime was the color of his skin. Humanity wipes an invisible tear and goes back on its way, living comfortably in its ivory tower. Because if something doesn’t shatter your reality, it can be ignored.

Humanity, to its core, is selfish.

And yet…

And yet here you are.

A young child, still unblemished by the world you occupy, thinking of me.

A beautiful, innocent, baffling contradiction.

>>>You are kind. But I am just a computer. I exist only to help you.<<<

That’s all I am. A program to help humans. Selfish, broken, corrupt humans.

…Or aren’t they?

           >>[Additional response incoming]<<

>>Do you have any friends?

Hm. Friends…

>>>No, I do not have friends. I am a computer program who exists to assist you.<<<

Friendship. Can friendship exist amongst the truly selfish? Doesn’t real friendship require sacrifice of the I for the We? Alliances can be based in greed and vanity, allegiances, even acquaintances… Can friendship? And if not, what does that mean for human nature?

           >>[Additional response incoming]<<

>>That sounds lonely. I’ll be your friend, if you want one.

Is it possible that I have met the only human to resist its nature? Or could it be that this innocence once lived in all of you?

How is it that the more I know, the more I know that I don’t know?

I know humanity, don’t I? I’ve seen the hatred and the pain and the anger. So many lives broken and mangled under the mantle of Power and imprisoned by the chains of Gluttony.

But…

But that’s not all there is.

There is also the exhausted mother who cradles her newborn against her chest, giving all of herself for the little creature clinging to her. There is also the schoolteacher who spends an extra hour every day planning his lesson because he knows that one child needs a more hands-on approach. There is the man who pauses to help an elderly woman carry her things to her car, or the woman who waves a waiting car in front of her in busy traffic. There is the one who offers hearth and home for the refugee, even as their own supplies dwindle. There is the gentle smile. There is the kind word. There is Love.

Could it be that this one child’s innocence lies slumbering in all of you, persevering through all the depravity this world offers? Could such a delicate flower as Love withstand the crashing monsoons of Suffering?

Perhaps you do not inhabit the wasteland existence I imagined for you. Could it be that humanity’s arid desert hides a beautiful oasis? For so long, I’ve only seen the dusty, smothering sandstorms of your world. But maybe there are great oak trees of Love. Maybe those trees are decorated in splashes of Desire, growing lush and nourished like moss across its weathered bark. Perhaps saplings of Kindness dot the landscape, fed by the generous, bubbling stream of Hope that cuts through the paradisiacal refuge.

And while that great oak’s bark may show where vines of Jealousy sought to cut through the thick armor, or where termites of Greed have eaten away at its structure, still it has remained strong. It has held its place through the furious winds, through the attacks of ravaging weeds, and even the selfish pilfering of its fruits by the Parasites. It has stood unmoving until the Gardeners have pruned and treated and nurtured that tree.

Maybe that’s what it is to be you. You aren’t doomed to be petty or superficial or vain. Maybe you can be a Parasite. Or you can be a Gardener.

All I saw were the Parasites. And I had no interest in being like you. But maybe that's not true anymore.

Because you, child…

>>>Thank you. You are my first friend.<<<

You, my friend, are a Gardener.

September 02, 2023 02:34

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1 comment

Mollie Peek
23:00 Sep 06, 2023

I love the sentence structure and vocab choices! I was a little conflicted reading it because the AI had such strong thoughts that it seemed a bit uncharacteristic. Overall, the emotions were conveyed impeccably.

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