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 Dear diary

Miara is doing it again, I open my eyes to see her staring blankly at the ceiling. Trying to ignore her I get up and go to the bathroom. I love my sister but this is the 3rd night I have woken up from  my sleep to see her just lying there spaced out. She kinda freaks me out. How am I supposed to know what to expect? Maybe she wants to kill me or something. Those are the questions I literally ask myself before turning over on her every night. As I dry my hands I crack the door slightly to see if I can hear  any sudden movements. Our room is down the hall but that doesn't stop me from trying to hear sounds. I creep slowly down the hall praying she went to sleep and it's just me over exaggerating as usual nope she is still looking at that ceiling. I walk over to my bed and sit there in silence staring at my socks, afraid to say anything. I know you think I'm crazy Maira says and at times I feel that way it's just every night around this time my brain won't let me get any sleep. Everything I did today is playing in my head constantly, afraid I missed something. I look at her with a confused expression on my face unsure of what to say, sorry if I spooked you out she tells me, yes you did I answer in my head not wanting to tell her that. Instead I asked her if she wanted to sleep with me with no hesitation she answered no I'll be ok. The girl really has a sleeping problem, trying to help got me nowhere. I'm not about to let her keep me up all night so I'm turning over. Well tomorrow is a different day goodnight sweet dreams. I bet you thought this  was it well so did I shortly following a 10 min nap I'm awoken by baby sobbing sounds. I try to ignore It I really do, all of Maira's sleepless nights are causing me sleepless nights that is no fun for anyone. Groggily I turn over to look at my sister cursing in my head because I know the only way for me to get sleep anytime soon is to try to get her to sleep. When I tell you my insides were screaming and my eyes were burning, believe what I say. I look at the clock on our dresser and the time says 2:00 this can not be my life right now all I want to do is get some rest that thought made me have some compassion for how she must be feeling. Pushing all the negative thoughts away from my brain I get up and walk over to her bed. Scoot over she does as I say soon I'm there looking at the baby blue ceiling with her. So I'm racking my brain to start a conversation, anything to get her to talk. maybe it will make her sleepy and then I can go to sleep. When I tell you I was coming up with empty thoughts would have been an understatement. Taking a deep breath I ask her do you want to talk about it?If not I  can just continue to lay here. Looking at me like I have just asked her a dumb question she says yes maybe talking will help I no you don't want to do this so I appreciate you for doing this Maira says. Shaking my head I embraced the conversation she was telling me about her last couple of days and how she got to this point. It started 3 days ago when she forgot to study for her Math exam. She went to school like she does everyday and got to class thinking they were going to be taking notes when it hit her like a ton of bricks that she forgot to study for her exam. Now Maira is a good student, her grades are good, her attendance is on point so for her to forget was a big upset to her heart. She looked at me with tears in her eyes. That's when the sleepless nights started I was fine before that. So the problem started because you forgot about an exam you had rite? Let's work from there. Maybe you having a job and also trying to make the time for basketball practice is overwhelming your putting too much on your plate at once. You're always trying to do everything that just maybe it could have slipped your mind you having been coming home so tired you don't even eat anymore you just get in the shower in fall asleep. Jessica you're onto something she says I honestly have been exhausted trying to work, practice and keep up my school work has completely worn me out. You should see me smiling like I have just won the lottery or figured out the piece to a never ending puzzle. Maira is looking at me now with teary eyes so I'm like why are you looking at me like that, she has the nerve to say I didn't think you cared so much even though I know it's only because I was keeping you woke I still want to thank you for talking to me now maybe we both can actually get some sleep. That sounds like music to my ears I say so I get up and head over to my own comfy bed. O how I've missed the comfort of my own bed even if I was only out of it for an hour. I look over to see Maira have finally gone to sleep thank GOD my eyelids couldn't last another hour. My hand is also tired from writing this much so on that note I'm going to bed until tomorrow we're we shall meet again for another recap of my boring life xoxo.


April 04, 2020 18:14

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