The letter she will never send

The letter she will never send

Elisa was aware she could never send the letter. It was impossible.

But the memory of Pablo remained vivid in her mind as if it all happened yesterday.

The countryside had a special place in Elisa’s heart. Rivers, forest, the smell of fresh wheat harvest, the aroma of wildflowers, and the scent of ripe fruit took her to a different time, filling her soul with happiness and nostalgia.

          It was summer a long time ago. As city kids, going to the countryside was an adventure for her and her brothers. Her father had a cousin, Aunt Julia, who owned a dairy farm south of the large city where they lived.

        Elisa stayed at the farm for a couple of months. Her Aunt’s place was so much fun. There was always something new to see or do. Watching people working in the fields, feeding animals, or milking cows was always entertaining.

        The farm adjacent to Aunt Julia belonged to her brother. It was there she met him for the first time. 

“Hi, I’m Pablo. Welcome to the neighbourhood! He grinned.

“Hi, neighbour. I’m Elisa,” She said, smiling shily.

Elisa wished he was by her side to reminisce together. That summer, she had turned fifteen a month ago, and Pablo was sixteen. She fondly remembered his enchanting dark eyes, shy smile and friendly disposition.   

After all these years, the memory of his contagious laugh still resonates in Elisa’s heart. She was an introverted girl who loved reading and writing. She wasn’t much into music, fashion or what was happening with movie stars. Going to school and learning made her happy.  By today's standards, Elisa was a nerd.

 But somehow, summertime changed her. She felt happier and free.

One morning, Pablo showed up at the front door. Her heart skipped a beat.

“Hi, there. My Mom is going to make jam, and she needs more fruit. Want to come to help me up?”

“Yeah, it would be fun.” Her face blazed.

 She and her brothers had a blast climbing trees to eat fruit warmed by the sun, swimming in the river or sunbathing without sunscreen. 

Elisa and Pablo became close friends. He showed her his most precious possession, a bay horse called Bayo. The horse was a feral animal. No one could ride it but him. The horse didn’t like to be saddled, so Pablo had to ride him bareback. When he invited Elisa to ride with him, she thought he was out of his mind. Her? A city girl who knew horses just by pictures?

“C’mon, don’t be a chicken.” He said, teasing her. “He is a good horse.”

     Pablo convinced her to ride Bayo together. To get on that horse was a reckless act. When Bayo felt something on his back, he started jumping up and down. But her friend knew how to control the animal, and Bayo was calmer after a few minutes.

 The same thing happened when it was Elisa’s turn to mount the horse. Bayo went wild when he felt her weight on his back. She thought she was going to die, but she didn’t. Elisa grabbed Pablo firmly by his waist, closed her eyes, and prayed.

Every time they mounted Bayo, he backed, but Elisa wasn’t afraid anymore. She had Pablo next to her. 

     It felt incredible riding that horse with him, feeling the wind on her face and hair, 

They became inseparable. They enjoyed walking by the riverside and feeling the cold water caressing their feet. It was under a willow tree by the river when he kissed her for the first time. Elisa had never been kissed before. That innocent kiss woke up in Elisa's heart, feelings new to her. She still recalled the shyness, excitement, and happiness that engulfed her soul. That was the summer she felt like a grown-up.

           The taste of that first kiss had remained on her lips since the day that happened over half a century ago.

      A giant oak tree stood in front of Pablo’s home. Its trunk was old and beautiful. Elisa loved to run a hand over its rough surface. One day, he told her, “I’m giving you this tree,” and carved a heart with their initials on its trunk. What a splendid gift! 

They used to talk for hours, sharing their dreams and projects when they finished high school. Pablo hated going to school but loved farming. He told her they could get married when they were older, have a house in the country, and stay together forever. It was fantastic to build those dreams.

But destiny had other plans. Elisa wanted to go to university; he didn’t. She was a city girl, and he was a country boy. There was no future for them.

    Their romance lasted almost three glorious months, leaving in her heart memories she has always carried with her.

  Elisa and her family returned to the city where they lived. Inexorably, life continued. Several years later, someone told Elisa that Pablo got married and had a child. Unfortunately, his marriage didn’t last long.  

Pablo used to visit her in dreams and still does from time to time. He has not aged, though. She sees him as the same shy boy with a contagious laugh. 

Life has been generous to Elisa. She has a wonderful husband and two grown-up daughters who are her world. But a part of her heart only belongs to Pablo, her first love. There, his memory will remain forever.

Some years later, Elisa visited Aunt Julia. She was old and fragile, but she did remember them riding Bayo. Their oak tree still stands tall and proud, displaying the heart Pablo carved for her.

Elisa went to the riverside, sat under the willow tree, and thought of the summer 

she felt all grown-up a long time ago. Even today, writing these lines, her eyes welled.

She wishes she could send him this letter, but she can’t. His heart decided to stop beating when he was only fifty-two years old.

THE END