Author Note

May Contain brief mentions of domestic abuse and mental health.

October 10, 2022

Hey mom,

Guess what, the bakery is doing well these days. It was a bit of a struggle for Lana and I to get a handle on things here while you're gone. We never realized how much you were back boning this place. We could never get the recipes just right the way you made it, yet the customers still seem to like them.

Also, remember Uncle Benny? You know the homeless guy you’d always save a lunch box for after every shift. Well stopped by today after not seeing him for half a month. Today he walked in with two little boys, and it turns out he has nephews. It was quite surprising but also reliving to see that he was well. We were worried something happened to him when he hadn't shown up for a couple of days.

It also turns out that he's living well with his sister in law's family. Did you know they had lost contact when his wife passed, but I bet you did. It's just nice seeing him again, now all clean shaven and not in worn patchy clothes that look like they could fall apart with a slight breeze. Actually he looks a lot younger now, maybe I should ask him about his skin routine.

Anyways he’d stopped by to deliver a present for you, it was a box wrapped in beautiful wrapping paper decorated with chrysanthemums, your favorite flower. And also to get a box or two of donuts for the boys, he let them choose which flavors they wanted. That turned out to be a big mistake, practically hearing them list the whole menu. It was funny watching him reign them in.

Before leaving their two boxes of dozens he told me to make sure you get your present. He wanted it to be his little thank you for everything you've done for him. For the kindness you showed when he felt he didn't need it. He’d been so bitter to the world before, blaming it for his wife's death that became the catalyst downfall to where he was.

It was you who stretched out your hand to him giving him that push he needed to start again; to stop blaming his wife's death and himself for his life and to do something about it.

He wants you to know that he's truly grateful for everything you've done for him. Also for helping him get in contact with his former sister in law. Now he has a well paying job and a family who loves and supports him. These days he’s so busy with work and his two nephews he hadn't been able to properly say thank you to you before. But he’d like to now, hoping you’ll enjoy the gift he’d brought for you.

Don't worry mom I'll keep this box safe until you come home to open it. Nobody other than uncle Benny will know what is inside. This is his gratitude to you

and nobody else.

October 19, 2022

Hey, mom,

Guess what, I was at the store today shopping for ingredients to make your super special chili. Lana, dad and I thought it would be a good idea to add it to the menu as a Wednesday special. Although we’re kind of stumped, no matter how we make it, it just doesn't taste the same. Tell me mom, what was the recipe?

Also while I was shopping in the beans section, you wouldn't believe who I ran into. It was my old biology teacher Miss Kassey. We were both picking up ingredients to make the same thing. She'd stopped to talk to me, asking how you were. Honestly, I didn't know how to answer. Nevertheless she was patient, telling me to leave a message to you to stop by so she could let you in on her secret chili recipe.

Her smile was so much brighter now than the one she had during classes back at the high school. Did you know? Whenever students at the time would leave the classroom. Her face would look all sunken in and tired like an old broken down wind up toy. That needed tuning, but you knew didn't you?

Remember when I suddenly came home asking you to pack extra cupcakes in my bag for lunch? Well, it wasn't for friends but just for her. Seeing her face light up seeing it placed on the desk when everyone else left was just fulfilling. Never knowing how much that meant to her or her situation at the time.

She'd asked that I tell you thank you for her, saying that if it wasn't for you she wouldn't have escaped from her abusers. Free from having to wear long clothing even in the scorching unbearable summers; all in the sake of hiding her bruises and scars. Having been so broken and ashamed of herself for being that way for so long.

Having contemplated that she was the real problem and not the other way around. It made her feel like she deserved what was happening to her. But just from that simple act of kindness and finding out about the cupcakes.

Having broken down In Front of you, but you listened to all her grievances and her thoughts. Listening to the broken, discarded worth mess that she was. You helped her find lawyers, helping her with new living arrangements to keep her safe. Even continuing to pack extra cupcakes just for her.

She says without you, her dark place would have remained dark for eternity. Having thoughts that she was nothing to the world, not even a speck. However, those cupcakes were her driving force to continue on.

Now understanding that when you wanted to talk to her about her grades; it was a session for her to be able to talk things out. Also times when everyone was out the house you'd invite her in making it her safe space to vent and get away. All that helped her to gain her confidence,.. herself back, couldn't find any other way to thank you. No wonder those days there was a pot full of delicious chili waiting on the stove. So it was Miss Kassey’s recipe. That explains why it tasted different on other days when you made it.

By the way did you know, she set up a foundation center for those that suffer through domestic violence. Men and women alike, she'd done it in your name. When you come back, wanna stop by one day and check it out? Miss Kassey says she can't wait to see you there.

November 1, 2022

Hey mom,

Guess what, it has gotten colder lately, the leaves are almost at their end of falling. It looks so beautiful out. Can't wait for you to see them, Dad, Lana and I thought it was a good idea for us to go on a walk together. Feeling we haven't been spending enough time to appreciate each other and the little things lately. We all started kicking around and playing in the leaves, we were even talking about funny stories from our childhood, everymomery holding you in them. It makes us miss you everyday, when are you coming home?

Remember Grandma Rachel that lived a little across from us? Well we saw her grandson Benjamin, the little boy shy, meek, glasses wearing boy Lana and I used to play with. He looks so different now, no longer wearing those thick rimmed glasses, having changed them out for a more thin sleek design. He’s more lean with a bit of a build to him and he was a lot more cheerful and open. Also he has a wife and four rambunctious kids now. When he approached us we almost didn't recognize him. But he recognized us.

Who would have thought the guy who would duck behind a tree and avoid eye contact with anyone of the opposite sex is now married. Remembering when we first met him he was shaking like a leaf. How times have changed? Turns out he’s back from the other prefecture due to a promising job opportunity.

Did you know? He went to that prefecture to attend college on a full scholarship. In middle school straight through high school he had a hard time at school due to most of the teachers. They would often belittle him and say he’s never going to amount to anything because he would never understand. Always calling him lazy and a bad student. I often wanted to fight against the teacher for him but he didn't want me to get demerits on his behalf. Once they falsely accused him of being a drug user, having a police officer come into class and rummage through his things. The embarrassed look he had that day, they didn't even bother to apologize to him. The nerve.

They were all wrong for this as he’s been nothing but a good student. Always turning in his homework, never back talking or misbehaving and always punctual. The only thing was that he had a hard time focusing and grasping certain concepts and his grades would fluctuate but that's just about it. He told us the day of that incident made him feel like he wanted to give up on schooling and for a better future. Feeling like they were right and he wouldn't amount to anything. Having tried to do some homework that day and maybe some studying, but nothing wasn't making sense to him. Having thrown the books and papers off his dining room table that day.

That was when you walked in on your usual visit that Thursday. Seeing the books and papers all scattered on the ground and him building model planes and architectural structures with toothpicks for his craft project. You’d walk over to him taking up a worksheet from off the ground to see that his math and physics as well as a few other subjects to see he got most of the equations correct, just the formulas were a little off. It's like something clicked to you that day. Having sat down and talked to him, you found out the problem. Although you came to check on Miss Rachel that day, you know he needed the help just as much. No wonder everyday after you came home from his house you’d be teaching yourself our school’s curriculum and those study sessions you’d have Lana and I over at his grandmother’s place.

He thanks you for having been patient with him when everyone seemed to have given up on him. Had you not seen him and decided to push him to achieve his goals he wouldn't be working at one of the Best IT companies on the whole continent. Having become a high ranking manager and leading two big projects on machines for hospitals to help out with researchs for those with ADHD like him.

He also had to thank you for showing him that there can be a tenderness to women that he shouldn't be afraid of, otherwise he wouldn't have met his wife today. Having never had the best experience with women before living with his grandmother. Also glad to hear how you reamed those teachers a new one bringing them to the school board. No wonder some even we were having trouble with didn't Lana and I anymore either. He even offered to help with any technical issues or if we ever need a firewall installed on the bakery website or anything else to just give him a call.

December 7, 2022

Hey mom,

Guess what, it's the holiday season and the bakery has been very busy with custom orders coming. Dad, Lana and I are not sure if we'll be able to fill them all, much less have time to buy presents this year. But don't worry though we have a bit of help. There's something Lana and I have been meaning to tell you. Actually we’re both engaged to two wonderful and caring guys.

Did you know? Dad cried a little when he saw the rings on our fingers. Though he already knew since they asked for his blessings beforehand. His usual Dad rarely cries, always holding this tough guy persona. But all know he's a big softy on the inside.

He must be sad realizing that his little girls are not so little anymore. Did you also know? We have a surprise for you as well. We're coming to see you, bringing along your favorite flowers as well chrysanthemums. We were able to peel away from the bakery a little bit. But what am I saying, we are already here as we speak. We wish we could see your face, we are also here with our finances, they said they wanted to ask for your blessing as well since they didn't get the chance to before.

So mom, do they fit the bill? We didn't know much else we could do to thank you nor did we have time to plan the perfect gift for you. However, we plan on leaving a space for you at our weddings and are thinking of opening up a Helpers fund foundation in your name. Thinking that the best present we can give is to continue to show the love and generosity you have shared over the years to others. We're thinking of calling it Marissa’s bright delights.

We know it sounds like a bakery name but it's rather a fitting legacy don't you say. Not just a thanks as a mother, wife or baker but as Marissa the woman that brought light and kindness to everyone around her and continually leaving a great impact on others and their lives.

Thank you for Everything

From:

Lana, Dad, Clarissa, Uncle Benny, Miss Kassey, Benjamin and everyone else.

Goodbye Mom Rest Well