Matthew Eubanks

“Horrors of the Wal Mart Zombie Clearance Aisle” by Matthew Eubanks

Submitted to Contest #151

            For years I had the suspicion that Wal-Mart shoppers were not human. On the horrible day I discovered the truth, it was because I needed Tide desperately. Tide is only sold at Wal-Mart in Southeastern Alabama. I was willing to bear the unbearable. Little did I know where this one small change would lead me. For the record, I am loyal to Costco.          Stepping over discarded cans and trash and climbing over a dirty...

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“First Date” by Matthew Eubanks

Submitted to Contest #78

       It was worse than I could have imagined. Yoga. He's invited me to do yoga with him. Yoga is naptime for adults. It is a formal, complex, expensive way of saying “Sit the fuck down” like they used to do in kindergarten. Namaste, bitch. Hold still.             When he started chatting with me we were in line at the Trader Joe's. There was a Whole Foods on every corner in Denver. Whole Foods offends my southern red meat sensibilities. Trader Jo...

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“Neighbors” by Matthew Eubanks

Submitted to Contest #78

First it was the delivery trucks, then it was the smell. We liked the new neighborhood but the brick house across the road was unbelievable The realtor had said that the suburb was going to be quiet, mostly elderly couples, which was fine with us after moving from the city. I was used to noise, having lived under the elevated train in Chicago all through college. But our first night in the house the curtains and the windows suddenly lit up like O'Hare airport at around 2 AM. I sat straight up in bed. It was like there was a spotlight on me. ...

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“Fresh Cracked Eggs” by Matthew Eubanks

Submitted to Contest #77

In the afternoon it started to snow in an unusual way and at an unusual time. How did Mother used to put it? She would tie up the back of the lace dress and and say, “It takes a soft wind to hear things.” She meant you had to listen hard to hear people's voices. Snow in June was very unusual for Oklahoma but not unheard of. But it made for a barren landscape. Everything would be flat and white for miles. There wasn't much to say about the snow. She sat with Preston on the couch that had holes and didn't say anything because there was not muc...

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“Bogsey Upstream” by Matthew Eubanks

Submitted to Contest #76

 Bogsey had the accident when he was twelve. His dad, Donnie, was teaching him to drive which sounds like a terrible idea, for a twelve year old. But in deep red Oklahoma farm country, sometimes normal people did do that. They sat their kids on their lap and let them turn the steering wheel on country roads. Hill Valley was full of roads like that where you might not see anybody else for an hour and even then they were likely to recognize your car and wave and move out of the way in a big cloud of gravel dust.He was an ugly kid. Nobody ...

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“Rite of Spring” by Matthew Eubanks

Submitted to Contest #75

After they put him under anesthesia for the brain surgery Gerry Lovelace could tell things were not going well. He had been near death once before with an infection and seen the green light and felt the warmth that he now understood to be the next step in dying.Something told him this time he was going to have to decide whether to stay or go. It seemed like dying would be painless, if he chose it this time.But when he started thinking about that Boggs would hit him. Boggs, his father, was there in his sleep, as real as he had ever been.“Put ...

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“Aren’t We A Pair” by Matthew Eubanks

Boobie Brown the Cowboy Clown hung up the phone and started to cry tears of joy. Nostalgia filled his heart and makeup ran down his nose and his heart felt like the man who fired the cannon at the circus had finally shot his soul through the top of the tent. It had finally happened. Teddy, his boy, his boy had called and wanted to meet him and give him some news and today was the day. He hadn't said it yet but Boobie knew what it was without anyone telling him. Teddy had been accepted to clown college, where Boobie had longed ...

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“Elise, Of My Memory” by Matthew Eubanks

Submitted to Contest #68

Talil sat holding the child on top of the roof while the sun rose. The girl was wrapped in a blanket, still hanging on to sleep. He felt her protuding ribs through the blanket. The wind had started to pick up and sandy desert air was rising from the street below.The girl had small bones, a child's face, limbs and arms and freckles. Brown ringlets of hair hung in front of her face and wavered like reeds with her breath. The two of them were hidden because the sun had not yet risen but they would have to move soon. He had brought her here desp...

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“An Opening” by Matthew Eubanks

Submitted to Contest #67

My first memory of my father was of his hands, the big callouses and gnarly palms, and smooth tiny metal latches, the dim evening in the barn and the way the evening came on. My father's money came from crafting keys, gun stocks, and figurines. But his love, secretly, were boxes, the turning of keys, the opening of secrets.    Men brought us the boxes for one reason or another. Mostly they were desperate, rich men on horseback coming from far away, bringing jewelry boxes with twisted latches, family heirlooms locked insid...

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“Descent” by Matthew Eubanks

Submitted to Contest #66

“Something's wrong with the pumping station,” Tadia said. Her eye was fixated on a blinking red light. The rest of the panel was cold and black.   Irvine Cobb looked up from the alarm and out at the barren lunar surface. It had turned gray as the sun passed but it would soon be lit up in warm yellows when the sun rose.   Tadia swore under her breath. In twenty four hours she was scheduled to see her children and husband on Pisces 1, have dinner, watch the water flow from orbit into the lunar lake they had spent a year p...

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“Neighbors” by Matthew Eubanks

Submitted to Contest #65

I woke up to a warm body in my bed. It was Billy. He looked up at me in his spider-man pajamas and he said “DAD I’M SO SORRY BUT THERE IS A GOD DAMNED WAREWOLF LIVING DOWN THE STREET.” Billy was my shy kid. All he wanted to do was read. Molly, the mother of my kids, had ended up in alcohol rehab three months ago. We decided the boys and I would move to Florida while she finished treatment in North Dakota. The situation was terrible for both the boys, but especially Billy. He was terrified of strangers.  I said, “First of all I don’t l...

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“Justice” by Matthew Eubanks

Submitted to Contest #64

It's the same routine every night that saves me from insanity. We sit by the window while she rocks and stares. I make sure she has blankets. Grandmother Pearl always sleeps till morning. When her eyes close, I'm gone, out the back door, closing the white gate softly. Only a few blocks from the house the world of streetlights and asphalt ends and the trail that leads to Hartselle Woods begins. What begins as a paved trail for tourists that branches off the highway quickly becomes the darkness and the quiet that I need. I leave...

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“Aphid” by Matthew Eubanks

Submitted to Contest #63

By the time I stepped outside, the leaves were on fire. Reds and golds everywhere. The most beautiful fall I had ever seen. It had been a week since I had been outdoors.Everything started with the algae on the roads. Do you remember that? Big clumps of that filmy moss everywhere. It shut down traffic. Nobody could explain what was causing it or where it came from. It would tear up your tires. They said it was safe but I always coughed around it. The President came on and said, we'll spray for it, we'll take care of it, and they came around w...

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“Sleepless Bear and the Magic Apples” by Matthew Eubanks

Submitted to Contest #63

To My Favorite Sleepless Bear, The day I first saw you, Aunt Tilda whispered in my ear the secret of the magic apples. You were just a little furry cute thing then. But Tilda Bird said, don't listen to what the men say. That bear is entrusted to you, and you alone. He's a small bear, and you're a small bird. So you have to stick together. When I saw the sun I realized I hadn't paid attention. I should have remembered you'd be going to hibernate today. I'm so sorry. It's my job to watch out for you. I'm supposed to bring you magic apples, t...

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“Sheol” by Matthew Eubanks

Submitted to Contest #62

There was fighting from the other side of the door about what kind of funeral the family would have. I listened for a few minutes as a woman's voice swung from raging fury to a sort of logical masochism. She moved from chaos to militant order, from weeping to the casket to the flowers and food for mourners.Then I heard a man's voice say, “He's not going to be dead. We don't need a funeral.”The woman on the other side started crying again. They cannot choose. The choice is impossible.The room I had been summoned to was at the far end of the I...

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