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Sad Fantasy

I added one more mark to the ever growing images of lines on the wall. Seven hundred days, that’s how long I had to stay here. That’s how long it would be before I saw the sunlight again.

I wasn’t one of the lucky ones who had a cell with a window. The only view I got was the dark walls of my jail cell and the interior walls of the prison. Every once in a while I got a glimpse of light when the guards brought a new prisoner in, or took one out. But it was mostly just the same old moss-covered brick walls and cracked cement floor.

One large light hung from the ceiling in the middle of the jail that did little to illuminate the cells. The first few nights here had been torture. I hated the dark. All kinds of hideous creatures came out in the dark. Beasts with fangs, claws, and a hunger for death. At least being in jail meant I was safe from those kinds of monsters.

Meals were delivered twice a day, when they remembered. I learned early on to save a little food each day, just in case the guards didn’t feel like feeding us. Even when they did feed us, it was never enough. My stomach constantly grumbled for more food, but I had little to give it.

I counted each mark on the wall three hundred and seventy-five. Halfway through with my stay in this rotten place. A mouse scampered across the floor, making me shriek. You would think after all this time, I would be used to the mice and rats, but I still found myself squealing every time one of the small four legged creatures raced across my cell.

It was hard to keep track of the days when you lived in a place where you couldn’t see the sun or moon. I was warned to make a mark on the wall every day. If I missed one, the count would start all over again. Apparently, the wall was magical, and when your time was up, it would open the door automatically so you could leave. It was a good set up as long as you didn’t miss making a mark.

Thankfully I had made friends with one of the lucky prisoners who had a view of the outside. He would stick his arm through the bars and wave when darkness came. As far as I know, none of the other prisoners knew what we are doing. The guards either don’t know or don’t care, it’s hard to tell with that bunch.

An arm waved through the cell directly across from mine, and I made another mark on the wall. Every mark meant one day closer to leaving. I waved back to thank him. A jail cell door slid open, and the voice of a man crying with joy drifted to my ears. Someone was getting out.

An older man in his late forties hobbled past my cell. His clothes were tattered and torn, faded and paper-thin as they hung from his skeleton of a body. It made me wonder how long the poor man had been here.

The large wooden door that separated us from the rest of the world swung open, and a guard pulled the man through to the other side. I frowned as I thought about how they always knew when someone was at the door waiting. Maybe there was a bell that dinged when a jail cell door opened.

I shook the image of the old man and the door from my mind. Best not to think about freedom. I still had a long way to go before I could achieve it. I studied the wall, counting my marks. Four hundred thirty. I was getting closer.

The guards had skipped giving us our meals yesterday, which was unusual. They never missed giving us both meals in one day. Good thing I had saved that piece of stale bread from my meal yesterday. It wasn’t much, but something was better than nothing.

I choked down the last of my bread and swallowed the last gulp of my water. I hoped tomorrow the guards would bring us at least one meal. My clothes no longer fit, I had lost so much weight. Hunger constantly gnawed at my stomach, and I wondered if I would ever be full again.

A waving arm from across the large room had me rushing to make my white mark on the black wall. Five hundred and ninety-seven. I did some quick math in my head. Only one hundred and three days left to go. Joy filled my heart for just a moment. I could almost taste my freedom.

What joy it would be to feel the warm sun on my face again or to see the stars shining in a clear night sky. I shivered with anticipation. I wonder if anyone will be waiting for me on the other side of that door. My mother, or father maybe. Or even my brother Jeffery. Even though we didn’t agree on much and argued more than we got along, I still missed him.

I sank down into the squished worn-out pallet that was meant as a bed and pulled the ratty blanket up to my chin. Would my family even recognize me after all this time? I fell asleep that night with horrid dreams filling my mind.

As I lie on my pallet, I watched in horror as the guards stormed in through the one wooden door and forced open a jail cell door with a silver key. What little food I had in my stomach almost came up as they dragged the dead body of an older man out of a cell and through the door that led to freedom.

A tear slid down my cheek as I thought about how his family would never see him again. After all this time here, did he even have a family out there to miss him? The wave from the prisoner brought me no joy tonight as I made my mark. Six hundred and ninety-five. I was almost there.

Fear knotted itself inside me, making it impossible to get excited about my upcoming release. I spent the next few days lying on my pallet and watching the mice scamper around looking for crumbs.

On the last day of my imprisonment, I stared at the wall and counted, then recounted the marks. Six hundred ninety-nine. Tonight was the night the metal cell door would slide open, and I would walk through the wooden door to freedom, to the sun.

I paced the small area waiting for that arm to wave at me from across the large area. When finally it did, I could hardly bring myself to strike the last white mark. My hand shook as I placed the chalk on the wall. Then with a deep breath, I confidently flicked my wrist down and smiled as the comforting white mark appeared.

I stepped back from the wall and turned to face the metal door. Nothing happened. My smile faltered as I spun back around to face the wall. Only one mark stood out against the black wall. All the other white lines were gone!

Dropping to my knees, I wailed like a baby. How could this have happened? What did I do wrong?

A guard appeared at my door, startling me out of my self-pity. “You have cheated and used the help of another inmate. For that, the prison is punishing you with seven hundred more days.” He spun on his heels and left.

I buried my head in my hands and sobbed. Seven hundred more days felt like an eternity.

December 27, 2020 04:24

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