I Said No

!TW! Mentions of drug use, smoking, sexual peer pressure, and rude language !TW!

“Kate, c’mon.”

I stared at the cigarette placed in Michael’s palm. Why had I come?

“Kate, it’s just one cigarette, sometimes you have to risk it all and live a little.” Michael took my hand and made sure I had hold of the cigarette before letting go.

But, I’ll get in trouble. I don’t want to. I took a small breath, staring at the nicotine instrument in my hand. I couldn’t seem to form the word “no.” 

“Here. I’ll light it for you.” Michael took out a toxic green colored lighter and flicked the spark wheel a few times before it ignited. He took my hand and held the ignited lighter to the tip of the cigarette, lighting it. “Try it out.” 

I stared at my trembling hands. I don’t want to. No. I opened my mouth but nothing came out. Michael grabbed my hand gently and directed the base of the cigarette to my mouth. He inserted it in between my cracked lips and told me to suck in. I did and as a did, a burning sensation filled my mouth. 

I quickly spit the nicotine instrument and had a coughing fit whilst smoke billowed out. Michael started to laugh, seeming to find my suffering funny. I tried to take big gulps of air to restart my breathing, but I ended up coughing instead. 

“Oh, Kate. It wasn’t the worst, was it?” Michael said in between laughs. How could he find this funny?

After I caught my breath, I instantly put the cigarette out, crushing it in the ashtray in front of me. I stood brushing ashes off of my pants. “I better go.” 

“You’re leaving already?” Michael sounded genuinely disappointed. 

“My mom said I had to be home by seven.” I lied. 

“Well, it’s only five-thirty. We have plenty of time before you have to leave.” 

“I live on the other side of town, Michael.” I tried to explain calmly.

“Oh, I can drive you.” He said. It didn’t really sound like a suggestion.

I nodded slightly. “Oh, alright..”

There was an awkward silence for a moment. It was so quiet you could hear the broken A/C running. 

“Follow me. I have something I want to show you.” Michael stood from the smoke-smelling couch and took my hand. His hands felt rough with calluses and healing blisters. His skin had a sort of yellow tint to it. He led me down a yellowish hallway that smelled faintly of cigarette smoke and a stronger smell. Is that… tobacco..?

“Tada!” Michael opened a door to what seemed to be his room. I had to refrain from gagging from the strong smell of nicotine. I couldn’t be rude. That was disrespectful. 

“What did you want to show me?” I curled my blonde hair around my pointer finger nervously. I didn’t want to be here. 

“I just got these edibles from this dude in an alleyway over by Kings Street. The one by Hannah’s house. He sold them for a reasonable price. I wanted you to be the first one to try them with me! How cool is that? I never let anyone..”

His voice seemed to fade. Edibles? What were those? Whatever they are I didn’t want them. Why did I come here anyway? I knew it was a bad idea, but I still came. Why?

“Kate? You okay?” Michael’s slightly worried voice interrupted my thoughts. I wanted to say no but all I said was, “Yeah! I’m great, why do you ask?”

“Oh, you seemed a little pale, is all. But you’re welcome to sit on the bed. The floor isn’t the comfiest of places.” Michael headed over to his bed and sat down, patting the side right in front of him. I couldn’t say no. He was being so nice to me. 

“Alright.” I forced a smile and held my breath as I made my way into his room. I sat down on the mattress. I let go of my breath. It smelled awful. Like death itself. 

“Here.” Michael pulled out a small, white square and handed it to me. “Apparently it’s the best stuff he had.” 

I stared at it nervously. I looked back up at Michael and he smiled encouragingly. “I think I’ll pass on this one.”

He seemed disappointed. “What? Why?”

I had to think of a lie fast. “I uh... Eh... If I came home smelling like weed, my mom would kill me.” 

He seemed to relax. “That makes total sense, man, I apologize.” He laughed and took the edible from me and slipped it carefully back into the bag it came from. 

After that, everything seemed to go smoothly. We mostly talked about school projects and jobs. An hour later, he seemed to have moved closer to me all the more. It didn’t seem weird at first. We were just friends and it was normal to be close to friends. But as we talked, his hand gradually made its way to my knee. I shifted into a crisscrossed position. It took him a few minutes to resume his hand position, but this time it slowly slipped up to my thigh. I made a small sound. Get your hand off of me. Now. 

I assume he took this as a sexual sound, as he rubbed my thigh.  Get. Your. Hand. Off. Of. Me. NOW. 

“Kate? Are you okay with this..?” He took my chin in his other hand and leaned in closer. Was he really going to take my first kiss from me? 

I shoved him away and gagged. 

“Kate?” Michael asked in a surprised voice. 

“No..” I shuddered. I hated every single thing about this. I wanted to leave. He didn’t understand. I didn’t like him. 

“What?” I don’t think he heard me. 

“I said no! I don’t like you, Michael. I don’t want to kiss you. I don’t want to have sex with you. I don’t want to be with you. I don’t want to smoke cigarettes. I don’t want to have your damn edibles! I don’t want anything about you! I hate you, I hate your house, I hate your room, I hate everything about you. No, Michael. I said no.”

He stared at me in astonishment and a sly smile slowly crept across his face. “I see what’s going on. You’re frazzled. You don’t understand what’s going on.” He pulled me in close and whispered in my ear. “It’s alright baby girl. I got you.”

What the hell? What did this guy not understand about no?

I pushed him away. “Michael stop.” 

“C’mon baby. Stop playing hard to get.” Michael cooed, grabbing my arm. 

“Michael, let go of me.” I stared right into his cold blue eyes. After he didn’t, I returned the death stare. “Now, Michael.”

He scoffed and let go of my arm. I leaped out of his bed and showed myself out of his room. 

“Just wait until everyone hears how much of a whore you are.” I heard Michael’s angry voice becoming closer. 

I kept walking. I walked into the living room, grabbed my bag, and headed for the door. 

“Kate! Please. Wait, I’m sorry.” Michael skid in front of me. He looked crazy. 

“No, no you’re not Michael. Move.” 

“Kate, baby, we can talk over this. I didn’t mean to be such a douche.” Michael smoothed out my hair. 

I moved out of his reach. “No. Do not touch me.”

“Excuse me?” I could feel his anger rising.

“I said no. Do not touch me. I am not afraid to say no to you anymore.” I shoved past him, opened the door, and left. 

I said no. I thought excitedly as I walked out of the house. I felt free in the fresh, cold air. I felt like I had been captivated by Michael's house, like it didn't want me to leave. I looked back at the house, my backpack slung over my left shoulder. 

I cupped my hands over my mouth and shouted, “Just wait until everyone hears how much of a whore you are!” 

Satisfied, I turned around and started walking home. Just wait until Hannah hears about this.