A Workers manifesto

Todays the day I change, I have been in a dark for sometime now, constantly be-raiding my self on what haven’t been accomplished. All of the failed projects all of the dreams I let drift into an abyss never to be seen again…no more, no more feeling less than no more putting myself down god gave us the capabilities to accomplish ever goal we can envision so what’s stopping me? Somewhere in my journey I became so insecure about the abilities god gave me I started to believe I had none, todays the day I change. Maybe if I say that enough I will start to believe it.

todays the day I change. 

Awoke this morning late as usual dragged myself out of bed and went to work didn’t brush my teeth because… why does it matter I did not want to talk to anyone anyways. 

Arrived to work and anticipate the same small talk I do every morning with the same people everyday. It usual goes something like this 

(bob) “morning” 

(me) “Morning, you see the game last night?” 

(Bob) I ”I did crazy right” 

(me) “yes” 

then we carry on with are day. Most times I didn’t watch the game just checked the score and watched a few highlights just to be able to have something to talk about, you see starting a job straight after graduating high school most of my coworkers are two if not three times my elders with kids my age so we do not have very much to talk about in fact most see me as a kid it so they did not expect me to know much ( they are mostly right) I usually meander through my days at work doing just enough to not get fired, In fact joking with my friends about how crazy they were for not letting me go yet had became one of my favorite past-times, constant mistakes, customers calling and complaining about my work all the time showing up late (they must be short on help ) or maybe they like me hell who knows.

 After work racing home just to sit on the couch trying to forget my day by thinking about all the amazing things I could have done instead of being at work became my escape. thoughts like flying to great Britain to meet the queen leading an expedition through the amazon climbing mount Kilimanjaro would almost bring me to “braingasm” but I would always be brought back to reality with the beep of the microwave telling me my dinner is ready (last night left overs,Yay!) And as I sit there eating what used to be a delicious meal aimlessly searching for something interesting to watch thinking “Todays the day I change”. 

“Todays the day I change” have became almost like a mantra in my life it almost haunts me. This world wasn’t meant for someone like me I’m the “little guy” I do what’s told to me. 

 Im ready to break free

never going to college always meant being something like lawyer or doctor was out the question for me, never really had interest in those fields anyways. Honestly never really had interest working any job, I wanted to travel the world meet new people go on exciting adventures farfetched for someone like me someone who did not excel in school or sports so I did what was many do and got a job . Not working for desire but the fear of being labeled a “bum” or disappoint anyone close to me so going the safe route at that point was the only apparent option. A decision that haunted me for years, not one day nor night went by were I dreamed about what could have been if only my beliefs in myself was stronger. 

Stuck in a vicious cycle, Cracking under the pressure I felt the floor give… falling into a deep depression No longer able to recognize myself avoiding mirrors missing calls from love ones just checking in, I was spiraling. Days became darker happiness seemed more like a myth, every mistake ever made spun around my head like a carousel… I can hear the music now.

living… not being under control of the higher ups not worrying about what others had to say the thought of freedom seemed almost worth dying for and some nights that seemed like the only way.

Working a 9 to 5 was not the problem, being restricted was. Living under public perception and social norms, afraid to be who I am truly was killing me. Waking every morning to a place I abhor just because that’s what you’re supposed to do no longer sits right with me, today the day that change. 

(Narrator)

Ricky closed his journal turned off his lights and went to bed. 

He did not get much sleep this night, tossing and turning thinking of ways to “break out” 

Morning finally came 

Tired but excited Ricky knew what he had to do. He put on his uniform brushed his teeth and went to work. The drive to work was different this morning, usually playing music or one of his favorite podcast this car ride was quiet. Focusing on what he was going to do when he arrived at work nothing could distract him. 

His energy was dark. 

Ready to do what he planned in his head practicing line for line what he was going to say Ricky was ready. Bursting through his office doors with the confidence of someone who had just won a million bucks ready to tell every person there how he felt, But to his surprise he could not when he took a good look around the grey office and his co workers walking almost zombie like he realized something… they were all trapped. 

Embarrassed, Ricky returned to his usual position at his desk a little defeated he decided to ask his closes co worker a question. 

“What’s do you want to do with your life?” He asked 

“What do you mean” replied the co worker 

Like with your life if you could leave this place right now what would you do? 

(Narrator)

The co worker a middle age white man sat back and thought for awhile I don’t know he replied… I used to dream of owning a bakery with my wife. 

(Ricky) So why don’t you? 

(Co worker) Why would I got benefits a good retirement I have nothing to worry about!

(Ricky) but what about your dreams?

(Co worker) dreams are for children we live in the real world. 

Ricky, horrified with the answer given realized he was staring at his future, if he continued on the same path he too would lose his dreams… this was the last straw. Ricky finished his shift, left a note on his bosses desk and walked out his office doors knowing they would never see him again. 

Todays the day he changed.