Unique Hero

Submitted into Contest #48 in response to: Write about someone who has a superpower.... view prompt

26 comments

Fantasy

Davy is the youngest of six siblings, who grew up as a sickly child so his mother took care of him until the day she died unexpectedly.  Instead of his siblings stepping up to take care of him they ignored him out of jealousy.  It didn’t matter that he would have died without her constant help.  They felt ignored and it was all his fault.

With his father being a workaholic to provide for the family, and to help with his grief, the children were left with the chores.  Chores which Davy was given the worse.  Did he complain?  No, for he was doing his part to help the family survive.  Even though he was the smallest of his three brothers and two sisters, he was given the toughest tasks.  All was well for Davy for it gave him a challenge, and it made him stronger.

“How can you show love toward ones who despise you?” one of his few friends asked him.

“They are my siblings,” he replied.  “They are my flesh and blood.  You say they are being mean, but what they are doing is making me stronger.  I might not have the physical appearance of one of strength, but there are other ways.  Strength of mind.  Strength of soul.”

“Whatever,” his friend said.  “I think you are a fool, and setting yourself up to always be under one’s heel.”

That was his final day with his friend because he wanted to be around ones who uplifted instead of degrading him.  There was enough of that at home.

Soon, Davy started working late at night, cleaning charter buses for a small company.  Bring in a little bit of money to help with the family.  He kept a small percentage while the rest went toward bills, food, clothes, and other needs.  Someone had to step in since his other siblings either had no job or kept the money to themselves to blow on things that were no help to the family.

It was at this job that Davy started to have unusual experiences that at first he ignored, but as it persisted he wondered if there was more to it.

“Would my family or friends think I am crazy by telling them I see what looks like a shadow of a figure floating around me?” he pondered.

For a long time he kept it to himself, not wanting to bother anyone with his crazy ordeal.

“My imagination at work in the dark.  In the quietness of night.”

The few times he had free time from chores and work he would go to the river to hangout.  To watch the rushing water go by was so soothing to him.  Lay back on the grass, hearing the water, and looking up at the sky felt like heaven.  The beauty of his surroundings put a smile on his face.

“Can I join you?” a gentle voice asked one day as he sat by the bank.

Davy looked back, seeing an older gentleman with a peer white mustache with handlebars, standing there with a warm smile.

“Feel free,” he responded.

The man came over and sat down beside him.

“My name is Mark,” he said as they shook hands.

“Davy.”

“Glad to meet you on this beautiful day,” Mark said.  “Such a wonderful scene to behold.”

“Yes indeed.  The reason why I spend so much time here.”

Mark chuckled as he took a small rock and chucked it into the river.

“I like to tell you that you have a gift,” Mark said to him.

“Thank you,” said Davy, looking at the man, who had a serious look.  “I heard we all have gifts.”

“You have a gift that needs to be used for now on,” Mark stated.

“What do you mean?” asked Davy looking at Mark with a questioning look.

“You have a good heart,” explained Mark.  “In a fallen world you have a pure soul.  With your gift you shall vanquish the enemy.”

“Huh?” is all Davy could say as he scooted from Mark.

He had thoughts of King Arthur.  Thoughts of many heroes, but he wasn’t one.  Just one to survive life, trying his best to be a positive in society.

“You are about to see what your gift can do,” said Mark.  “You will see the cause of so much anguish that takes place in this world.  You will be a help to your fellow humanity.  A gift that no other person has ever experienced.”

“What is this gift?”

“You will find out tonight,” replied Mark, standing up.  “You will do wonders.”

Davy wanted to ask so much, but knew Mark was done as he started to walk away.

“Take care,” Mark called back.  “And to know that all need your help.  Not just a select few.  I know you are a good choice.”

Davy went home, figuring he would get a couple of hours sleep before work.  As he walked down the hallway to his bedroom his oldest brother, Tim called out to him.  He turned around and didn’t hear a thing his brother said for he saw a shadow by his right shoulder.  Then it swooped over to his left shoulder.  Davy didn’t hear a word as the shadow seemed to devour his brother.  His features seemed to get uglier as he spoke louder to Davy.  Davy turned around and rushed into his room.

“This shadow scenario seems to have enhanced,” he muttered as he lay down, but no sleep came his way.

He went to work that night, quite nervous of what was coming his way.  The work began, and hour after hour ticked by with nothing out of the normal happening.  He was nearing the end of his shift when the shadows came.  Before they just floated above him but on this occasion they were quite erratic.  To most they would have cried out and hurried home, but Davy stuck around, and grew quite annoyed.  Reminded him of flies or mosquitoes buzzing around him.

“That is enough!” he called out, raising his hand toward one of the shadows.

A beam of light shot out of his hand and struck the shadow.  Davy could hear the shriek as the shadow dissipated into nothingness.  The other shadows quickly disappeared.

Davy looked at his head in shock then looked around, seeing nothing in sight.

“Is this my gift?” he asked himself.

Davy finished up, and went home.  It took some time to calm down, and go to sleep.

The next day, he got up, and after cleaning up and having some breakfast he went out to do his regular chores.

He wasn’t long into his tasks when his older brother, Tim came hurrying toward him with an angry look on his face.

“What did I tell you?!” he called out.

“Tell me what?” Davy asked.

“I told you to have the bad apples cleaned up from the front yard by this time!” demanded Tim.  “It’s still full of apples!”

Davy was about to apologize when the shadow appeared from behind Tim.  without a second thought Davy raised his hand, and a second later a beam shot out and struck the shadow.  The shadow quickly dissipated, and Tim abruptly stopped.  He looked around disoriented before he fixed his gaze on Davy.

“Why do you have your hand stretched toward me?” he asked.

“Nothing,” Davy replied quickly, putting his arm down.

“Okay,” Tim said, scratching his head.  “I guess just get back to work.”

Tim turned around and walked off.

Time went by, and Davy used his gift on many people, some of them over and over.  He realized people didn’t completely change to the good since we all have free will, but the shadows were enticing them.  They were trying to push and pull people down the wrong path.  Not as long as Davy was around.

No one knows Davy is a hero.  It mattered not for him.  He is just glad to help anyone.

June 29, 2020 00:23

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26 comments

Sarah Freeman
20:42 Jul 26, 2020

This story is really good! I like that Davy doesn’t care about the popularity that comes with being a superhero. He just wants to help people. This mysterious Mark persona is enticing. Davy’s past is sad but interesting, getting readers to sympathize with him. Who else is the runt of the family yet gets treated like it’s their fault? It’s so saddening that readers really want to slap Davy’s brothers across the face, which is good. Generating anger towards injustice is crucial to get readers rooting for the hero, and I think I can safely say ...

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Corey Melin
20:57 Jul 26, 2020

Greatly appreciate the feedback, which there was a lot of. It tells me how indepth a reader goes into the story which I give you many thanks!

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Courtney Stuart
21:31 Jul 07, 2020

ahh this story was so wholesome! i especially loved davy and the whole concept of having a hero without acknowledgement. great job! :)

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J. Ernst
19:28 Jul 07, 2020

I enjoyed your story. It left me wanting to read more. If you get a chance please read my 1 st submission "the Gift"- J Ernst

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Corey Melin
20:15 Jul 07, 2020

Thank you for the comments. If I get a slow moment at work I will gladly read your story.

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Ananya Bhalla
15:09 Jul 07, 2020

Just a suggestion, but hearing what the shadows do to coerce people, like voice insecurities and essentially heighten their fear/anger, would’ve helped develop the idea of these shadows as our own personal demons. Overall, the story was unique, meaningful, and enjoyable.

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Corey Melin
20:14 Jul 07, 2020

Greatly appreciate the feedback. I figured that being vague on the shadows will leave the readers pondering what their purpose is on humanity. Maybe it was too vague.

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Ananya Bhalla
11:22 Jul 08, 2020

No, it was perfect. I wasn’t sure what exactly the shadows did to humans, and jumped to the conclusion that they brought out hatred and anger through words. The shadows might have done so by showing images, sounds, or something else. The vagueness allows interpretation, so if that’s what you were going for, then no worries.

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KAUSTABH KASHYAP
07:08 Jul 07, 2020

Your superhero's anonymity is really uplifting. And I like how you keep things real instead of going for an easy happy ending. Please keep writing.

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Corey Melin
20:12 Jul 07, 2020

Greatly appreciate the feedback!

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Yageen Faiz
14:48 Jul 06, 2020

hello! can you read one of my stories if you have time? thank you!

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Zan Lexus
02:42 Jul 05, 2020

He's a silent hero. :) Great story and unique idea. ^_^

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Corey Melin
17:42 Jul 05, 2020

Much appreciated!

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Reena B.
01:21 Jul 04, 2020

A truly warm and touching story! I enjoyed the concept of the shadows, and Davy is such a wholesome hero. If you'd like to check out my story, that would be amazing! Good luck with your writing!

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Corey Melin
02:48 Jul 04, 2020

Thank you and will check out your story.

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05:21 Jul 01, 2020

That is a very touching story.

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Corey Melin
05:50 Jul 01, 2020

Thank you!

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Deborah Angevin
10:10 Jun 30, 2020

Hi Corey, I really love Davy's character! Enjoyed reading this story thoroughly :). Would you mind checking my recent story out too? Thank you! :)

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Dobby's Sock
05:34 Jun 30, 2020

Wow, this one has such potential that just a couple of extra revisions would have made it stand out really well and I say this to suggest how good the work over it is.

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Corey Melin
05:49 Jun 30, 2020

Much appreciated. In my time constraints its sometimes a rush to read it later and say, "It could be so much better or tweaked some". Take care

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Batool Hussain
16:59 Jun 29, 2020

I loved this new story, Corey:)

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R L Brewer
13:55 Jul 14, 2020

That was great. I like Davy.

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Corey Melin
16:55 Jul 14, 2020

Thank you for the feedback

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14:10 Jun 29, 2020

This was a great story; I loved it! I really liked the idea that you have about the 'bad' in us is these shadows trying to take us down the wrong path. Your story has such a clear message, and I love Davy's character! Keep writing and stay safe! :) -Brooke

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Corey Melin
16:10 Jun 29, 2020

Thank you so much. I figure the shadows can be interpreted whatever way someone wants to. Our own sins or demons or whatever negative in our lives. You keep on writing and stay safe yourself.

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18:54 Jun 29, 2020

You're welcome!

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