Well...That Just Happened

Joan was talking with her brother Will. They were at a park, hanging out while social distancing. They were having a pretty normal conversation. Some topics that they covered were the coronavirus, politics, the park's greenery, how people aren't exactly social distancing so that makes them superior, cats, their paranoid mom, vaccines, bands, shower thoughts, things that happened in the past when you could be free to hang out with family and friends, and not now, when people give you the stink eye for getting even 1 inch close to them, the new movies that are coming out on Disney Plus and Netflix, how someone forgot to change the toilet paper roll (Joan insists that it was Will), the amount of hand sanitizer their mom is using is insane and surely her hands will break out, vegetables from cans that taste disgusting and wonder why their mom doesn't buy anything else, who's going to get the TV remote when they get home from the park to put on their show, you know. Typical stuff to talk about when you're teenagers during the pandemic. Their mom that morning decided to brave the dangers of the virus by letting her kids get some fresh air. Like to get rid of her crazy kids by taking their pent up energy about school, homework, sports, games, family, friends, social media, the Internet, almost trivial sibling rivalries, outside of her house and into the park. While social distancing and not being a nuisance to other people. So here they were, standing on a pathway in the park, moving out of people's way as to avoid coming in as close as 6 feet. Their mom has gone back to their car to grab some masks and hand sanitizer, because she's pretty forgetful and paranoid. While, she was gone, Joan and Will notice a couple in their 30s trying to talk to this other couple in their 20s, standing 6 feet apart from them. The 30s couple are trying to get closer because they can't hear the 20s couple over the noise everyone else in the park is making. The 20s couple are trying to move away, speaking loudly as best as they can. Joan, who has been entertained by the 2 couples' conversation, said, "Haha, this is fun. I can't believe we've been shut inside for awhile now. I think those 2 couples might agree." Will retorts, "Yeah, the younger couple might wish they'd have stayed home if they realize they're backing into that koi fish pond over there." "Wha-", Joan looks up, "oh my gosh, you're right! Should we tell them?" Will mutters, "Eh, how about not. I want to see what happens." The 2 couples are still arguing, something about social distancing and what not. Joan, looking at her phone, complains, "How long is Mom going to get back?" Will says, "I don't know, the car is kinda far away from here." Joan asks, "So it might take awhile for Mom to come back with the stuff?" "Yep," Will sighs, "I'm bored." Joan asks, "Then you want to hear some more shower thoughts?" Will looks away. Joan says, "Did you know...that sand is between sea and land, because it's a mixture of those 2 words?" Will says, "That's so stupid." Joan says, "No, it's not. It's pretty logical." Will asks, "What, did you get that from those YouTube videos you watch?" Joan looks at her phone, sees a text she just received from their mom and says, "Yeah. Of course." Will asks, "So, what did Mom text?" Joan says, "She's trying to keep exactly 6 feet away from other people, but the park's so crowded, it's really hard to do that." Will asks, "How long will she be?" Joan says, "Knowing her, a good long 20 minutes. Or a half hour, depending on today." They both groan. Will, watching the 2 couples fight on about not being able to hear each other, social distancing, and the fact that the man of the 20s couple has a bee on it, starts to chuckle. He says, "Joan, look. That younger couple is dangerously close to falling in that pond." Joan looks up from her phone. She gasps, "Oh crap, you're right. We should tell them." She starts to walk toward them, but Will pulls her back. He says, "Joan, what happened to social distancing?" Joan says, "But-" Will says, "Keep 6 feet away from each other. Plus, I still want to see what happens." Joan says, "Okay..." The 20s couple are still yelling at the 30s couple, calling them paranoid boomers and millennial freaks, when they fall in the pond. The 30s couple, running away, either to call help or to leave them there, yells, "You just had a bee on your leg! We didn't do anything, we swear!" The 20s couple jumps out of the koi fish pond, and chases the couple, screeching about them being wet and muddy and that they weren't practicing social distancing, and that they are going to murder them if it's the last thing they do. They leave the area where Joan and Will are standing, and for a good solid 10 minutes, Joan and Will are still waiting for their mom to come back, while all the people at the park are going bananas, because of 2 screaming couples, with one tracking water and mud, how they're violating the 6 feet rule because one is chasing the other, and how that those with kids are berating them for cursing naughty words that their kids shouldn't hear, how elderly couples who are trying their gosh darn best to avoid people and social distance are sighing "Kids these days..." and praying to God that they not get the coronavirus because of these ruffians absolutely failing at social distancing and causing a racket, and how everyone else is just annoyed at them, muttering that they're the reason every other country in the world hates the United States of America. Joan and Will, still standing on the pathway, look at each other, unsure of what just happened, stunned that the coronavirus pandemic is doing all of these crazy, probably inhumane things that they guess these people wouldn't actually do if there weren't these events happening right now. Joan asks, "So... you know how pony and bologna rhyme?"