Brian Bywater

Author on Reedsy Prompts since Jun, 2022

Stories (14)

14 Stories

274 karma pts

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“The Language of FOOD” by Brian Bywater

The  LANGUAGE of FOOD “Well?’ “You do this every time we go out to dinner, rush, rush, rush. No wonder you get indigestion. I have only just started to read the menu. ” “I cannot wait for the day we find a restaurant with only two items on the menu and one is marked ‘not availabl...

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“IT'S AN AGE THING” by Brian Bywater

IT”S AN AGE THING 7pm August 13th 2022 Mission Beach State School Have I forgotten anything I ask myself, for the umpteenth time? Umpteenth, how many is that? Does it r...

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“For the Want of a Nail” by Brian Bywater

FOR THE WANT OF A NAIL The Ancient Mariner said ‘Water water everywhere and all the boards did shrink, water water everywhere nor any a drop to drink. How can that be? I hear you ask, well the reason is not what you think. The tap came off in the kitchen the one over the washing up sink

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“The Root of all Evil. Money. Really?” by Brian Bywater

The Root of all Evil, Money. Really?? “Has the jury reached a verdict?” the sombre baritone voice of Judge Percy Edgeware echoes through the deathly silent courtroom. “Yes, and no your Honour.” “I do not recall offering that as an option Mr Foreman. Please explain.” Judge Percy i...

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“There is Nothing Funny About Murder” by Brian Bywater

There is Nothing Funny about Murder  The Sixth Sense Some days have a way of enforcing you should not have decided to get out of bed. From the time his office door opens, admitting a man he would come to know as Joseph H Pomeroy, TJ Scobie is overwhelmed by the recognition, this is definitely one of those days. ...

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“Green statistrically not Good” by Brian Bywater

Green, statistically not Good I regret doing it, I am aware striking a Politician is frowned upon. I have apologised, just give me the opportunity to explain Officer. My job was the cause. Without that none of it would have happened. At least that is what I tell myself. Over and ...

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“SPOT THE DIFFERENCE” by Brian Bywater

SPOT the DIFFERENCE I am not jealous, I am envious. Jealousy is when you worry someone will take what you have. Envy is wanting what someone else has. What I feel is envy. Homer Simpson. “You are not...

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“My Hippocampus is not Working” by Brian Bywater

My Hippocampus is not working. Don’t you remember Eric? I do not remember an Eric. Of course only you could put that down to my having a  selective memory. You are saying he was the one who beat me at Chess every time we played. I’m sure only George could ever beat me in those days. My memory of ever actually pl...

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“LIE LIES and DAMN STATISTICS” by Brian Bywater

LIES LIES DAMN the  STATISTICS “You are wrong. It is an urban myth, it did not actually happen that way.” “That shows how much, or how little would be closer to the truth, you do know. I spoke to Roland yesterday, He should know, he owned the crocodile farm we are talking about.”...

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“The True Meaning” by Brian Bywater

The True Meaning “You interrupt everything. You cannot help yourself can you? A simple story I am telling about watching one of the most famous Baseball players ever, and you have to interrupt. You know somewhere between little and nothing about the sport. Have you ever watched a game? Answer no. So when I tell you that I think Joe DiMaggio’s  sweetest swing was ar...

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“An ASSESSMENT of TIME” by Brian Bywater

AN ASSESSMENT OF TIME “We are running out of time Jed.’ “No Marcia, we are not. The Bank does not open until ten am. The Manager does not arrive until ten fifteen. By then we are fully set up waiting for him to open the main safe so we can make our withdrawal. It has to be the main safe. The smaller one the head teller opens ...

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“NOT RELEVANT” by Brian Bywater

NOT RELEVANT It is definitely time to take some affirmative action and I know exactly what I will do, I’ll sit him down and talk to him about my concerns. Perhaps if I run through it my mind I might be able to anticipate his objections. Oh and doesn’t he have a way of directing the conversation. How will I begin? Let’s try this to g...

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“HATCHETS and PEACE PIPES” by Brian Bywater

HATCHETS and PEACE PIPES  “Well well!! The last person I expected to see darkening the portals of my home was you. What brings you here after all the years? And before you ask the answer is no, I will not lend you any money. Actually from past experience the meaning of the word ‘lend’ is not within your grasp. It means you have to pay it back." “I’m...

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“The Eyes Have it.” by Brian Bywater

I can see it now but it wasn't always that way. My mother, rather than shower me with the necessities of life, handed down an hereditary corneal dystrophy. My father, whose biggest achievement was meeting Queen Elizabeth in 1954, put my eyesight problem down to masturbating far too often. As my eyesight problem was evident at age two, it became obvious the genes passed down included his own masturbation excesses. ...

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Shortlisted 1 story ⭐️

Contest #155
The True Meaning – read story