Mister X

Author on Reedsy Prompts since May, 2021

Stories (11)

11 Stories

900 karma pts

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“Rape Is Wrong, Right?” by Mister X

Submitted to Contest #233

Trigger Warning - Multiple mentions of rape.“Adam, somehow I knew you’d be here.”“Really? This is supposed to be my secret spot. How did you find me?”“You’re on Life 360, my friend. Your wife always knows where you are. She sent me.”“Ah, that makes sense. Can I order you a drink?”“Sure, I’ll have a Sam Adams.”“I’m sorry buddy, it’s not that kind of bar. How about a ginger ale or coke with light ice?.”“Who are you and what have you done with my friend Adam?”“This is my thinking bar. Alcohol just clouds the mind. I come here when I need to con...

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“Initial Response” by Mister X

Submitted to Contest #195

“Ok, Myron. Let me get this straight. You’ve decided you want to be a superhero…” “I haven’t decided I want to be a superhero, Mortimer. I am a superhero.” “You are?” “Yep. I just found out I came from a planet far, far away. As a result, I have superpowers on my new planet, Earth.” “What kind of superpowers?” “Well, technically I have just a single superpower.” “Do tell.” “I can complete tax forms at superspeed with TurboTax accuracy. I’ve been doing my parents' taxes since I was three, and they’ve never been audited. I...

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“He Said, She Said” by Mister X

Submitted to Contest #192

"Is this where we line up?”“Wee line up? Are you referring to people experiencing short stature?”“No, no. I want to know if this is where we line up. As in us. As in people.”“Yes. Individuals are lining up here for appraisals.”“I can’t wait to see if my old stuff is worth anything.”“You mean your mature stuff.”“No, I didn’t bring anything naughty. Why would I do that?”“I don’t mean mature as in alternative morality. Mature is how people today refer to things that are no longer new.”“Right. Old. No longer new means old.”“We don’t say old anym...

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“An Aye for a Legg and a Legg for an Aye” by Mister X

⭐️ Shortlisted for Contest #183

If Lucky Chances wasn't the worst singles bar in South Florida, it's only because the Board of Health had closed down the others. There were just so many hepatitis cases one county could handle at a time.Woodrow Aye arrived at happy hour promptly at 6:07 p.m., just after clocking out from the big box retailer that kept him gainfully employed, assuming wearing a blue vest and bitching about the Miami sports teams constituted work. After a few spritzes of Drakkar Noir and a drive-thru dinner at BurgerFace, Woodrow walked into Lucky Chance’s da...

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“LGBTQD” by Mister X

Submitted to Contest #174

For the most part, nothing terribly exciting ever happened in the Jackson household.  Larry Jackson was an electrical engineer by trade, but as he worked in a supervisory position, he never really got his hands dirty.  Eileen, his stunningly beautiful wife, was a contented homemaker.  She was a member of the sewing club, the scrapbooking club, and the club club.  The club club was a club that found new clubs for its members to join.  Eileen was the vice president and treasurer of that one.  The three Jackson ...

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“Black and White” by Mister X

Submitted to Contest #141

“Jamaal? Jamaal Black?” the Hispanic receptionist called out, looking over her glasses at a clipboard at the sea of people waiting for court-ordered therapy sessions. A tall white man in his 40’s stood up, dressed in a white polo shirt and light brown khaki pants. His canvas deck shoes squeaked as he cautiously approached her, so as not to alarm her.  “Yo miss,” he said. “I’m Jamaal.” “You making fun of me?” The receptionist looked at the white middle-aged man, straight out of central casting. He couldn’t have been any whiter. ...

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“The Card-iologist” by Mister X

Submitted to Contest #133

"Hiiiii. Welcome to Hallmark Greetings & Gifts. May I help you find something today?" "Well, uh, yes. I'm looking for a Valentine's Day card. For my niece." "Perfect. Our Valentine's day selection is over here.” “Are you sure?” “Am I what?” “Are you sure? I mean, these cards are assorted blues and yellows and greens.” “And?” “I was looking for Valentine’s Day cards. I was expecting a selection of cards in reds and pinks. Maybe some glitter.” “Sir, we are an inclusive card store. I can assure you that blues and yellows and greens can expr...

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“Like Father, Like Son” by Mister X

Submitted to Contest #120

“Back in my day...” The words were barely out of my mouth when, as is common these days, I was rudely interrupted.“Back in your day? Geez Dad, you’re 50 not 500.”“That’s the whole point,” I said, attempting to win back a conversation I should never have lost in the first place. “How, in the space of 30 years did we go from there to here?”“From where to where?”“When I got out of college in 1981, there was one country, two genders, ten commandments and endless possibilities. Now there are just excuses. If this is what progress looks like, then...

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“Joel's Diner” by Mister X

Submitted to Contest #110

CW: abortion On Saturday nights, the diner gets busy just after 9:00 p.m. I don’t mind it. It helps keep my mind off things—things like unopened bills, unanswered texts, unreturned phone calls. “Say Billy, I’m ready to order,” rasps the grizzled old man, raising a finger to get my attention. Typical of Fort Worth, he always wears a cowboy hat and belt buckle the size of a salad plate. I trot over. “Let me guess. You want chicken fried steak, mashed potatoes, no green beans, and extra gravy?” I take the menu from him, a menu he...

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“Descent Into Darkness” by Mister X

Submitted to Contest #109

August 2020How do you define the dark? At its core, it’s the absence of light. If that’s the case, then night similarly would be the absence of day. I work at night. I exist in the dark. As such, I have the time and the quiet to contemplate these things. I’m not sure how I ended up living my life at night, but a few things I am sure about. Silence is loud and darkness is maddening. I used to know the light, I used to embrace the day. Day people seem to live; night people simply exist. September 2020The thing about ni...

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“Welcome to the Neighbor's Hood” by Mister X

Submitted to Contest #94

At the Trump International Hotel Washington, a large group of red-faced men sat their doughy bodies in overstuffed winged chairs, drinking Scotch from crystal tumblers.“What is the matter at hand?” Harrison Jefferson Livingston, III asked, blowing blue plumes of cigar smoke out of the corners of his mouth. He tapped cigar ashes directly onto the Persian rug. “National health care?” replied a voice to his right.There was a brief pause before the group started to chuckle—the chuckles quickly turned into loud guffaws as the joke hit home. ...

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Author bio

It’s satire.

Shortlisted 1 story ⭐️

Contest #183
An Aye for a Legg and a Legg for an Aye – read story