Nothing but a Dream

Lia walked out of the soiree early, her long skirts dragging behind her. She probably looked as deflated as she felt. She had snuck into this party for nothing. Did she truly think that the night could be as magical as she imagined? Those fantasies only existed in dreams. How stupid was she to think that a fancy dress would change what she really was? A simple girl with no title or fortune. She dragged in a deep breath, the warm summer air stifling. 

As she released her breath, a slow waltz began playing from inside. Instinctively, her feet began to move in time to the beat. She closed her eyes and began to imagine what it would feel like to dance with another. One who wasn't just her father. Would it be as splendid as the other society women made it sound? She imagined so.

Her mood shifted somberly. 

Would she never find a love of the books? Perhaps that kind of love didn’t exist. But how could one write such tales unless they had experienced it for themselves or witnessed it in others? She had witnessed it in others; why couldn’t she find it herself? 

She knew she was poor, but even the poor can find love amongst themselves. She saw it in her mother and father. One day she would have what they did. 

She imagined what it would be like to waltz with her one. The one who would pull her close and never let go. 

She imagined her hand slipping into his; his arm around her waist. She could almost feel the heat of his body next to hers. Moving in time with her steps. She felt a smile tug at her lips. The smell of mint leaves caused her to draw in another deep breath. Something tugged at her consciousness. Lia’s mind was drawn to the fact that the hand in her own was not imaginary but real. Her eyes flew open and her steps came to an abrupt halt. 

A pair of green eyes met her own brown. 

“Oh, my,” Lia gasped. She took in the very real man standing before her. 

His lips quirked in a grin. “I’m quite sorry, but I could not help myself.” His eyes danced around her face. “My mother always told me I was much too straightforward.” 

“Oh?” Lia felt frozen. Like she was in a dream. Perhaps it was. 

He breathed a laugh. “I am incredibly sorry for ruining your moment.”

“Oh, you didn’t.” Oh, certainly not at all. She met his skeptical expression. “Truly.” She smiled at him the tune of the waltz drifting their way. 

He bowed to her and held out a hand. “I suppose I ought to have asked you properly to dance.” He looked up at her. “Could I have this dance?”

Before she could think, Lia found her hand in his. “You may.” She counted in her head, One, two three. One, two, three. They began moving at the same time, their steps perfectly in sync. Lia felt as though she were floating. She let herself be pulled closer and she breathed in his minty scent, not wanting to forget it. She squeezed his hand tighter and closed her eyes. She could stay in this moment forever. They felt so right together. 

***

Ingram couldn’t believe she had let him dance with her. Any other girl would have him hanged. But this girl. There was something in her that was different than the other women he had met. He hadn’t realized until this moment that he was holding a weight on his shoulders. Being with her felt so freeing. He felt so light. Lighter than in his greatest dream. 

She gave him the feeling that he could do anything; including be with her. With that thought, he pushed all his worries to the back of his mind, tugging her another inch closer. He imagined himself asking her to dance with him again. His heart gave a tug at the thought. 

Is this what falling in love felt like? He might never know. 

He thought of his parents. He knew they had never married for love. He was always given what he wanted growing up, but he longed for a true family. With his longing for a true family came a secret longing for someone he would love. He did not want to live the rest of his life with someone he did not want to truly be with. Ah, but even those thoughts were something of a dream. 

 He remembered a time in his youth when he snuck out and spied through the window of a home belonging to someone of a lower class. The mother had just gotten her children to sleep, and her husband pulled her close and danced with her. He remembered the hope it had given him. Now he wished he had never left his home. He wished he was never given hope. 

He ought to have realized sooner that he would never hold his dream in his hand. Oh, but to touch it. To touch his dream made it all the more painful. 

***

Lia felt his change in mood just seconds before he pulled away. 

She held onto his hands. “What’s wrong?” She studied his face. His jaw was clenched. The lines of his face were drawn tight in agony. 

“I-I am sorry. I should never have danced with you. No matter how wondrous it was.” He swallowed. “I should not even be out here with a lady alone. Anyone could come looking for us, and my-my fianceé might break our engagement.”

Lia jerked back as though she were burned. “Fianceé?” 

His expression turned to one of determination. Determination to hold to tradition. “I am doing what is best for all of us.” His words fell flat. 

She shook her head in dismay. Of course, he would choose the easy way out. 

Something inside her crashed. The darkness she had been trying to tamp down spilled out. Of course, he was engaged. She couldn’t believe her naïveté. 

Lia clenched her jaw pushing her emotions down. Hope is always in vain. 

    He was talking, but she heard none of his words over her resolve. She would forget him. She would. And in the future, this moment would be nothing but a dream to her.  

She ought to have known from the beginning. 

All dreams must come to an end.