A mother's story

Submitted into Contest #47 in response to: Suitcase in hand, you head to the station.... view prompt



Everyone was busy walking fast carrying bags in their hands, but you were not walking. You were sitting on the bench with a suitcase at platform number 10. Because that's what the message said so.

Your eyes were busy with noticing everyone, and you were fidgeting your fingers nervously.

A drop of sweat was forming on your forehead, and your heartbeat was beating fast.

The sound of your fingers tapping on the case was going unheard. The five million dollars inside your suitcase was gone unseen.

No one noticed you, but you noticed everybody.

You once again checked your watch for the nth time and sighed heavily.


You placed your suitcase on your lap and held it tightly. You brought your other hand to take your phone from the front pocket of your coat.

Your face was plastered with a sad smile when you saw your lock screen.

You daughter Lily's picture. She was sipping her thumb finger in her sleep. You found it cute and snapped the picture to treasure it. 

"Mommy will get you baby." You whispered and kissed the phone screen with tears starting to form in your eyes.

Everything was going well for the past several years. You were happily living with your daughter, who was going to turn six soon. You wanted to get her a birthday present, and so you worked overtime to fulfill her wish of getting a bike.

You got caught up in the work, and you forgot to pay attention to her. It felt like everything was happening so fast.

Morning you wished her good morning and had breakfast while chitchatting with her. And as usual, you dropped her in school and proceeded to your work.

But never did you expect something would have happened to your child.

Morning she was with you giggling, and evening you received a call with her beautiful voice crying on the other end.

You were dumbstruck and was numb to understand what had happened.

You felt like everything around you was moving slow. The voice on the other line was with no doubt, it was Lily. 

But how did it happened?

She was fine in the morning, but in the evening she was not with you.

You came to the realization when you felt another voice speaking to you.

"I am sure you know why I kidnapped your daughter. Your life of precious angel is five million dollars. Don't try to outsmart me and I won't hesitate to kill her if cops are involved. Tomorrow at 10 a.m, come with a suitcase to the station and wait at platform 10."

And all you heard was a beeping sound indicating the call got disconnected.

But you couldn't put down the receiver, neither you could process your brain.

All you could hear was the cries on the line. You blinked two times and put the receiver down with your trembling hands.

You looked around your surroundings, and wondered who would try to hurt you, your daughter, your family?

And ask for five million dollars?

Working in a bank brought you decent pay and peaceful life for your daughter. 

You didn't have such a large sum in your house, neither in your account. But you do know where you can get it.

Customer's account.

You know it was against your ethics, morals, and principles, whatever they say. But nothing was visible to you, except your daughter's face.

You stayed in the bank like working overnight, and sneaked into the locker room when you found your co-workers were heading to their houses.

Being a manager gave you the authority to hold keys to the lockers. You opened the locker of the top customer, in your bank. Your eyes widened by seeing the sight in front of you.

You were sure that it had more than five million, but you didn't need all. You counted the money thrice and collected the money with the dark brown suitcase. 

You know it was wrong to take other's money, but you had no choice.

You couldn't sleep the whole night thinking about possible situations.

What if they take the money and don't give Lily back?

What if they tortured Lily?

Did Lily eat something, did she took her medicine?

Your mind was filled with "what if's" thoughts and soon the next day arrived.

You checked once again and locked your suitcase with the key. You breathed out heavily and walked to the station to get your daughter back.

And that brought you here sitting on the bench waiting for the person to call you again.

The sudden sound of your ringing phone made you jump a little on the seat. 

You knew who it was. 

Without wasting a second you attended the call and all you heard was Lily crying in pain.

"You idiot. I told you not to go to cops and you did. You will pay for this." Before you could reply to him, your mobile and suitcase were snatched away, from you making you gasp.

You didn't know what was happening.

You never went to the cops, but now they were dragging you against your will.

You screamed for help and tried to justify your innocence, but they weren't paying attention to your reasons.

You informed them about your daughter's disappearance. But, no one listened. No one helped you, but they were watching. 

"You are under arrest for stealing bank customer's money. You have a chance to speak with your lawyer, or you have the choice to remain silent."

You wished it was all dream. 

You cried and begged for help to rescue your daughter who was in the wrong hands.

But nothing helped.

You had no choice but to take the gun from the cop and threatened to pull the trigger.

You saw how all the cops surrounded you with several weapons and telling you to drop the gun.

But you didn't listen.

They didn't then why should you?

You wanted your daughter and wanted her to be safe in your arms without any injuries and bruises.

You saw a cop stepping in front of you to take the gun away. 

Without delaying you shot him on the chest.

You didn't miss how he stumbled by falling on the ground, and how the other cops pointed their guns at you.

"I want my daughter back." You screamed like there was no tomorrow.

You jolted up in your bed by sweating and panting a lot.

You looked at the surroundings and sighed deeply.

This had been the billionth time you have dreamt about this.

It's been ten years since you did that little stunt in the police station.

It's been ten years since you lost your precious daughter.

Cops found the dead body outside your house when they were searching. No one saved her, no one saved you.

You were put behind the bars for shooting armed officers.

But nothing happened to the people who kidnapped and killed your daughter.

You wondered why.

The customer got his money back. But you didn't get back what you desired.

Life was cruel to you, wasn't it?

Whom can you blame?

The cops? The kidnappers? The lack of money? The society?

You asked yourself, "Why me out of everybody?"

June 20, 2020 10:18

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Nandan Prasad
13:56 Jul 01, 2020

Brilliant story with a brilliant ending! Really drew me in, and the second person is also written so well. Also, would you mind checking out my story if it's not too much trouble? Thanks and good luck!


Saranglogy R
03:06 Jul 02, 2020

Thank you. And I would be happy to read yours :)


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B.T Beauregard
16:27 Jun 30, 2020

Wow..Great story, such an interesting spin on the prompt. The concept is outstanding, the only things I noticed were a couple of grammatical errors but they didn’t take away from the story. I also think changing the dream part to present tense could help it flow better. Overall, fantastic story!!


Saranglogy R
02:55 Jul 01, 2020

Thank you for your feedback. And I am working on my Grammar skills and will improve it in the course of writing.


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Mehak Aneja
06:22 Jun 29, 2020

Brilliant!! Literally loved your story. Very nicely written. Would you mind reading my story and giving it a like and sharing your opinions on it?? :D


Saranglogy R
08:08 Jun 29, 2020

Thank you and I will be glad to read yours :)


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13:12 Jun 20, 2020

Captivating story! Kudos!!


Saranglogy R
02:33 Jun 21, 2020

Thank you :)


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