Not A Bad Man

Submitted into Contest #252 in response to: Start your story with a character being followed. ... view prompt

21 comments

Fiction Drama

“Oh, for the love of…” Selina muttered the curse under her breath, biting off the profanity at the end with gritted teeth, aware of the little ears flapping on the other side of the bathroom door.

“Mama!” the snot-faced, adorable terror that controlled her life hollered loudly enough that the neighbours would likely call 911.

“Mama needs to pee. Give me a minute.” Ha! As if a two-year-old understood the concept of time or personal space. From the moment he toddled his first steps—actually, from the moment he could crawl—Jasper had followed Selina everywhere. There was no privacy left for her to do the important things, like peeing, and God forbid if she wanted to put makeup on. “I’ll be right out, buddy!”

The door handle trembled and twisted back and forth. Shit, when had he gotten so tall? She watched in dread as the handle turned, sitting there, unable to move, her knickers around her ankles. Tear streaked blue eyes peered around the door as it swung open.

“Mama!” Such delighted surprise filled that one word.

“Mama’s here buddy, let me pee, ok? Go watch Bluey.”

The diversion tactic did not deflect Jasper. He slammed the door open, and tumbled into the bathroom, his wide eyes watching Selina’s every move. She sighed, resigned to an audience as she finished her business, washed her hands, then scooped up her son, covering him with kisses all the way back to the living room, where she curled up with him on the ratty old lounge in front of the small TV screen. It was playing a cartoon about an animated blue-heeler who wrestled with child sized problems. With her face buried in Jasper’s blond curls, so soft and smelling of his unique baby scent, Selina wished for her own problems to be child-sized. Unfortunately, her problems came in the six-foot variety.

Leaving Jasper’s father had been both the hardest and easiest decision. She could not imagine a life with him in it anymore, but she was struggling to make a life without him. After all, James was a good man. She wouldn’t have married him otherwise. He was just a sick man, a man who had traded his family for the bottom of a bottle. It didn’t make him bad, it just made him unreliable and unstable. When it had been just the two of them, it wasn’t so noticeable. They were a pretty independent couple who didn’t rely on the other for anything. Once Jasper was born, things changed.

The TV show captured Jasper’s total attention, mesmerising him with the bright colours and playful music. Selina disengaged herself carefully and padded into the kitchen of their one-bedroom flat to prepare dinner. She felt like Old Mother Hubbard as she scanned the bare shelves and nearly empty fridge. It wasn’t pay day for another two days. The meager pension she received didn’t make it through the fortnight. Luckily, she was fond of instant noodles and Jasper liked chicken nuggets and frozen peas. As she stepped back to close the freezer, she gasped and nearly tripped.

“Bloody hell!” The exclamation slipped from her lips as she juggled the open packet of frozen nuggets, desperately trying to prevent them from spilling on the floor while twisting and sidestepping to avoid crushing her son. How had he snuckup on her without a sound?

“Mama?”

“Go watch Bluey while I get your dinner ready.”

He’d become extra clingy since she’d left James, and she wondered how much of the altercation his little eyes had seen, and more importantly, how much he remembered?

Before she could place nuggets into the air fryer, there was a knock at the door, and her stomach dropped. Knocks at the door were not good things, especially at this time of night. With a deep, steadying breath, she braced herself for what she would find on the other side.

“Hi Selina.”

James!

It was funny how a heart could stop and leap into adrenaline fueled overdrive at the same time. She should never have opened the door without checking the peephole, and she berated herself mentally for her mistake.

“You need to leave. Now.” She hoped her voice was steady and firm, with the kind of confidence she wanted the whole world to believe she had.

“Honey, we need to talk.”

“Don’t ‘honey’ me. We’ve got nothing to say. Just go.”

“Please, just listen. I’ve changed, I’m getting help. But I can’t do it without you.”

“Dada!” Jasper was right behind her again. She tried to prevent the boy from escaping the room, but he wriggled past, straight into James’s waiting arms.

“Hey buddy, did you miss me?”

Selina groaned in defeat. Yes, she missed him. Yes, Jasper missed him. The bruises had faded, the physical scars had healed, yet the emotional ones were still bleeding. Every word, every memory, every wish upon a star, pulled the scabs right off.

“James, you are breaching the AVO. You need to leave.”

“I need to talk to you. I’m working on it Selina, I’m becoming a better man. You know I’ve got those seven steps..”

“Twelve,” Selina corrected him quietly.

“What?”

“There are twelve steps to recovery.”

He waved her correction away with a negligent shrug. “Whatever. I’m here to tell you that I’m sorry, to fix this, to bring our family back together.” He tickled Jasper under his chin and the baby chortled.

“You’re violating the AVO. I need you to leave. You can contact me through the lawyer.”

“Selina, babe…” he reached for her and she flinched.

“Don’t…”

“You don’t have to live here. Come home. This is no place to raise a child.”

“No.”

“I won’t hurt you, I promise. I will never hurt you again.”

“I’ve heard it too many times. I don’t believe you.”

“Selina, you’re my wife. I need you with me.” His tone was cajoling as he pleaded, “I can’t do it without you.”

“Then you won’t do it at all. I can’t be what you need. Go home, get help, and leave us alone.” With determination, she reached for Jasper, who disobligingly clung to his father’s neck.

“Hey buddy, you want to go get ice-cream?”

“No! James, it’s dinner, then bedtime.”

“Ice-cream, ice-cream, ice-cream!” Jasper chanted with excitement, bouncing up and down in James’s arms.

With horror, Selina watched as her ex turned away, her son in his arms. She was torn. Follow? Call the police? Scream for help?

“Jasper, don’t leave me!” she cried.

“Mama!” The little boy looked over his father’s shoulder and his face crumpled. “Mama!” He wriggled frantically, desperate to be set down, but James kept walking towards the stairwell.

“James, stop!” She rushed after him, clinging to his shoulder, trying to drag him back. He flung his arm out and she felt herself propelled, off balance, and falling. Her scream was echoed by Jasper’s cry, but she didn’t hear it as her head connected with the brick wall.

Nothing.


****


“Ma’am, can you hear me?”

The world was blurry, like swimming through treacle. She could feel her heart hammering in her head, so she knew she was alive, but her heart was in the wrong spot, and she seemed to be floating.

“Jasper?” She fought through the fog to ask the one question that was of utmost importance. “Where..?”

“Ma’am, do you know where you are?” She opened her eyes and the blurry face of a stranger peered down at her.

“I’m… I’m…?” Where was she? The stairs? “I fell down the stairs?”

“Yes, we’re going to transport you to the hospital just to check things out.”

“Where’s Jasper?”

“He’s here.” That was James’s voice, and she tried to turn her head, but there was something preventing her. A neck brace? “I’m so sorry, Selina. You fell. It was an accident.”

She ignored him and looked into the face of the paramedic, praying he’d believe her. “I have an AVO. He’s not supposed to be here.”

Unable to see, she was not sure what happened, but voices were raised as she was loaded onto a gurney to be taken to the waiting ambulance.

“I’m sorry! Selina I’m sorry, it was an accident! It wasn’t my fault!” James shouted, his voice urgent and desperate for understanding. She closed her eyes. No, it wasn’t his fault. She should never have opened the door. He wasn’t a bad man. He was a man caught by an addiction to alcohol. A man who was a stranger, one who frightened her because she couldn’t trust him anymore.

“Mama!” They placed her little man in the ambulance with her, safe and sound, and she kissed him with relief, thanking God that this time, she was the only one that James hurt.


May 27, 2024 14:02

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21 comments

13:42 Jun 06, 2024

Hi Michelle, really powerful story, and painful... but well written, able to pass to the reader the fear Selina is feeling. Very good flow. Liked it. Well done :)

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Michelle Oliver
14:56 Jun 06, 2024

Thanks for reading. It’s not an easy subject but I’m happy hat the emotions came through l

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Beverly Goldberg
20:41 Jun 02, 2024

The last line was so painful--"this time." It evokes all the fear and the knowledge that it's not over yet, the unflinching view of future danger. Wow! The flow of the story is terrific.

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Michelle Oliver
01:13 Jun 03, 2024

Thanks Beverly. I wrote and rewrote that last line many times, trying to get it to say so much, so I’m glad it worked for you.

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Devon Cano
21:12 Jun 01, 2024

A hard read because of the subject matter, but very well-written! Hoping that Jasper and Selina can find their happiness in the future and James can actually get the help he needs.

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Michelle Oliver
00:24 Jun 02, 2024

Hard to write too, it’s not easy to write it authentically.

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Kim Olson
15:16 Jun 01, 2024

I also enjoyed the flow of your story. You really drew the reader in. Great job!

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Michelle Oliver
00:22 Jun 02, 2024

Thanks for reading it.

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Martin Maynard
01:49 May 31, 2024

This is such a beautifully written piece. Any time a story elicits emotions, it is well received. When a story can elicit so many emotions at once, it is even better. This story has fear, fatigue, want, need, confusion, anger, love, and most importantly for me, sympathy. I can feel your exhaustion! Such a wonderful story.

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Michelle Oliver
03:37 May 31, 2024

Thanks for reading. I appreciate the comments. Because it’s such a sensitive and serious subject I really wanted to ensure that it felt genuine.

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Daniel R. Hayes
01:00 May 29, 2024

Hi Michelle! This was a very well written story. I certainly think it's worthy of entering the contest. The dialogue was lively and fresh and the descriptions were vivid. I could see this play out in my mind like a movie. It had a great flow and fit the prompt perfectly. Well done! :)

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Michelle Oliver
09:41 May 29, 2024

Thanks for reading, it’s a tough subject and I am glad for the extra eyes over it to ensure it reads well, hits the mark, without being too much.

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Daniel R. Hayes
16:26 May 29, 2024

You're welcome! I know the subject matter was tough to write, but you did it very well. I say enter the contest. I wish you good luck :)

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Carol Stewart
18:47 May 28, 2024

Sadly, a common scenario. Well written, and perfect final line.

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Michelle Oliver
22:34 May 28, 2024

Thanks for reading. Yes, sadly, it’s so common.

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Mary Bendickson
06:50 May 28, 2024

Hope he is successful getting the help he needs. Hope she will be okay. Glad the medic believed her.

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Michelle Oliver
07:16 May 28, 2024

Thanks for reading. Addiction is horrible for all parties.

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Trudy Jas
23:51 May 27, 2024

You write the difficult in such a smooth way. Compelling to read. Painful to live.

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Michelle Oliver
01:12 May 28, 2024

Thanks for reading. Yes, it’s difficult all round.

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Alexis Araneta
17:42 May 27, 2024

Frightening !!! I love how your stalking went from innocent (Jasper) to sinister (James). Great flow to this too. Splendid stuff !

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Michelle Oliver
23:19 May 27, 2024

Thanks Alexis. I had thought to try to squeeze in every prompt this week. I think I might have managed four out of five. It’s a very sad tale when addiction is added to a relationship. I had hoped the innocent to sinister connection would come through and am glad it worked.

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