Knowing but wishing I didn’t

“We’re sad to say that there’s been another homicide in Cornet county. The woman—“ The news lady, Ruby was interrupted by the abrupt turning off of the television. A man sighed, “That’s a shame.” He put down the television remote and stood up from his recliner chair. “Not something I’d like to hear about.” He went upstairs to his bathroom and started shaving his face for work tomorrow. He nicked his skin, blood oozing out. He thought about the woman who was murdered, which lead to his thoughts of Necrophilia. Not something he’s interested in, just knows too much about. Without another thought, he washed the extra shaving cream and blood off his face. As he was drying his face he looked at his reflection, wondering if he could go back to when he was 7 years old. He stood there pondering if he could forget the look of his twice removed aunts expression on her lifeless body. If only his father had protected him from such a thing instead of exposing him to it. He thought about how his fathers words to him, “Now son, your uncle is a little crazy. What you saw him do to your aunt at the end of the funeral service isn't something we gotta talk about. We’re just gonna move on and not think about it, alright William?” His words filled his head. He threw up in the sink remembering what had happened that day. ”Oh, biscuits! Well ain’t that disgusting?” Will groaned cleaning out the remaining puke in the sink bowl. He changed his clothes and went to bed. Will laid on in his bed, staring at the ceiling. He couldn’t stop thinking about the woman and went onto his phone doing some research. ‘Her name Candace Nicole Herring, her friends called her Candy. She was beloved by her parents and her fiancé. She died last week and before her open casket funeral service, she was missing. They found her body in a closet and her clothes were missing, her body had been vandalized. Candace was a victim of necrophilia.’ He read shuddering at reading those words, feeling sorry for her. He continued to read, ‘They found the murderer who had also stole her body for intimacy in the funeral home closet...’ Reading that he almost threw up again and scrolled down quickly. ‘I loved her, I still love her. My fiancé was cruelly murdered and raped, she had nothing to do with Jake. He stalked her because he thought her body was to be worshipped, he was a freak. She was lesbian for heck sake, and she wanted kids but not like that. I’m pregnant with our child, and our wedding is in a month...’ He turned off his phone, he couldn’t bear to think anymore. He went downstairs and turned on the television, to distract himself. He pulled the blanket off the back of the couch. Will couldn’t bear to think about Candace, Necrophilia, Her fiancé, any of it. He eventually fell asleep to the blaring of the television.