ABRACADABRA

Warning: Sexual References, Cussing, Swearing and Drug use and Mental Health referenced.

I have always steered clear of Romance writing. I mean, the mushy, sentimental kind that some writers – mostly myself - shy away from. However, this week's writer's prompt happened to be that theme - Romance! It seemed pretty straightforward - boy meets girl, they fall in love, have some tension and conflicts then ultimately tie the knot - right?

The recorded announcement at the train station stated, "The Brisbane City and Caboolture Train will arrive in approximately 2 minutes. Please wait behind the yellow safety line until the train arrives." I looked forward to boarding the train that morning, as I had for the last three mornings, and found that relief underneath a blowing air conditioning vent. We were in the midst of a heatwave in the middle of winter. Daytime temperatures were reaching 35-to-37 degrees Celsius causing jokes to circulate about why 'Christmas in July' was cancelled. 

I boarded the train and breathed cool happiness, there I spotted my favourite seat empty at the far end of the carriage. After placing my bag on my lap, I made my spot comfortable. I pulled out my phone and scrolled. Out of nowhere, two characters, Beth and Danny, popped into my head. Their appearances and names started to take shape in my mind. Excitedly, I opened my writer's app and began typing:

"Danny was surprised to find Beth rummaging in the fridge when he unlocked her front door, in the early hours of the morning. Caught, she pretended to stretch and yawn. In his hands, Danny carried a container of leftover Vegetable Korma. As he presented it to Beth, she clapped her hands with delight. By means of gratitude, or any excuse, she kissed Daniel with perhaps too much passion and clumsily forgot to enquire about his day or validate his fatigue levels, "Ooh thank you. Yummy a midnight snack for me.” 

Danny couldn't help but smile to himself as he noticed Beth was wearing makeup, had a slight hint of perfume, had adorned herself in a brand new, short, frilly, silk pajamas, and sported false eyelashes. Seeing the television switched on, it was clear to him that she had waited up for him. "I'm going to take a shower and freshen up," he informed her. Walking past her bedroom, he caught sight of her inviting bed and noticed the cat curled up at the end of her treasured small patterned floral print doona. He recognized the soft furnishing print, it was Amanda Piquet; his Ex, Anne, loved that brand."

***

That afternoon, homeward bound, I reread Beth and Daniels romance and hated it! Everything was wrong about it! Yuk, I had rushed them to the bedroom! The whole story was Kitsch! 

My ruminations were interrupted, "Next stop is Indooroopilly, Indooroopilly station. This train runs express from Indooroopilly-to-Darra." People boarded and the train horn sounded. Then a tall, spindly character jammed the closing doors with his elbow and leather man purse. In that split second it felt like he had surged or spilled into the carriage. Disheveled, he eyeballed the vacant seat beside me. I was hoping he would sit elsewhere. Alas, I was unlucky; he sat and made himself comfortable next to me. That action caused wafts of a faint yeasty, rotten dough odour to rise from his black and white checked pants and apron. Unaware, he pulled out his phone from his handbag and hunched over his screen.

Out of nowhere, my peace was again disrupted, when the young man drew in a huge, loud involuntary breath. It was as if he expected it. He strained to hold that inexhaustible inhale inside of himself and hurriedly tilted his pelvis to yank at a corner of his large handkerchief from his hip pocket. ARCHOO,! He caught his violent, wet sneeze. Instinctively, I turned away from him and pressed my check against the window.

He gurgled phlegm in the back of his throat, then swallowed it. Apologetically, he explained, "I'm sorry my allergies are playing up real bad." At a safe distance, I nodded sympathetically and affirmed, "This strange weather's doing that to a lot of people. I mean, like, it's causing people's hay fever. There’s heaps of mould, mildew and pollen floating around in the air and in air conditioners."

***

Two days passed after I reluctantly deleted the Danny and Beth love story. I justified myself, "After all, I mostly write paranormal and mystery stories, not fairy-tale romances!" That said, I set about doing errands. I was amongst the grocery store shelves when a fresh idea sprung in my imagination. I began to see the romance prompt with new eyes. I supposed, “I could write a contemporary story and introduce a female character named Skye as Beth's new love interest”

I could hardly wait. I hastily filled my trolley with groceries and rushed to the counter and completed my purchase. I was once again in the creator goddess zone! Near the chemist, I spied a recycled hard-plastic, complimentary shopping centre bench. I rested on the seat and spoke to the phone on the writer's app:

"This year, Skye decided to holiday in Queensland. Her model-like body, at least eight heads high, stood tall. Her self-confidence shone on the deck of ‘The River's Node Bar and Restaurant' which overlooked the Brisbane River. Her fashion statement - large round 70’s-style sunglasses and a floppy white brimmed hat, under which her luscious ringlets of brunette hair peeked out – show her mystique and in Beth's opinion, "Sexy."

Beth sensed an instant connection with Skye, she thought this stranger was beautiful. Beth made her way through the crowd to stand close to the railing and more truthfully to pick up Skye. She shouted over the music, "You're not from around here, are you?" Skye fluttered her eyelashes and nonchalantly adjusted her drinking straw and teased the cream in 'White Russian. Like a butterfly, she floated near Beth's ear and sweetly replied, "No, lovely, I'm from the Blue Mountains, Katoomba actually."

***

My discourse abruptly stopped. I was jolted by the weight of a woman who plonked herself onto my seat. She dumped her shopping bags down on the ground and bent her leg to her chest and dragged her high heel off. She reacted from the sudden pain, “Ouch,” Turning, she realised her imposition and softly touched my shoulder, "Oh, excuse me honey, did you mind that I sat here?" I shrugged my shoulders, “Its ok.” She winced as she lifted her foot and rested it at right angles on her knee. She also, in a ladylike way, flipped her velvet skirt back down from her exposed thigh to her calves. 

She touched her raw ankle, exclaiming "Ooh, ouch," again. I foraged in my bag and found some old, battered band aids exclaiming as I held them out, “Please take one,” I leaned forward to look at the blistered ankle, “Nasty. Don’t bust it or it will get infected!” The woman plastered her wound. She informed me, "I’ve been at the beauty clinic, darling," Once her fingers were freed from the dressing, she showed off and wiggled her freshly painted false nails, “Twinkle, twinkle little spa, facials, girl's stuff, there you are."

***

It was Thursday and I still felt edgy. The Saturday deadline loomed, Beth and Skye was - well - too clichéd. I needed a break from the computer screen. I hoisted my heavy jacket over my shoulders and spun my striped scarf around my neck. I grabbed the car keys and a parcel next to them.

I noticed the recreational park’s trial was very busy. I meandered along the tree-lined footpath in a dream-like state. The wind whipped up and forced synapsed leaves to let go: they twirled and fell on me like confetti. The town clock bell paid tribute to the scene when it chimed ten times. 

The trance collapsed when I heard something humming behind me and guessed it might be a scooter. I got out of its way, as a mischievous child zoomed past me down the hill. A Collie stopped sniffing the freshly cut grass and barked at him. Its older and more engaging female owner waved a cheerful, "Good morning." I couldn't help but remark, "It's refreshing to feel winter once more, isn't it?" Before she could respond, the inquisitive canine tugged her in another direction. I reflected, if Beth was mature-age, that woman would be her mirror image. I brainstormed, “What if I made Daniel and Beth an older couple? Hmm, that might have potential?” I talked into my trusty phone app as it transcribed my words:

"Hmm, let’s see, Danny, or perhaps Daniel, to be more formal. After the death of his beloved wife, Betty, Daniel left the shores of Tasmania and relocated to Queensland. He noq lived n his beloved daughter's granny flat. The whole ordeal had left him lost, lonely and sometimes depressed. He chose to connect with others and joined a few senior social groups, as well as, kept healthy by frequenting the local park with his faithful and aging canine companion, Cassie.

Today was different, Daniel truly had skip in his step. He mused to himself, “This old man's still got it!” He recalled the first time he laid eyes on Beth. Oh boy, was he interested. He casually enquired at the seniors' bowling club about her. He discovered Beth had a passion for art and more importantly, had an art entry in the upcoming Ipswich Art Festival. 

Last week, he bought her first prize winning landscape painting and over coffee he obtained her phone number. He halted. What would the kids think? What would people say, his wife was not even cold in her grave?"

***

Rejuvenated, I leaned against my car, waiting as an older couple to pass, before I opened my door. They hesitated, surprised I pleasantly smiled at them, as they whispered and went in the opposite direction. Getting in my car, I knew there would be long queue at the Post office but the parcel, a birthday present, needed to be sent. The line-up would be laborious and during the wait I could scratch the Skye, Beth and Daniel's stories.

My turn to be served never came quick enough. I desperately needed to use the Ladies, so I paid the postage and scurried along a pokey hallway to the female toilets. The isolated area spooked me. I was relieved when I saw a woman bending towards the bathroom mirror and fixing her lipstick. I entered the solitary cubicle and squashed, reshaped and balanced my handbag on the toilet roll holder. As mulled over stuff, my writer's block frustration overwhelmed me. I stamped my feet in a tiny tantrum. I no longer wanted to enter this week’s Romance prompt. I spoke to my phone's speaker which partially protruded from my handbag, "Google, open my writer’s app":

"ABRCADABRA!

It was Halloween. Beth dressed in her fantasy maid's costume, threw her head back and downed a few Valium tablets with a Tequila. She was sick of this futile life. Her fishnet stockings outlined her curved thighs and fleshy legs, making her look irresistible. She hollered, "Demetri, we’ll be late for the party - are you ready, love?"  

Meanwhile, Demetri straightened his brown, hairy-eared hat. He admired his trim athletic shaped body which was accentuated from his hugging men's long black, ballet leotards. His feet felt comfy in Beth’s fluffy slippers. All that gave him the appearance of a dingo.

ABRACADABRA !"

***

BANG, BANG!" I looked toward the noise and stopped venting. Someone then rattled the cubicle door. An aggressive female voice yelled, "You've been in there for over fifteen minutes! What are you doing? I got a kid out here doing the Rain Dance? That means she's nearly peeing herself. For God’s sake, GET OUT of there!"

I hurriedly dressed and flushed the toilet. I sheepishly appeared and muttered, "Sorry." The woman in a long silk dressing gown scowled at me. Her hands sat on her hips. I noted her left hand clutched a feather duster. I scanned the room, I couldn't see that strange woman's child anywhere. She scoffed, "There is no kid lady," She turned and bellowed, "Get over here Skye – Demetri – Danny or whatever name SHE chose for you this time!"

I was dumbfounded, that woman had said my romance character names? I squinted my eyes, surprised she looked like the character Beth. And Skye, who I had seen earlier fixing her lipstick had lost her hair and now wore, my recent Demetri narrative of that dingo cap etc. I panicked, my eyes jumped to see Skye's brown wig curls knotted and carelessly hanging out of her shoulder bag.

Beth said, as she reproachfully jabbed me with her duster. "Adjusted yet?" I rubbed my eyes and my ears as I did not believe either of my perceptics. Confused and dazed, I gasped, "No!" I reached for my phone. Beth swept behind me, stuck her duster in my back and commanded, "Stick ‘em up! You’re not going to delete us again!" Danny trembled then squealed and ran towards me with a spray bottle, squirting water in my face while Beth apprehended my phone and hissed, "Confiscated!"

The two shuffled me down the hallway, through the emergency door and out into the carpark. Pareidolia perplexed me. My disorganised mind blurted out, "If this hallucination is based on the romances then where did you get that spray bottle Danny?" That triggered both Beth and Danny to bicker, "I lost Danny over a cat YOU made me have!" Danny pointed at me, "I was OK with the cat until I got hay fever because SHE wrote it to sleep on your bed!"

The argument stopped when the lock on my car door clicked. Beth swayed a little and slopped into the passenger seat. I felt sorry I had written up a mix of tablets and alcohol for her - or more realistically – feed the delusion the mixture.

Danny perched in the back seat and then tapped me on the shoulder. Disbelieving that I felt his touch, I watched his reflection speak in the rear view mirror, “Man, you made it hard for us to remain a couple,” I readied myself. Danny continued, "Do you remember when you changed my name to Skye? To play that part professionally, I lost my beard and had a facial wax. Beth slurred, "My baby face looked so beautiful walking in them high heels. Danny , I want your girl's wardrobe.

My two passengers after seeing my saucer eyes, glared at each other and agreed I must be a little crazy. Danny broke the silence, "Do you believe in love?" I moaned, "I believe in love but not in romance." Danny laughed loudly at my irrationality, "Ah ha," and then quizzed me, "Well, MS, how do you get the tangle," He hooted, "Without the vibe?" 

I was glad the traffic lights were red. I was able to look both of those people straight in the eyes. I was able to be defensive with both of my hallucinations, "Daniel and Skye lived interstate which was too repetitive." Beth snorted a laugh, "Repetitive? You made our bodies wrinkly and old. You triggered Danny's generation trauma." Danny nodded as Beth blew, "Did you know Dan’s ancestor served his sentence as a convict in Tasmania? Why? All because he stole one slice of bread from Her Majesty! And you in all your granduer made him stay in Hobart married to Betty for most of his life!" My muscles tensed, I retorted, "Hey, cut the guilt trip. How could I know that?" I hoped soon this nightmare would end. I theorised, on the journey to my home, I should not give my energy or attention to the illusions and perhaps they might disappear. 

They were still there I pulled into the driveway of my own house. Bump! I heard the phone drop. Beth was dead to the world. Her hand must have relaxed its grasp and I think by the sound, my phone probably toppled between the passenger seat and door. Danny's gaze stayed fixed on me, "You're not having it." Sensing something Beth’s body hotwired and she jumped out of her skin. She slurred and muttered something discord, "Yer, what was it like growing up in the eighties with a Neptune and south node in Scorpio?" Huh? No one had ever asked me that question and I needed to control myself and not answer. Danny realising Beth was onto something pushed the issue, "Yes. What was it like?" I sighed, "The gavel slammed easily as State and religion controlled sexual choice!"

I collapsed on the steering wheel and banged my head over and over again, "Please go away!"

Beth yelled, "Not until you marry us!"

***

Dear Beth and Danny,

I am the Executive Creator. I apologise for the rudeness, self indulgence, and newfangled mess our exhausted Draft Writer caused in both your lives. The Draft writer did not understand you both personally experienced every scenario deeply that she wrote.

I am glad you both avoided the superficial, survived and also grew together in all those rigorously hard times, regardless of each other's age, class, body type, drug dependency and gender stereotypes. You are indeed soulmates.

I will finish you story and marry you:

As Danny stood at the altar, waiting eagerly for Beth to make her entrance on the chapel floor. The congregation stood for the bride. Danny couldn't help but feel an overwhelming sense of pride as he watched Beth walk down the aisle towards him. It was a truly beautiful sight, and Danny couldn't contain his emotions as he prepared to declare his love and commitment to the woman of his dreams.

Best Wishes and Blessings in your marriage,

Rose Lind.