Paradise Lost

Submitted into Contest #248 in response to: Write a story titled 'Paradise Lost'.... view prompt

26 comments

Contemporary Inspirational Fiction

On a leisurely Sunday excursion through the verdant French countryside of Bellefleur, where emerald fields roll velvety to the touch and unfurl their plush sprawl beneath the azure sky, lies a grand rustic farmhouse that appears plucked from the pages of a whimsical fairytale. Newlyweds Aurelie and Lucas Dubois are desperately looking for their first home, hoping it will be the last. With a mistaken turn down a winding, dusty dirt road, their haphazard path unwinds to a hidden gem where their dreams are destined to take root on fertile land.

To their disbelief, they saw a “For Sale” sign in the front yard, as if someone had staked it just for them.

Aurelie and Lucas exchanged hopeful smiles and a hand squeeze as they pulled into the driveway, their eyes widening in astonishment.

With its rustic whitewashed walls adorned with vibrant climbing ivy and roses, the home exudes a charming ambiance. A small slated path covered in violet creeping thyme and Corsican mint carved its way through the wildflowers, leading them to the warm embrace of the amiable owners, Andre and Annabelle Le Doux, tending to their enchanting cottage garden.

“Bonjour! Bonjour! Bonjour!” Aurelie exclaimed, unable to contain her excitement as she inhaled the divine aroma of roses, lavender, and hyacinth in this garden from which dreams manifest.

“Bienvenue,” Andre and Annabelle chimed in unison, their smiles reflecting the beauty of their beloved garden. Aurelie felt a sense of peace wash over her as she stepped further into the enchanting oasis, grateful for the opportunity to experience such natural beauty.

The sunlight filtered through the canopy of old oak trees, creating speckled shadows on the garden below, while Aurelie spun around, captivated.

“We saw the For Sale sign with a stroke of luck.” Lucas’s eyes sparkled with excitement, matching Aurelie’s enthusiasm.

“Come, let me show you around.” Andre led Aurelie through the intoxicating flowers to the backyard.

A riot of colors burst forth in a breathtaking display, their scents creating a heady perfume. Delicate, silken petals unfurl in hues from deep sapphire to soft blush pink.

Sunflowers stand tall along the garden’s edge. Their golden heads nodded at them in the breeze.

A lush green carpet stretches under cherry, lemon, and apple trees. Busy bees hum as they flit between flowers, collecting pollen. Lavender releases a heady aroma, and rosemary and thyme add savory scents to the fragrant symphony.

Amid the garden's beauty, children's laughter brings life. Aurèlie watched eight rosy-cheeked souls, like playful spirits, darting among the blooms.

Like silver bells, their laughter joins birdsong and rustling leaves, filling the air with joy.

With each step, they leave behind a trail of magic—tiny footprints pressed into the soft earth, like whispers of a secret shared. In their wake, the garden seems to stir with newfound life, as if awakened from a slumber by the sheer force of their spirit.

“This is it, Lucas. We don’t need to look any further. This magical land is the perfect place to raise a large family.” Aurelie gazed at Lucas with tears in her eyes.

“I agree. Let’s get this family started.” Lucas turned to Andre and gave him an affirmative look.

Andre smiled, knowing that this enchanted oasis would be the perfect place for their future children to grow up in.

With the deed’s ink barely dry, the Dubois signed the final paperwork, removed the “For Sale” sign, and secured the keys to their first home, marking a momentous milestone. Lucas scooped Aurelie up, and across the threshold, they stepped into their future, brimming with hopes and dreams of starting a family.

Thus, they christened it “Paradise,” their home, where they would sow the seeds of love in fertile soil.

Aurelie and Lucas spent their summer unpacking and exploring the vast grounds of their new home. Each day seemed to bring a new delightful discovery—from the secret treehouse hidden in the forest to the natural spring creek running through the valley and even a cozy reading nook by the fireplace. Aurelie thought these features were something their future tribe of children would love. Every corner of the property promised a lifetime of little giggles and an abundance of happiness. Memories to last a lifetime.

As they settled into their new life together, they realized that “Paradise” was not just a name but exuded endless possibilities and happiness for the future.

They cherished evenings watching the sunset from their porch swing, imagining their children catching fireflies, roasting smores, and playing tag as they sipped on tart wine harvested from the grapes grown in their orchard. They enjoyed having picnics in the cottage garden and making minor improvements around the house, like adding fresh coats of paint. Aurelie focused on the children’s rooms, dreaming of filling the spaces with smudged fingerprints, scribbled walls, laughter, and precious memories.

As the brisk breezes from the valley shifted, signaling autumn, they snuggled around the fire, watching the leaves swirl into red, orange, and gold hues, creating a picturesque scene that felt like a romance novel. Their favorite part of fall was reaping the resplendent harvest of the Le Douxs’ sown garden, eager to create their own the next spring.

As the days shortened, they savored the last moments of warmth and sunshine, knowing that the cozy fireplace would soon be their primary source of solace. Aurelie and Lucas embraced the changing seasons, looking forward to the muted beauty of winter settling over their new home, knowing it would be the last winter with just the two.

With spring, the skylarks announced the season’s change by ascending into the cyan sky. As the days lengthened and the valley awoke from its peaceful winter slumber, the French countryside turned into a symphony of bird activity, with their beautiful trills echoing across the open expanse. Their aerial acrobatics and merry songs represented the renewal of life and assured warmer days to come.

The most alluring sound was the Nightingale’s song during the twilight hours. Its haunting lullabies lulled Aurelie to sleep, and as they filled the air, they weaved a spell of mystery or foreshadowing that lingered long after the stars had vanished from the sky.

Aurelie and Lucas had been anticipating spring all winter to plant their seeds under the perfect circumstances. They couldn’t wait for the time to arrive when they could get their hands dirty and start planning, planting, fertilizing, and nurturing their garden with hopes of a successful outcome.

After all, it was the very essence of Aurelie's desire to buy the house in the first place.

As a cohesive team, they mapped out their action plan, circling a date on the calendar in red to align with the prime time to plant. They picked the optimal size and location of the area, seeking a spot blessed with adequate sunlight. They tilled the land with unwavering determination, removing impediments and preparing a fertile environment conducive to a flourishing life.

Working together, they planted rows of seedlings, each symbolizing hope for growth and abundance, their hands intertwined in shared determination.

Aurelie and Lucas devoted significant time and care to nurturing their plants. They carefully water each plant, directing every drop of water to the roots for optimal hydration. They fertilize the soil with organic and natural compounds to provide nutrients and use natural pest control methods such as companion planting, crop rotation, and beneficial insects.

Day after day, they nurtured the soil with love, hoping to see it thrive and flourish. Yet, despite their efforts, they faced challenges such as unpredictable weather and pests that threatened their crops. Despite these obstacles, Aurelie and Lucas remained resilient and committed to creating a bountiful harvest. But, as days turned into weeks and weeks into long months with negative results, their hope faded like petals whisked away by a gust of wind. Each wilting rose mirrored the dimming of the once-bright hope of success, a poignant reflection of their struggles.

Determined to solve the problem, Aurelie and Lucas meticulously inspected every inch of their garden, leaving no detail unturned. They introduced new plant species to increase the garden's diversity and experimented with different cultivation techniques to achieve their desired goal.

They awaited the first sprouts to break through the soil, a sign of life and growth that would bring renewed hope to their hearts. Despite their unwavering efforts, the garden remained barren, leaving them shocked and in denial by their failed attempts.

“I wonder if they’re not taking root from poor pollination.” In frustration, Aurelie held her head low and said, “Or, perhaps a genetic issue?”

“It could be from stress, you know,” Lucas said in a low, forthright voice. Did he place them in the soil deep enough? Was the spacing to optimize their chances of successful germination and growth accurate?

Aurelie spent her evenings researching while rocking in the chair passed down to her by her grandmother Laurine. Playing the waiting game, she took up knitting to pass the time. Now, knitted blankets were adorning each bedroom, placed on the cold white sheets of the vacant rooms, waiting to be filled.

Meanwhile, Lucas devoted his days to caring for the garden, nurturing each plant with love, determination, and resolve to witness their robust growth. Each month, they wished upon stars, blew dandelions, and prayed to a God who seemed muted in response to their heartfelt pleas.

One day, Aurelie noticed a sprout emerging from the earth. Elated, they were, but their happiness was short-lived. The next morning, the promising bud wilted away, leaving them disheartened and wondering if their efforts were in vain.


Aurelie felt overwhelmed with inadequacy and unworthiness, blaming herself for the seeds' failure to cultivate. Meanwhile, Lucas took responsibility for the failure and withdrew to avoid a confrontation. This led to misunderstandings and further distance between them. Aurelie found support from two friends, Alise and Annabelle. She met Alise during long, contemplative walks and Annabelle, the previous caretaker who had nurtured the resplendent garden before they moved in. Aurelie found that her new friendships empowered, validated, understood, and encouraged her.


Feeling woeful one evening, Aurelie and Lucas strolled through the garden. The vibrant blues and pinks that once adorned it were now ghostly shades of muted greens and earthy browns, as if the garden were mourning its own loss. The melancholy that now permeated the once lively sanctuary mirrored the gloom in their hearts.

Aurelie’s eyes filled with tears as she traced the withered vines, now covered with a shroud of despair. Now swathed in desperation and desolation, the garden shrugged in silence, telling tales of surrender and defeat. The couple grieved over the loss of their once-envisioned future, not just for the garden but also for the shattered dreams it symbolized.

“Have we been forsaken? Are we unworthy of these blessings?” Aurelie quipped.

“My sweet petunia, our love will guide our path through these trials.” Lucas said, kissing her forehead.

Aurelie and Lucas stood side by side in the desolate landscape, their love for each other undiminished by their failure. Their affinity served as a testament to the sustaining power of their devotion, which would endure and flourish like a resilient flower capable of braving the harshest winters. Despite their lost paradise, they recognized that their love would blossom amid the barren soil of their shared sorrow.

Lucas winked at Aurelie, expressing their shared hopes for the garden’s revival and their relationship’s resilience. “I still hope for a hybrid as beautiful as you.”

Aurelie found comfort in surrendering to the natural course of events and nestled her head in the crook of Lucas’s neck. “We can’t give up hope. It’s been a long year. Perhaps if we stop trying so hard and let nature take its course,” she said.

"I certainly don't mind trying," Lucas said, playfully pinching her bottom, causing Aurelie to giggle. With this flirtatious gesture, they hurried inside to snuggle up and hibernate for the winter.

A lone seedling had taken root the following spring, buried deep within winter’s womb. As the first sunbeams of the new season caressed the earth, a sprout emerged from the depths of their soil. Their love endured the hardships with unwavering patience and boundless hope, ushering in a new chapter of growth and renewal in their lost Paradise, now reclaimed, symbolizing the enduring resilience of their love and dreams.

As time unfurled, a frail and delicate lad emerged, his skin as soft as rose petals. He exuded an air of innocence and purity, unblemished by the world’s complexities.

They blessed the child with the name Briar Thyme Dubois, derived from the Old English word “brer,” meaning “thorny bush.” The name portrayed nature's rugged yet beautiful qualities, reminiscent of wild roses that thrive in natural, untamed settings. Briar conveyed a sense of strength and resilience while conjuring images of delicate blossoms nestled among thorns—a perfect fusion of masculine power and resilience.

The new family of three rocked on the porch, wrapped in a knitted blanket, in awe of the breathtaking sunset that bathed the bountiful estate in a warm glow. They marveled with gratitude over their growing paradise and the deeply emotional and transformative experience they endured. Their unwavering resilience, hope, and unparalleled love for each other began a new chapter filled with hope, joy, and endless memories.

May 01, 2024 04:42

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26 comments

Beverly Goldberg
01:04 May 09, 2024

The imagery is so vivid, changing with the seasons of discontent. Strong writing that so conveys the sadness of waiting for fertility month after month, year after year. Love the description of the new babe. You really can convey meaning through metaphor in astonishing manner. Charming and heartfelt writing.

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E.L. Lallak
02:09 May 09, 2024

Oh my! Thank you so much. That means a lot coming from you:)

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11:26 May 08, 2024

incredible writing style😍

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E.L. Lallak
12:03 May 08, 2024

THANK YOU!:)

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Darvico Ulmeli
22:13 May 03, 2024

Love your story. Beautiful descriptions and fantastic imagery.

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E.L. Lallak
01:13 May 04, 2024

Thanks Darvico:)

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Itisha S
17:16 May 02, 2024

I love your descriptive style of writing! It's the glue of the story.

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E.L. Lallak
00:53 May 03, 2024

Thanks hun!

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Trudy Jas
11:43 May 02, 2024

Wonderful analogy.

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E.L. Lallak
00:54 May 03, 2024

Thank you Trudy:)

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Mary Bendickson
17:43 May 01, 2024

You did not leave a leaf out of your garden description. So beautifully displayed. And the symbolism so superb.

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E.L. Lallak
18:02 May 01, 2024

Thanks, Mary. I always overdo it. HA! Good lord, the editing process is ridiculous, and it's STILL too much.

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Mary Bendickson
18:12 May 01, 2024

It is beautiful! 😍

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10:54 May 01, 2024

A happy ending to Paradise Lost. Loved the way you described the conception, growth and birth of their child in a metaphorical way. I know a couple who bought a new home and olive farm out in the country as their retirement project. Every olive tree in the plantation died. Such a tragedy. The Uni students who had planted all the young trees hadn't released the roots from their plastic wrapping and they died before it was discovered. Soul destroying.

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E.L. Lallak
15:27 May 01, 2024

That is devastating!!!!! You should write a book about that;) What a nonsensical mistake. And their dreams destroyed. Tragic. Tell me there was a happy ending! Thanks for reading. My son and daughter in law struggled with infertility for 5 years and it was heartbreaking watching them go through it. I based a lot of this on their struggles. Life just isn't fair sometimes.

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21:31 May 01, 2024

My daughter is going through the same thing. She was always the girl who loved babies and children. It is heartbreaking. The story about the olive farm had no happy ending. They got some money out of it, but their dreams were shattered.

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E.L. Lallak
21:44 May 01, 2024

Just all around depressing. Not fair:(

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Alexis Araneta
08:25 May 01, 2024

Oh my !!! What a beautiful, colourful (literally) story of love enduring through trials. I loved how you used the garden as a symbol for their trouble to conceive. The imagery in this is just absolutely spot on. Splendid work. Just be careful, though, with some bits where there are typos. FYI, the correct spellings in French are Lucas (Yep, silent S) and Ledoux/ Le Doux (Because "doux" is the masculine form of the adjective for "sweet/soft"). Oh, and pedantry corner that doesn't really matter (LOL ! Sorry !): I'm not sure that Briar Thyme ...

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E.L. Lallak
15:37 May 01, 2024

OH MY GOODNESS!!!! I never thought about misspelling a name in a made-up story!! Obviously, I've never been to France. HA HA!!! This is so educational! What would I do without your amazing CC. So appreciated. At least I have time to quickly change it. HEE! I didn't realize France had mandated laws about naming people. I am kind of flabbergasted. I thought the definition of Briar had perfect symbolism. Ignorance is bliss. You changed your name! FYI my E is for Elizabeth:)

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Alexis Araneta
15:58 May 01, 2024

Hahahaha ! No problem at all. It's just my francophile/francophone self infodumping on a story set in France with French characters. Hahaha ! Yep, actually, most of Europe has laws like that, I believe. In Germany and the Netherlands (??), if a name is not on the list of acceptable names, you can't use it. No androgynous/unisex names either. Yep ! So, now, you know what my real name is. (Well, almost. My first name is something I do not like at all and only my Mum uses. LOL ! Alexis is my middle name.). Hahahaha ! Nice to meet you, Eliza...

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E.L. Lallak
16:13 May 01, 2024

Well my nickname used to be Betsy. Yep like a cow. I hated my name growing up, especially my ancestral middle name Laurine which I used in the story because now I think the name Betsy is adorable and Laurine is gorgeous so much so that I named my daughter, Aura‘s middle name Laurine to keep the tradition rolling. Names are powerful, ey? Now I’m going to head to France’s directory of name laws in hopes Briar made the cut.😆

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Alexis Araneta
16:24 May 01, 2024

Betsy is adorable ! I used to work with a woman from Bordeaux named Lauriane. Lovely name ! They are indeed powerful. I don't even want to mention my first name because it's never felt like me (and my Mum sighs because of that. Hahahaha !) Let's see now about Briar. I don't even know if they've heard of the name, so they may err on "No". Eek !

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E.L. Lallak
17:59 May 01, 2024

Well, now I am curious!!!! About the important stuff, your name. HA! They should have direct messaging on this.

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