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Write a story with the aim of making your reader laugh.

Posted in Short Story on Apr 18, 2025

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✍️ 137 stories

Hopping Mad

Submitted to Contest #299

(some mild swearing and sexual references) It was her fault. Don’t get me wrong – I did the deed, but after you hear my story, I hope you’ll agree with me that she had it coming to her.We had history. I thought it was mutual love – the proof being that in the colony, we were the mates with the most kits: 478 and counting. At least, we were counting.Barbara was always up for it, and I should have known something would happen. I mean, even though I’m a healthy, hot-blooded buck, I can only manage so much rumpy-pumpy. And apparently, it wasn’t ...

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The Clever Unkindness of Ravens

Submitted to Contest #299

The Clever Unkindness of Ravens OOooh, ooh. Here comes another one. Steady, aim, fire! YES! The unsuspecting target looked up. Hahahaha. Caw, caw. The poor man wiped plumb spatter from his brow. “Damn birds,” he muttered. Another, another! The branch shook as the big raven jumped up and down. He cocked his head and turned a beady black eye on the next target. No way she could've seen it coming. Splat. Screech! “You fucking bird!” The woman yelled. His colors gleamed like an oil slick in the sun. Peering through the burgundy plum tree leaves...

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Oedipus Complex

Submitted to Contest #299

Sigmund was starting to stir from his long slumber. He moaned and rolled over, still groggy. Slowly, little slits in his eyes opened. At a glance, he didn’t recognize his surroundings, so he shook his head, begging the fog of sleep to dissipate.“Hmmm. Where am I?” he said aloud. His voice seemed to reverberate in the large room, sounding louder than he meant to speak and almost otherworldly.Better keep quiet in case whoever brought me here isn’t friendly, he thought.He stretched and sat up to get a better look, rubbing the remnants of sleep ...

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My Cheeseburger bit me

Submitted to Contest #299

Len grabbed a burger at the drive thru. He always bought one burger to eat at home with the meal and a second burger to get him through the car ride back. He was in his mid 30’s and he always assumed that doing things like this would come back to bite him in the ass, but ultimately it turned out it bit him on the lip.Len reached into the fast-food bag. He took out a small single patty burger, folded back the paper, and attempted to sink his teeth into it. He missed. He bit into burgers a million times, he didn’t need to see it to eat it. Of ...

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Monster Contest

Submitted to Contest #299

In a dingy basement with cracked concrete walls, a CRT television sputters to life from atop a white plastic table. A large brown beetle, which had been hiding under a corner of the TV, skitters off to find a new shadow away from the light and hum of this new disturbance. The screen produces a hazy image that loops through the top back to the bottom, repeating a tumbling splay of colors like a clumsy waterfall. Eventually the picture settles.The first channel shows a sporting match, a gridiron contest, but with rusty earth replacing the trad...

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Green Juice and Egos: A Farmer’s Market Fable

Submitted to Contest #299

Green Juice and Egos: A Farmer’s Market Fable(Because sometimes the biggest drama isn’t on reality TV—it’s in front of a juice booth.)One of my more unforgettable experiences at the farmer’s market happened on a sunny afternoon that started off just like any other. I was manning a booth, selling healthy snacks and drinks to the wellness-obsessed weekend warriors—samples of flaxseed crackers, bottles of cold-pressed juices, and the star of our show—the green drink with a cult following and a reputation.It was thick, slightly menacing in color...

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Scrabbled Eggs

Submitted to Contest #299

I grew up in a small southwestern Ohio town where my dad owned a gas station. The cool thing about having a dad who owned a gas station was that back at the house, he never made us clean our bathrooms either. While never having to clean our bathrooms was a nice perk, there were downsides. Drying off our hands was an impossibility since the industrial paper towel dispenser was always empty. More flies and gnats buzzed around than at a Fourth of July town picnic. And we were constantly exposed to walls covered with some rather inappropriate se...

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What is Real?

Submitted to Contest #299

Rorg. He is a troll. He appears to be friendly as he offers me hand. I take it hesitantly, but soon give in. His handshake is firm and crushing. He laughs, a sound that is deep and coarse. “Are you fellow traveler human?” His features come to life under the firelight.I avert my gaze to the sky and reply. “I am.”Rorg laughs again, holding his leather armored stomach. “Are you good to my kind, or are you bad one?”Wow. This troll talks like a typical troll.I feel my throat tighten in his presence. I shouldn’t fear him, he seems genuine. I rise ...

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Not Creative Writing

Submitted to Contest #299

At a long conference table, a coterie of young adults sat, open laptops and pads of paper strewn in front of them. A flyer taped to the open door of the room came loose, fluttering to the floor and cutting through the silence. The last person to speak had fallen silent minutes ago, and the one to their right tapped a few times on the touchpad of his laptop, and cleared his throat. “Um, hello everyone. I’m Kil Potrie, he/him, first year, and um, and my story is uh, about like a uh, detective with a katana who is like, chasing? Or actually no,...

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Bucket List

Submitted to Contest #299

CW: Mature themes“I haven’t, but it’s on my bucket list.”- “Wot’s a bucket list?”“You ogres have no culture at all, do you?”- “You wot? We gots a lots of culture.”“Like what?”- “Like da Log Drum Festival.”“What’s that?”- “You don’t know wot a log drum is?”“Of course, I know what a log drum is. A hollow log you beat with a stick.”- “Right. Dat.”“The festival, what is it?”- “Oh. We builds a bonfire, beat on da log drums, dance around, and den go kill somefing to frow in the fire for eats.”“One festival hardly makes a culture.”- “Dere’s also da...

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The dog that knew too much

Submitted to Contest #299

want to tell you about a very smart dog called Tucker. Tucker couldn’t tell you why he was smarter than other dogs for two reasons. One, he was a dog, and they couldn’t talk. And two, he didn’t know.He just came into the world, with five other siblings, knowing stuff. He didn’t act like the other puppies; he didn’t get excited and bark at the postman whenever he came by. “That isn’t an axe murderer coming to kill them,” he had tried to explain to his littermates, “just a dude dropping off parcels.”But that didn’t work because then he had to ...

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The Hero of Metroville

Submitted to Contest #299

It’s a beautiful day in picturesque Metroville! The birds are singing, the people are smiling, and the sky is as clear and blue as the water! But, unbeknownst to the fair citizens of this wonderful town, a sinister plot is unfolding right under their nose. In an abandoned warehouse at the heart of Metroville, we find masked marauders carrying out the sinister whims of their villainous master, the evil Dr. N. Farious! What wicked schemes have these crooked crooks been employed to perpetuate this time!? A large machine is being assembled, shap...

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Dinner for Deux

Submitted to Contest #299

Dinner for DeuxBy James Ott“I’ll be gone for a few days. Take care good of the dogs. Feed them meaty treats. And the grass needs cutting. Clean the five bathrooms if you have a chance. For you it’s a vacation.”“Yes mam,” Ernie said.“Here, take this weekender bag. Now take me to the airport.”“Yes, Mrs. Radcliffe.”Ernie, a husky man with a penchant for watching wrestling on television, picked up the bag and toddled to the front door. Mrs. Radcliffe followed him, feeling in her purse for her cell phone and the image there of her airline ticket....

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Dujon’s Symphony of Destiny

Submitted to Contest #299

Once upon a time there lived a donkey named Dujon. He loved to sing and imagined that he would become the greatest singer in the World and the people would crowd in front of his house to hear him sing. The soothsayer who was responsible for instilling this idea in him, also taught him how he should achieve it. He told him to go to a particular temple once every week and bow before the deity to say a prayer. After that he should donate $1 to the deity. Dujon practiced regularly and went to the temple weekly to donate $1. The soothsayer, ho...

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The Sisters

Submitted to Contest #299

There are probably two things you should know about the sisters before you meet them. One, Tara values peace but will never back down from a fight. Two, Samira will never back down from a fight. It was a Saturday morning which means you could sleep in, right? Wrong. The thing about being in high school is that your body will naturally sync up so you’re up before the sun is. Tara dragged her slippers across the cold kitchen tiles and tightly wrapped her red fuzzy blanket around her body as she made her way to the cabinet. Samira had already b...

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