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Bedtime Contemporary Fiction

There were only two men sitting at the bar. They were well-engaged in conversation and did not take any interest in the crowd of people that had come in and sat down since they had first arrived. They were sitting at the end of the bar, admiring the many lit up skyscrapers the view had to offer at night. Enigmatic lines in the floor turned the back-half of the room purple, turning into a bright rust color around the bar. The bartenders were busy pouring and mixing and serving and running around so all the people in the bar could get the confidence they had ordered. Huddled in separate groups, the people collectively talked and laughed and were serious and oblivious to what everyone else was saying around them.

One of the men, a young, yet tired-faced man, while looking out the window at the skyline asked:

“What do you think most people are doing right now?”

“Easy. Drinking,” his friend answered.

“Why?”

“They want to live happy lives.”

The tired-faced man turned around and looked at all the people congregating. Some of their faces were lit up by the white screens of their smartphones, others sipped their fruitfully colored drinks through two little black straws. They smiled at the people they wanted something from, and laughed at jokes they didn’t hear.

“I’m feelin’ a bit sick. I think I’m gonna head out,” the tired-faced man said.

“You feelin’ sick? Have a Pinot Grigio. That will cure ya right up.”

“Ah, no. I need to get some air.”

“Maybe I’ll come with you. It’s gettin a bit stuffy in here for me too.”

“Don’t be stupid. Go meet some strangers and have fun.”

“Very few people meet strangers spontaneously anymore, you know that. What’re you gonna do?”

“I think I might go to bed early.”

“You think too much,” his friend frankfully stated. “It worries me. You know that I know you’re not going to bed early. I read online that thinking too much is bad for your health; “Like smokin’ a pack of cigarettes every day.” I’ve seen a lot of people fall into the abyss because they use that mind of ours a little too much. What they don’t realize is it wasn’t meant to be used all the time. When the hunter-gatherers were done hunting and gathering for the day, they relaxed and spent time with each other. What they did back then is exactly the same thing most people are doing today. We work and then we relax afterwards. They looked at the stars together and we drink together. It’s basic evolutionary psychology. We as humans have been doing this for millions of years. Life is fun when we talk to other humans late into the night. It’s boring, and might I add, sad, when we spend life alone in our room sulking over the unknowns of the universe.”

“Yea I know. It’s not that. I just need some sleep.”

“It’s the cat!” the friend interjected.

“What?”

“Ever since you got that new cat, you’ve been spending a lot less time out.”

The tired-faced man looked away from his friend and back out the window at the skyscrapers. 

“Don’t look out the window!”

The tired-faced man turned around.

“Let’s go somewhere. Let’s get a group of people and let's go to the Caribbean. What’d you say to that?”

“I don’t know. Vacationing in the Caribbean's pretty expensive.”

“No it’s not. Didn’t you hear? It’s the poor Americans' Mediterranean.”

“We’re poor?”

“Do you have to go to the office on Monday?” the friend said with a laugh. “Poor in time, indeed.”

The tired-faced man looked around at the crowd: young, lively, fresh faces.

“Aren’t people in their thirties supposed to still be young?” he asked.

“See, you look at the world in the wrong way. To be quite frank, you look at the world in a negative way. This is why you spend all your free time with your new cat. You shouldn’t be looking at those who are younger and going “how do I get back there?” What you should be asking yourself is “What do I know that they don’t? What experiences have I had that they haven’t?” You see? It’s all about framing your mindset.”

The tired-faced man looked at him, but said nothing.

“We’re thirty-six and single. Never married and no kids. Society says that’s bad, right? But there’s no intrinsic value in what society says. Society can and will keep talking nonsense because that's what society does. The intelligent thoughts sink to the bottom and the bullshit thoughts float to the top.”

The tired-faced man looked away from his friend and towards the pretty bartender.

“Hey, if you don’t want to talk to me, and if you won’t flirt with her, we can call it a night and you can go and spend time with your new cat. But let me just say this. The cat won’t bring you happiness. Pets are awesome, but not as awesome as humans.”

“Yea, but this cat…”

“He speaks! But this cat what?”

“It understands me. And I understand him.”

They stared into each other's eyes for a brief moment. The tired-faced man's friend then turned and grabbed his Pinot Grigio off the bartop. He put what was left in the wine glass down his throat in one gulp. Then, turning back to the conversation:

“What does that even mean? I’m starting to think this is a prank. Are there cameras around here,” the friend said looking around the bar and up at the ceiling. “What do you mean man?”

“I mean we understand each other.”

“I need more than that.”

“Like,” he said under his breath, “We emotionally understand each other. We understand each other's feelings. We get one another. Like the therapy dogs that go to schools after shootings; I have a therapy cat. You understand what I’m saying don’t you?”

At this, the friend started to laugh heavily. The tired-faced man stood up and put two twenties down on the bartop.

As the tired-faced man made his exit:

“Wine! It’s good for your mental health!” his friend at the bar yelled to him. No one heard what he said though. They were all too busy smiling at the people they wanted something from, and laughing at jokes they didn’t hear.


February 27, 2023 03:05

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4 comments

Hanae Livingston
05:36 Mar 14, 2023

I enjoyed your vivid imagery; you set a great scene. There's one section where you switch up the pronouns used in mid-sentence: "they use that mind of ours a little too much." When at the end of the story, the tired man is ignored/drowned out by the crowd, I think there is a great opportunity there to emphasize the man's loneliness. Show his isolation with some significant detail: his posture, his face, how others move around him in the crowd. Overall, a lovely read and wonderful social commentary.

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Alexander Hanna
20:35 Mar 14, 2023

Thank you for reading my story. And thank you for the suggestions. I wish we had more than a week to write and edit these stories, but I guess the little amount of time we have to write these stories is what makes this so challenging and rewarding!

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DAVID Beeson
19:52 Mar 09, 2023

Interesting effort at depicting loneliness. Be careful with pronouns. Not all made sense. Also, I found you strained to set the scene. That was distracting. "Enigmatic lines" is an example.

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Alexander Hanna
04:48 Mar 11, 2023

Thank you for reading my story and the constructive criticism. I always want to make my writing better. Also, what pronouns didn't make sense so I don't make the same mistake?

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