I Need You

I lean on Will as he continues writing his report. I lean in closer to figure out what report it is. It seems to be about our most recent case.

“All work and no play makes for a dull boy, William~”

He gives me a look, “I’d have less work if you did your own reports, Kevin.”

I smile and gently push myself off him, “Why would I that when you can do that better? And quicker. I’m the fighter and you’re the pencil pusher…” I smile and poke his cheek, “…and we’re both human, so we need to eat.”

Will glances at his wristwatch and frowns. It’s late.

“There’s a twenty-four-hour buffet nearby,” He looks hesitant and opens his mouth to speak, “Fixed prices. Only the drinks are charged.”

He taps his finger on the desk a few times, “…fine. After I finish your report.”

I nod and pull a random book from his bookshelf. A fairytale? Will isn’t the one for fairytales…or fiction in general. I take the book a plop myself on the sofa in the room and start reading. The fairytale tells the story of a knight who is faced with a dilemma: to fight one more fight and probably die or to retire— trust their comrades and leave the fight to them— and live a peaceful life. As I’m reading, I watch as Will sets aside some papers and grab another. I put the book on the bed and hop up.

“I’m hungry,” I lament, “You said we’d eat after you finished my report—” He opens his mouth, “And you finished it.”

“Can’t you go there by yourself?”

“Can’t you remember to eat by yourself?”

He gives me an exasperated look and sighs. He begrudgingly pushes himself up and walks towards the door. I follow with a smile. Despite having gone to this buffet multiple times, Will still gets lost and turns left when he should turn right. I give him a small tug in the right direction to correct him. We arrive at the buffet and I follow Will to make sure he gets enough protein and vegetables. After making sure Will is getting enough nutrients, I go over to the dessert section. As I choose, Will grabs my wrist.

“You need to eat actual food first.”

I ignore my urge to protest and give in, following Will as he drags to me our tables. We sit down and start eating. After a minute, I can’t bear the sound of silence. 

“What’s the plan for tomorrow?”

“…” Will stops eating and gives his food a sorrowful look.

I raise an eyebrow and feel my head tilt a little to the side.

“…you should retire.”

Ah, there it is. I can’t help but sigh, “That’s—”

“You’re dying.”

“That’s a bit of an exaggeration— and aren’t we all?”

Will’s grip tightens, “You could die—”

“So could everyone else,” I point out. 

“That’s…you know what I mean.”

A tense silence falls among us. I do know what he means. Last time I fought, I lost consciousness for two days…my body is becoming like cracked glass, needing just the right hit to make it shatter into thousands of unrepairable pieces. The price of my past sins, I suppose. Retiring is a possible, but unlikely option. I could run away and live to old age, but…I look at Will, who’s still staring at his probably now cold food. The world is a horrible place and, humanity at least, is long past its expiration date…but, I think, it’s still worth fighting for. For him. Even if life is meaningless, he—

“— worth fighting for.”

Will’s head snaps up, “What?”

“The world. It’s worth fighting for. It’s the right thing to do,” He doesn’t respond to this and, after a few seconds of silence, I gesture to his food, “Enough with this depressing nonsense. The food’s getting cold and you’re skinny enough as is. Honestly Will,” I playfully shake my head, “You work far too much! You really ought to take care of yourself more!”

He groans as he pinches the bridge of his nose, “Then you should do your own work—”

“Nope. Plus, your penmanship— I like your penmanship.”

“Also, pot kettle!” Eh? “You say I’m skinny? Look at you! You look unhealthily skinny! You’re so skinny that Alex and Rose have started to get concerned about your health! Rose!”

I scoff, “I could easily beat them in a fight gravely injured and—”

“You could, but you still look like you’re at death’s door,” He places some of his food on my plate, “You should take better care of yourself, you know.”

I chuckle and we resume eating. I let Will’s annoyance calm down for a bit before speaking with a Cheshire grin, “But I have you to take care of me.”

He starts choking and I chuckle.

“Don’t worry, don’t worry. I’ll take care of you too— after all, if I don’t make sure you’ll eat, who will?”

“I’m perfectly capable of—”

“If it weren’t for me, you’d never stop working and would’ve already collapsed by now.”

He scowls because he knows I’m right. Our banter continues as we eat, changing to a more light-hearted tone. While talking, I couldn’t help but notice how skinny he looks. Maybe I’m biased since I have muscle, but…his wrists look like skin and bone. His cheeks look a bit sunken rather than healthy. He doesn’t have to learn how to fight, but…a little bit more fat on him would probably do him some good. Maybe I should convince Robin to start making me food throughout the day and give half to Will. It’s not like he’ll remember to do anything other than work and basic hygiene without me. Suddenly, I remember the book. 

“You got fiction.”

“Eh?”

“Your bookshelf. It has fiction books on it now. I picked one at random while you were doing my report and it was a fairytale.”

“Ah—”

“I think it’s good. Non-fiction is fine and all, but it’s also good to have some fiction every now and then.”

“I…uh…I bought it for you.”

I blink and look at Will, who suddenly became interested in the floor, “For…me?”

“Y-Yes. You often loiter in my room and I know you can’t stand boredom and like fairytales and fairytale-like stories, so…I bought some.”

I feel a gentle smile spread across my face, “Thank you.”

He clears his throat, mumbles something and starts eating his dessert. We eventually finish up and go back. I accompany him to his room, telling him that he better go to bed rather than go back to work. 

“Says the insomniac.”

“Not sleeping because of insomnia and everything waking you up and not sleeping because you’re a workaholic who doesn’t know when to stop are two different things. Anyway, go to sleep. Good night!”

As I turn to walk to my room, I feel my sleeve being tugged. I turn back to Will who is once again looking at the floor. I watch him open his mouth before closing it again. He starts chewing the inside of his lip. He starts to let go of my sleeve before gripping it again, strong this time. He opens his mouth, initially full of determination before hesitating again. 

“Don’t let your life go to waste. Keep on living until the end and don’t…please…please…”

I give a soft smile and ruffle his hair. I won’t promise him that I’ll live to a ripe old age since I can’t promise him that, but…I grab and squeeze his hand. 

“I don’t plan on dying anytime soon. After all, if I die, who's going to remind you to take care of yourself!” 

I wish I could tell you that I don’t plan on dying before you because, deep down, part of me needs you…but I’m aware of the circumstances and even I’m not that cruel.