9 comments

Drama

"Stop fiddling, Tanya." "Yes, mom." Today, Tanya was at her mom's place to celebrate her Father's birthday together. And it wasn't a good start already. This house didn't really hold good memories. Thinking, she remembered her eighth birthday :


Tanya yawned, she was a eight year old girl. 'Today is my birthday! She remembered happily, I wonder if mom has a surprise for me!' There was a knock at her door. "Wake up!" her mother's voice was heard. Tanya stepped on her dirty, colorless carpet and unlocked the door. "Good morning, Mummy!" "Help me with the dishes! Your brother is crying! I have to feed him!" 'oh, they didn't remember' Tanya thought disappointingly. Every year, it was the same, they would forget about her birthday and she had NEVER received a birthday present after her grandparents went away . Little Tanya sighed and washed the dishes. "We are going out, wear something presentable, please." Sapphire(Tanya's mom) snapped. Tanya finished washing the dishes and slipped a faded yellow dress over her head. She rushed out and wore her sandals, it was already a few sizes too small...


She jumped into the car and her brother was there sitting in his car seat gurgling happily. When Tanya was young, her grandparents took care of her, she was the apple of their eye, but unfortunately, her grandparents passed away two years ago, and everything changed. She went back to her parents' house and was helping out ever since. The car rumbled and crackled as they pulled out of the driveway. "Where are we going daddy?" "Your brother's boots don't fit anymore, we have to get new ones." Sam (Tanya's father) replied. Tanya looked sadly down at her feet, her toes stuck out of her sandals. "Mommy," Tanya began in a small voice, "Can I have new shoes please?" Her dad turned red. "You ungrateful little child, we gave you a home and clothes and you are still asking for new shoes? Have you had any shame?" he spat. "Sorry, daddy." Tanya said sadly. "Sam, we have to get Tanya new shoes, they don't fit anymore, its very humiliating." Sapphire said. "It'll ruin our reputation." "True." He turned back, "Fine." Tanya smiled and looked happily down at her feet. When they arrived, everything was quite expensive, the only shoes that fit her brother were over a hundred dollars, but her parents bought it anyway. But when it came to her, they found a pair of stinky old sandals that were only two dollars, they bought it. "Are you sure that you want that?" A voice behind them said, "Those are pretty dirty and disgusting, I was planning on throwing them away." But when she saw Tanya, she narrowed her eyes and looked at her brother. Sadness filled her eyes, "I see, you value one child more than the other." She knelt down and put a pair of leather boots in Tanya's hands. "for you." Tanya was speechless, this was the first time someone had given her something after her grandparents passed, her clothes, everything was given to her while they were still alive. "Thank you," she whispered gratefully


Tanya stood up and walked to her old room, everything was gone. She expected it but there wasn't anything valuable to her anyways. She went over to the window and stared out at the familiar view. She had stood their a lot of times when she was lonely or sad. Now she thought "I can't believe that two years ago, I was standing here wondering when I can finally have my own life. Now....."


"Come and help with dinner," Tanya's mom, Sapphire, shouted. "Coming!" Tanya hurried into the kitchen, her mother's shout breaking her thoughts. "Uh, what about Oleander?" Tanya asked. "Isn't he helping?" "Your brother has homework." Sapphire said, avoiding her daughter's eyes. "Leave him to do his work." "It isn't fair." Tanya mumbled under her breath. A few hours later, they finished making the dinner, the table was heaped with delicious food. And Tanya's face was filled with sweat.


"Hey, mom." A voice said behind her. It was her brother, he was standing there with ear pods stuck in his ears and wearing a hoodie. "Mom, I thought you said that he was doing his homework!" Tanya said loudly. "Don't raise your voice to me, young woman, he is just a child, leave him to be." Sapphire said. "Mom!" Oleander yelled. "I can't find my Nintendo switch!" "I think its in the shelf beneath your television, dear." "Oh, hey Tanya." "Hey." Tanya said in a monotone. Sapphire continued to mix the dough for the the cake. "Get along, you two." 'But i thought he shouted at you' Tanya mumbled. "It's not fair."


The door dings and swings open, heavy footsteps were heard. "Son!" "Coming, dad." Oleander shoves his hands into his pockets and shuffles out. "You said you wanted the new video game for your Nintendo Switch didn't you? Here you go son!" Tanya's father, Sam, put something in Oleander's hands. "Thanks, dad." Oleander said. "Tanya!" Sam exclaimed. "Err, hi dad, long time no see." Tanya said awkwardly. Sam smiled, but when Tanya's back was turned, he glared at his wife. Oleander watched silently.


"Do you have a better job?" Sam asked as they sat down to eat. "But my job pays thousands!" "I am planning to retire soon so I don't think thousands would be enough." "What about your retire money?" Sapphire inquired. "It won't be enough to buy my son a sports car when he turns sixteen, would it?" Sam said, clapping Oleander heartily on the back. "I will NOT be changing jobs dad, thousands is more than enough to go." "Didn't I just say I wanted to buy a sports car for my son?" Sam asked angrily. "Yeah you did, get your own money, you're not even sixty years old dad!" Tanya responded. "I seriously have enough of you people, you didn't even remember my birthdays!" "Calm down, young la-" "I have a name! It's always 'young lady do this, do that'! I am out of here!" "I-"


Tanya grabbed her purse and stormed out angrily. When Sapphire made a move to go after her, her husband grabbed her hand. "I want to have my dinner in peace, let her be it." Sam snarled. At listening to this, Oleander couldn't take it anymore, he stood up and said "You two are heartless aren't you? I am going after Tanya." He rushed out, but it was too late, her car was already pulling out. Oleander stood there numbly, finally he whispered "Lo siento hermana"

Sorry sister.



November 27, 2020 04:53

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9 comments

Philip Clayberg
04:00 Dec 28, 2020

Wow. You certainly did a very good job of describing the tangled politics of this family. I wish the story hadn't ended sadly, but at least Tanya stood up for herself, when it seemed like no one else in the family would stand up for her (though Oleander finally did). As someone once said, "You can choose your friends, but you can't choose your family." I can empathize with Tanya. I didn't exactly grow up in a happy family myself (and it still isn't what I would exactly call happy). Some possible problems (hope you don't mind): Have yo...

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Amanda Kelly
16:36 Dec 14, 2020

Hello!! This was a really nice story! I agree with Katie W. that it would've been a lot easier to read if the dialouge was separated a little better. But otherwise, great story!

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18:54 Dec 07, 2020

Just a random comment on your name, lol: YESSSS I LOVEEE A:TLA

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13:36 Dec 07, 2020

Ahhh what a sad and touching story, Ying tung!! I felt really connected to Tanya, which is sometimes really hard to do in writing (creating characters that your readers will love, I mean:)) A few critiques: -maybe if you made a new line every time someone spoke it would make it easier to read. It's kind if hard to explain, but something like this: "Do you have a better job?" Sam asked as they sat down to eat. "But my job pays thousands!" "I am planning to retire soon so I don't think thousands would be enough." "What about your ret...

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Neppi A
10:14 Dec 04, 2020

Quite a sad story. Poor Tanya. Good job buddy!

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Magdalene Lam
12:59 Dec 06, 2020

Thankyou for you compliments. Can you add a word on how to improve my story?

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Sad and delightful story at the same time! (Is your name Hailey? Sorry for the werid question)

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Magdalene Lam
01:11 Dec 01, 2020

Nope, my name isn't Hailey. Thanks

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Oh. Sorry! I just thought the person in your profile was Hailey. D:

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