The Baader-Meinhof Girl

Kevin didn't believe in coincidences. His heart, however, wanted to believe. He could feel his pulse throbbing throughout his entire body. Even his fingertips seemed to be twitching to the beat of his spooked nervous system. He hadn't gotten out of bed that morning expecting anything, but seeing Sarah at the grocery store was a spectacular surprise.

A bolt of lightning jolted through his chest. She was looking right at him. His scalp tightened and a cold sweat beaded up along his brow. He winced. It was supposed to be a smile. He tried again. Was he doing it right? How does a smile feel? he wondered, just as she began walking toward him. The rest of the store and the din of its patrons faded. His mind raced.

A hoard of memories began dogpiling him, knocking the wind from his chest. Both to his horror and relief, she veered off the collision course with him and made her way to the exit.

He panicked. I'll never see her again, he thought. He could still feel the rhythmic thumping of his heart in his temples. She was gone. Just the ghost of a memory, drifting away.

Kevin made his way through the self checkout and got in his car, still lost in thought. He had just been thinking about Sarah that morning. He'd had a dream about her, then he'd stumbled on an old yearbook and opened it to find where she'd signed it.

"We had a great year. I wish we could have gotten to know each other better. Best of luck Kevin! <3 Sarah"

Five years later and he'd almost entirely forgotten about her. Then one afternoon at the grocery store she zipped through like a race car leaving nothing but a trail of exhaust and a smear of bright colors.

He put the car in reverse and lifted his foot off the brake pedal. He was suddenly jerked back to reality when his car rocked violently and he slammed on the brake again. He could feel a throbbing headache coming on as he got out of the car rolling his eyes. He'd been too lost in thought, too distracted.

Kevin's heart stopped abruptly. Sarah was climbing out of the other vehicle, the one he had just backed into. A tsunami of embarrassment crashed over him.

"Oh no," she was saying, examining the damage he'd done to her rear bumper. She looked up at him expectantly, but immediately her eyes widened. "Kevin?" she asked incredulously.

He wanted to die. Instead he tried again to smile, but it hurt and he grimaced with a hint of deep, overwhelming shame. "Hey Sarah," he said weakly.

"Oh my gosh," she said. "I haven't seen you in ages."

"Yeah," he sighed, grabbing the back of his neck to make sure his head wouldn't fly away. "Hey, I'm really sorry about this," he gestured to the collision. "I have great insurance though, and I'm sure they'll take care of everything."

She glanced back down at the point of impact and shrugged. "It's fine. I don't think there was any real damage done. It's mostly cosmetic."

"Still," he said. "I want to make sure it gets taken care of. Let me take down your details and I'll get it all sorted out."

She raised her eyebrows a moment, then let out a long sigh. "Alright," she said, pulling out her cell phone.

Kevin awkwardly turned and scooted into place by her side, pulling his own phone out. "You can just give me your number and I'll text you..." he began.

She looked over at him and her eyes darted down to his hands just as she fumbled her phone.

Instinctively Kevin's foot shot out just in time to break the phone's fall. It was a move he'd performed a hundred times on his own phone. The corner of the device struck his foot hard. It hurt, but he also knew the screen was a lot less likely to crack now. Quickly he bent over to retrieve it, failing to notice that she was doing the same. Their heads made sharp, sudden contact.

"Ow!" Sarah exclaimed, laughing as she palmed the bruise he'd given her.

Kevin hesitated, then snatched the phone off the ground and stood up again, trying to figure out what kind of awful, contorted look he might have on his face now. "Here," he said, handing her the phone.

She chuckled daintily. "Thanks."

"I'm off to a great start here," he remarked, immediately regretting it. Start of what, exactly? he challenged himself angrily. "Can I..." he paused, his stomach twisting into a pretzel. He glanced over at her and their eyes met. He sighed. "I'll give you my number," he offered. "You can text me."

She nodded and unlocked her phone. He rattled off his number, watching intently as she entered the digits, then politely excused himself. "I'll look forward to hearing from you," he said stupidly. "So that I can get my insurance company to fix that for you," he added, nodding at her bumper.

"Sure," she said. "Alright. Well, good luck today," she offered, climbing back into her car.

He watched her pull away with a massive dent in her bumper. He took a deep breath and held it, then let it explode into an exasperated groan. Holding his head in his hands he growled at himself. "I'll look forward to hearing from you?" he cried. "Really Kevin? What is wrong with you?"

Kevin put his car back in reverse, looked carefully over his shoulder, and backed the rest of the way out of his parking spot. Did I really almost try to invite her to dinner after crashing into her? he thought disdainfully. He drove home in a daze, shaking his head in shame and occasionally shouting, "I'm so stupid!" while slapping the steering wheel.

Eventually he pulled into his parking spot at the apartment complex where he'd lived since graduating college last year. He took another deep breath, closed his eyes, and tried to clear his mind. His imagination was a wildfire, completely consumed by the idea of Sarah. "Just let her go Kevin," he said aloud, turning off the car.

Then his heart jumped. In the rear view mirror he caught a glimpse of Sarah walking by.

"No way," he breathed. He got out of the car and she stopped in her tracks.

"Woah," she said, her eyes bulging.

"You live here?" he asked.

"I just moved in this week." She sounded distant and lost.

He just stared at her, frozen with fear at what he might say next. He could feel it boiling up like a raging geyser about to blow. "I feel awful about today," he said.

"It's alright," she interjected quickly. "Everyone has bad days."

"I want to make it up to you. Can I take you out to dinner tonight?"

She stared at him for a long time. His heart was pounding against his ribs. He waited breathlessly, counting the seconds somewhere in the back of his mind. He imagined a hundred ways she could politely, gently let him down.

After an agonizing moment of silence, she cracked a weak smile. "Sure," she said, pulling out her phone.

He didn't know what to say. His phone buzzed.

"I just texted you," she said. "Let me know when you'll come by to pick me up." Her weak smile broadened into a full, beautiful smile.

He watched her walk away in awe, then drifted in a daze to his apartment, leaving the milk in the car to spoil.