All In All, A Good Night

ALL IN ALL, A GOOD NIGHT 

Ro and Catey were sitting on Ro’s front porch, an expensive vellum envelope on the table between them. More importantly, though, an empty wine bottle sat between two empty wine glasses.

“I’ll get us another. I’m not sure — are we celebrating or commiserating?”

Catey snorted. “I’m not sure, either. But either way, we need more wine.”

When Ro returned with a lovely bottle of Pino Noir, she filled both of their glasses, perhaps a little fuller than usual, but desperate times call for desperate measures. Putting the bottle down, she picked up the envelope.

“You got one, too?”

“Yup.” 

Catey took her envelop out of her purse, waving it at Ro. Both envelopes were handwritten in lovely script.

“I’m pretty sure that wasn’t written by Jeb,” said Ro.

“Or Fanny,” said Catey.

“They probably hired someone to do it for them.”

“Probably.”

She looked at the front of the envelop closer.  

“I notice they didn’t mail these, so they had them hand-delivered. Fancy.”

Ro gently lifted the back flap of the envelop. An envelope this lovely deserved to be opened with care. When was the last time she’d received anything printed on vellum?  

About a million years ago, she thought.

 She removed the articles within — tissue paper, save-the-date card, tissue paper, invitation, tissue paper, RSVP card, and more tissue paper.

“Wow. They’re single-handedly reviving the tissue paper industry,” said Ro, looking in the envelope.

“Fanny told me she’s trying to recreate their original wedding, but with more money, this time,” said Catey.  

Ro sighed.  “With the same guest list?” she asked, dreading the answer.

“Yup,” said Casey. “The same guest list. Plus about a billion other people.”

Jeb and Fanny had been married at eighteen. Fanny wasn’t pregnant, and Jeb wasn’t joining the military. They just loved each other that much. And, it had been nauseating. All the PDAs, all the time. Ro had actually been surprised that Fanny wasn’t pregnant, considering all the time they spent canoodling.  

Ro and Catey had been invited to the original wedding. It had been pretty small — small by this new ceremony’s standards — about eighty people. For some reason, Jeb and Fanny had invited the entire graduating class, including their teachers. It didn’t matter if you were friends with them or not, you were invited. Catey and Ro were part of Jeb and Fanny’s larger group, so they knew the bride and groom fairly well.

The first wedding had been a pretty good — almost like another graduation prom, but without the pressure of having to have a date. Everyone had fun. Only a few of the usual suspects got totally hammered, making fools of themselves. But this was before the internet and social media, so the indiscretions only lived on in the memories of those who had attended.

Ro started unwrapping the packet from the envelope, gently removing the first layer of tissue paper.  

“Save the Date? Isn’t the acronym for that STD? If I remember correctly, that is exactly what we wanted to avoid in high school?”

Catey snorted.

“I think you’re supposed to actually refer to it as ‘Save the Date,’ not by its acronym.”

Ro thought for a moment. “Huh. I guess I’m getting old.”

She continued to unpack the invitation.  

“I can’t believe that it’s been forty years,” she said, looking at the invitation.

“I can’t believe that they stayed together for forty years,” said Catey.

Ro read the invitation aloud.

Forty years is a long time.  

So long, in fact, that we think it’s time to renew our vows.

We’d be honoured if you would join us 

On June 17, 2023 at 7:00 p.m.

At the Central Community Centre 

(Locale of the original ceremony). 

Best wishes only.

— Love Jeb and Fanny xo

Neither Ro nor Catey had been particularly lucky in love. Ro had been married for almost twenty-five years, but the year she turned fifty she realized that she had better things to do than look after her aging man-child of a husband, Roscoe. Roscoe, not surprisingly, couldn’t figure out what had gotten into Ro.

“Is this the menopause talking?” he’d asked.  

It was at that exact moment that Ro knew she’d made the right decision to leave.

“Do you think Roscoe’s going to attend?” asked Catey.  Roscoe had been part of the graduating class.

“Who knows?” said Ro. “Probably, unless he’s got some sort he-man activity lined up, like wrestling alligators.” She paused. “But, yeah, he’ll probably attend. He still believes that his high school years were the best years of his life.”

Roscoe had been part of the jock group at school. They were a popular group — girls liked to be around them, and guys wanted to be like them. At the time, Ro had had no interest in Roscoe or his buddies. They were jerks and bullies 

It wasn’t until later, after university, that Ro and Roscoe had reconnected. He’d inherited his parents’ car dealership, and Ro was looking for a new car. They struck up a friendship, and Roscoe had pursued Ro doggedly. Flowers, small gifts, dates, fancy dinners. It was a whirlwind. And, Ro had to admit, begrudgingly, that she had been flattered. When he’d asked her to marry him, she was swept away by the grand gesture — a giant ring in a dessert at the best restaurant in town, friends and family in attendance. She’d said yes. And then, later, when all the hubbub had died down, she had her doubts. Was she doing the right thing? The wasn’t sure she was. Roscoe was a jock, right down to his, well, jock strap. Anything that was guy-based, or team based was what Roscoe loved. Just not home-based.

They got married in a lavish ceremony that Roscoe’s parents paid for. Nothing was too good for their only child. They bought Roscoe and Ro’s house — no starter home for their Roscoe. Much to Ro’s chagrin, though, their new house was right next door to Roscoe’s parents’ house.  

Three kids later, an interfering mother-in-law, an absent man-child husband, and Ro was exhausted. And angry. And resentful. But she persevered. The kids grew up, mostly normal, and left the nest to pursue their own lives. Then Ro turned fifty, and examined her own life. Sure, she had a great job she loved — she was a tenured professor at the university — but was her job enough? She told Roscoe that she wanted to travel, to see the world. She explained to him that there was so much out there that they hadn’t seen, and time was ticking down. She wanted them to go places.

Roscoe had said, “Uh huh,” never taking his eyes off of the five-pin bowling tournament on ESPN3.

“Are you listening to me?”

“Yeah, sure hon. You want to go on vacation.  

“I want us to go on vacation. Together.”  

When the kids were younger, they’d done very little travelling — mostly short camping trips, Disney, visiting Ro’s parents on the west coast. But nothing since then. Now they were older, had more disposable income. It was the perfect time. Unfortunately, Roscoe did not share her desire.

“It’s not a good time. You should go with Catey. She’s fun.”

And that was the proverbial straw that broke the proverbial camel’s back. Within two weeks Ro filed for divorce and moved out.  

Catey’s story was more tragic. Gill, her husband had been a party boy during college. You know, the life of the party. Everybody’s best friend. Always ready to go the next happening. Even though Catey was involved Neil, a boy from school, who was away attending another university, she was enamoured with Good-Time-Gill.  

Catey was never unfaithful to Neil, but they grew apart, and by the end of second year they decided to go their separate ways that summer. Eventually she and Gill got together, and one thing lead to another, and they were married just after they graduated. Gill got a job in the entertainment industry, and the couple moved to L.A. They were the golden couple. They had it all — beautiful house, new cars, threw fantastic parties, travelled the world.  

Even though they had no children, Gill insisted that Catey stay at home and not work. Successful men did not have wives who worked, he said. Catey was a trained landscape architect, and she wanted to work, but pressure from Gill prevented her from pursuing her dream. The years went by, and Gill’s star continued to rise. So did his drinking. Good-Time-Gill turned into Drunken-Gill, then into Abusive-Gill.  

The first time he hit her, she fled back to her mom and dad. Gill followed, and swore he would never touch her again, if she would only forgive him.

“You have to go to rehab,” said Catey.

Gill was horrified.  

“What if people find out?” he whined. “I’ll be blackballed.

“You’ll be divorced if you don’t,” said Catey.

Gill could tell that she was serious. Into rehab he went.

But it didn’t take. Nor did the next time, nor the time after that. By the time he was fifty-three, his drinking was taking a toll on his job. And Catey.  

They separated, and Catey got a place of her own in LA. Her plans were to file for divorce, and move back home. Although her dad had died, her mom was still alive, and told Catey she could live with her. Catey had taken courses and kept current with the trends in landscape architecture, and planned to get a job in her field. She was fifty-two and knew she would probably have a hard time, but she was willing to put in the work. She had the divorce papers drawn up and delivered to Gill. She was packing up, getting ready for her move home when there was a knock on the door. It was the police.

Gill had been driving drunk, on his way to beg Catey to take him back, and had struck another car with two UCLA students, both of whom had died at the scene. Gill had survived.

Gill was arrested. The parents of the two students sued, and were each awarded ten million dollars. Catey was determined to pay the families of the two people Gill had killed. She started to liquidate their holdings. But, she quickly found that their luxurious lifestyle was built on a house of cards. Their mortgage was huge. There was a second mortgage. The cars were leased. Their place in Florida and their place in New York were both mortgaged to the hilt. In the end, Catey was forced to file for bankruptcy. She returned to her childhood home broke, alone, and traumatized.

It was her friendship with Ro that brought her back to the world of the living. Two single women heading towards senior citizen-ship together, heads held high.

Now, in the face of their failed marriages, they were being invited to attend the renewal of the vows of two friends with an amazing marriage and life together. Neither was thrilled. Nothing quite as sobering as success in the face of failure.

Catey reached for the wine, and filled up their glasses. Both women drank hardily.

“We should go,” said Catey.

Yeah,” said Ro, “But any PDA, and I’m outta there.”

So it was settled. Both women would attend. They sent off their RSVP cards.

It was still three months until the “event,” and both women went about their lives, and mostly forgot about it. Until Catey called Ro to reminder her.

“Shit!” said Ro. “I completely forgot. I haven’t got anything to wear.” She paused. “What does one wear to a renewing of the vows?” She rummaged through her desk, and pulled out the envelope and riffled through the contents. “Here it is — cocktail attire.”

“Damn!” said Catey. “I either sold or donated all of my party clothes. Not much call for getting dressed up when your job includes playing in the dirt. I’m going to have to get something as well.”

Saturday came, and they headed out to the venue wearing new outfits. The wether was perfect, and the ceremony was held outside. Fanny wore her original wedding dress, and looked amazing. There was more of Jeb now than there had been forty years ago, so he settled on a new suit.  

Both Catey and Ro had to admit it was a lovely ceremony. They went into the community centre for the dinner.  

“Wow!” said Catey. “The place is amazing.

Ro looked around. They must have spent a fortune transforming the aging community centre gym into a dazzling wedding wonderland.

“They even covered the gym floor!” cooed Catey.  

They looked around, and found their table.

“Shit! Shit! Shit!” said Ro.

Of course Roscoe was sitting at their table. Before Ro could change the seating plan, Roscoe sauntered in with his buddy Doug. Ro had never liked Doug, but he and Roscoe were tight.

“Ro-Bust!” called Doug.

“Are you kidding me?” she said. “You’re almost sixty, and you’re still calling me Ro-Bust?”

“Yup. And they are looking fine!” he said staring at her chest.

Ro turned to Roscoe.  

“Really? Make him stop.”

Roscoe just chuckled.  

While not being able to switch tables, Ro did put Roscoe and Doug on the other side of the table, behind the centrepiece, so that she didn’t have to look at their stupid faces.

The other people arrived at the table. Ro and Catey knew all of them from high school, but had not seen most of them since 1983. Last to arrive was Neil — Catey’s Neil. And, his seat was right beside Catey.

She looked at Ro, panic in her eyes.

“Don’t worry,” said Ro, reassuringly. “It’s going to be fine. You’ve got this.”

“I hope so.”

Dinner was almost fun. Everyone at the table chatted and got caught up. When someone asked Catey if she was married, she just said no, she was divorced. Ro pointed at Roscoe and said “Not any more.”

After dinner and speeches, there was dancing. Ro travelled around to the different tables, and greeted her old school mates. Most looked like her — fifty-eight. But there were a few — both women and men — who had succumbed to the lure of plastic surgery and botox. One guy, Denis Fontaine, who had been in Ro’s biology class, had had so much botox that she couldn’t tell if he was enjoying their conversation — his face didn’t move. There were a few plumped up lips, and a few facelifts, but all in all, as a group, they looked good for their age

Ro danced with a few acquaintances, and a few high school crushes. Every time she looked around, she found Catey and Neil deep in conversation. She figured that they had a lot to catch up on.  

Ro even danced with Roscoe. It had been eight years since she had walked away and they hadn’t really kept in touch. Sure, they saw each other at things for the kids, but nothing outside of that.

“So, how you doing?” she asked.

“Well,” he said, “I’m seeing someone.”

For just a second Ro felt a small twinge. Then she pictured Roscoe sitting in his recliner in the basement, intently watching five-pin bowling on television, when she needed to have a serious conversation with him, and the feeling immediately disapated.

“Anyone I know?” she asked.

“Doug.”

“Doug?”

“Yup, Doug.”

While initially surprised, she wasn’t shocked.  

“So …” she said.

“Yeah, I guess I owe you an apology.”

“Twenty-five years is a long time, you know, to be married a woman when you’re gay.”

“True. But I really didn’t realize what I needed until after the divorce. Before that, I was just doing what was expected of me — get married, have kids. It didn’t make me happy, but that was what I thought I was supposed to do.”

“Huh. Have you told the kids yet?”

“Nope. I figured I should tell you first.”

“Thank you for that.”

For the first time in years, or maybe ever, Ro and Roscoe had an intimate conversation about their wants and needs. Neither regretted any of the decisions that they had made — they had three amazing kids — and that was what was important to both of them.

“I’m just sorry that you wasted twenty-five years with me, instead of being your authentic self.”

“I’m not. If you hadn’t left, then I may not have ever found my true self. So thank you.”

Ro and Roscoe hugged — really hugged — for the first time in years.

Ro and Catey had made plans to leave together. They had ordered an Uber earlier in the evening, and Ro had just received a notification that it was on the way.

“Uber’s on the way,” she said, interrupting Catey and Neil.

Catey looked from Ro to Neil.

“Uh, Neil’s going to drive me home.”

Ro broke out in a huge smile. Finally! Catey had not been with a man since Gill had gone to prison.

“No probs!” she said. “What was it that we used to say? ‘Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do?’” She smiled again. “Give me a call tomorrow. Or whenever.”

All in all, the evening had been a success. Jeb and Fanny had been fantastic hosts. Ro had renewed old friendships, and made a couple of new ones. She’d had the best talk that she had ever had with Roscoe. And, it looked like Catey was revisiting an old romance.  

All in all, a good night, all ‘round.