The Grim Feline

For the last five days this stray cat had stared at me from the top of a fence post in the alleyway behind my house. The alley had very tall trees on the other side of the fence that blocked the view of the woods, on the opposite of my fence. This cat appeared out of nowhere and I have never seen a cat like him before. It didn't feel normal, nor did the cat appear like an ordinary everyday feline. He was larger than a house cat and his fur was almost jet black, minus the small patch of gray on his left ear and a small spot towards the end of his nose. It was his eyes that made me nervous. His eyes were very thinly outlined with the same gray fur as his patch, and his irises were a golden yellow. He just stared in a way that made me feel exposed.

The first day he appeared, he just followed my every move as I was grilling my dinner. There was still sun in the sky, and a nice spring breeze that cooled the air. At first, I thought he must be a starving stray who found my home due to the barbeque smoke wafting up into the air mixing with the sweet scent of spring. It had a delicious smell. I offered a tiny morsel of uncooked steak, but the stray did not move. I thought maybe he wasn't feral enough for raw meat and instead preferred a cooked piece. I decided to give him a cooled off chunk of steak and waited for him to gratefully eat it. Nothing. Just stared right at me. I then tried to ignore it. I finished taking off the potatoes and veggies, and the last of the meat, and headed inside. 

I haven’t made a meal like that for myself in a long time. I had hoped a hearty, grilled steak would help me sleep better that night. My body was screaming at me to do something. 

After dinner I went back out to ensure the grill's fire had gone out and scrubbed off some of the grill's excessive gunk with a vinegar and water mixture. I noticed the cat still there and again he was just staring at me. I began feeling a little uneasy by that point. I went back inside to get ready for bed. Hoping for a good night’s sleep. The food should have been delicious, but it wasn’t. It wasn’t burned, and it was seasoned in the very way I generally had done in the past, to which I love, yet it did nothing for me.

You know that feeling of being watched? I felt it every second of the day for the last four days, since that evening the cat had appeared. It wasn’t enough that I have been having a few rough months with work stress and ex-marital problems. I had felt a heavy weight bearing down on my whole body. My eyes have been like lead. I needed some good ole fashion sleep. With the lack of sleep and the stress I have been dealing with I must be paranoid in regards to this cat’s stares making me as uneasy as he is. I cannot shake this feeling that something dreadful is going to happen soon. What is with this cat?

Yesterday, I spoke to it trying to shoo it away. He was still on the fence line across from mine. It felt like he understood what I wanted but he refused to budge. He looked somewhat amused, like he was mocking me. I grabbed a stick nearby and flung it towards him. He never budged, and somehow the stick didn’t land anywhere near him. I know I am exhausted and don’t have much energy, but I don’t have a bad arm. I grabbed a few more sticks, threw them, and still nothing. I then decided I was going to call animal control in the morning and have him removed. I yelled at it, and smirkingly walked back inside; my thoughts were, I will let the professionals handle him. This thought did grant me a little relief. However, I still struggled to sleep.

 ~~~~ Present Day ~~~~

It's after breakfast, and I am walking to the kitchen window. I look out the window that faces the back of the house, and it is gone. Where did he run off too? The eerie cat's piercing black eyes that seemed to see right through me, exposing me of who I really am, is nowhere to be found. Should I be relieved? Should I be worried for him? Why do I care if he has moved on? These thoughts loom in my mind as I get ready for work. 

I'm pulling out of my driveway and see, from the corner of my eye, past my side yard to the back alley, a flickering light that is dissipating with a sparkle. Strange, I think to myself. I decide to pull over and walk to the spot that caught my eye. For some reason I feel drawn to that area. I sense a cold chill in the air and the hairs on my skin start to stand up as I get closer. What sensation is this? The large close-knit trees in the area darken the alley to where the morning sunrise cannot touch it for a few hours. As I come upon the spot where I saw the sparkling light. I see nothing out of the ordinary. Was the sunlight playing tricks on me? Hmm. Maybe? 

I am sure I saw what I believe I saw.  

“Meow”.

The cat is there eyeing me with those same dark piercing black eyes, and his irises glow in the shadows of the trees that loom above. No, it isn’t a light trick that is making them glow. They have their own inner lighting. I can’t blink, I just stare at him lost in a trance. After a brief pause the cat slowly moves towards a little opening in the fence line, that was almost all but hidden, he stops, looks at me, and then disappears through the tiny opening. I am taken out of the trance, but feel the need to follow him. I look at my fence line and to my house beyond it, I say a good-bye like I am not going to return.

I turn back to the little opening. As I gripped the edges of the greenery surrounding it I feel a sensation that I have never felt before. A release of the world's problems. I feel good. I feel joy. There is a peace unlike anything I have ever experienced.  Finally I feel…