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Fiction Funny Christmas

“What did you get?” Helena screamed to her best friend, Michael.

“Will you let me open it up first? Is it me or do you hear peeping sounds in this box?” Michael asked, ripping the ribbon off of the box his aunt, Susie gave him.

“No, I hear something. Hurry up!” Helena said, almost doing a happy dance.

Helena had received a warm scarf that Aunt Susie knitted for her and she loved it. Her favorite colors were weaved into the scarf, blue, green and red. 

“Oh, Good Grief!” Michael yelled as he opened the box.

“What?” Helena asked walking over towards Michael trying to get a glimpse inside of the box.

“It’s a BIRD!” Michael said, squinted his green eyes.

“A what?” Helena said peering into the box.

“You heard me. A bird! A blue and white and green bird with feathers. The kind that fly's.” Michael said in disbelief.

“Did you want a bird?” 

“Helena, you know me right? Does it look like I want a bird or any other kind of non human friend?” 

“Well, I was just asking. Don’t get your boxers in a bunch. It is just a bird not a bomb or something.” Helena said taking the bird out of the box and putting it on her finger.

“Ah, you are a cute little birdie.” Helena said to the bird.

“You think he is cute? You can have him.” 

“Michael, I don’t want him. Aunt Susie gave him to you. He or she is your gift. It’s a sweet bird.”

“I don’t know anything about birds. Let alone how to take care of one. I can't even keep a goldfish alive and now I have to take care of a bird.”  Michael grimaced at the thought of him trying to take care of a bird.

“You can learn. Helena said, still looking at the bird.

“Do you have a cage?” Helena continued.

“Why would I have a cage for a bird I didn’t know I was getting?” 

“Look, Michael, there’s another box. I bet that is the cage.”  Helena said, grabbing a bigger box from under the tree.

“Here hold him.” Helena said, trying to give Michael the bird.

“I don’t want it.” Michael said turning away.

“Just take him. I am going to get the box and open it.”

Michael held out his finger for the bird and Helena gave him the bird and reached for the package.

“Look, here’s the cage.” Helena said after she opened the package.

“How do we get him in the cage?” Michael said, looking confused.

“OK, Michael, it is not rocket science. All you have to do is open the cage and put her in.”

“How do you know it is her?”

“I am just guessing. Besides she is too pretty to be him.” Helena said gently, taking the bird and putting it in the cage.

“Now what?” Michael asked.

“Now what? What are you talking about?”

“Well, she is in the cage. Do we need to feed her or something?” 

“I would guess that we do. She’s a living thing and probably needs to eat.” Helena laughed.

“Well, what kind of food?” 

“I would say bird food.” Helena laughed harder.

“I know that, Helena, I am talking about what kind of bird food? Do different birds eat different foods? You know like there are tons of different brands of dog and cat food is it the same for birds? I know nothing about birds and can’t figure out why anyone would give me a bird for a gift. They have to be nuts to think that I can take care of a bird.” Michael said, shaking his head.

“Calm down. It’s a bird, Michael. I am sure between the both of us we can figure out what the bird needs.”

“Why is she chirping? Is she hungry?” Michael asked, looking at the bird.

“I think that most birds chirp or make some kind of noise. I think it is normal. But, we probably should put some bird food in the cage for her and probably water too.” Helena suggested.

“What kind of bird is she? Does she need that kind of food?” 

“Michael, look there’s a note inside the box where the cage was. I didn’t see it before. Perhaps you should read it and that might answer some of your questions.”

Michael picked up the note and unfolded it and began to read it.

“Michael Dear, I know that you are probably looking at this little beauty bird that I have gifted you for Christmas and wondering what the hell? You are probably thinking that old Aunt Susie has gone completely mad giving you of all people a bird. Especially when you couldn’t even keep a goldfish alive. Well, I have a confession about that goldfish. Your brother overfeed your fish, Henry, when you went away to summer camp and that is probably the reason he passed away. I am sorry for that. But, now you are still probably wondering what that has to do with this bird. Well, nothing actually. This bird is special to me. I got it when I started chemo last year. That bird kept me company during my darkest days. I don't know what I would have done with my fantastic bird. Well, Michael, my cancer has returned and all the doctors said that old Aunt Susie doesn’t have many more days on Mother Earth to live. My cancer has spread and I am doing everything that I want to do before my time comes. That is one reason I am in Hawaii right now. I always wanted to travel to Hawaii and Paris so that’s what I am doing. I am living. Now, you probably figured out now the reason I gave you the bird. Steffy is her name, yes, she is a girl. I am sure Helena probably figured that out by now. Steffy is very precious to me and I thought long and hard about who would take care of her if something happened to me. As you know, I never had any children but you and Helena are like my children. I have loved you and her since the day you both were born and had the honor of watching you grow up to the loving adults that both of you are now. I wish I could be here to see your kids and grand kids but that is not in the stars for me.  So, I am giving you Steffy. Stefffy has become a part of me. She is like my baby, She is a parakeet if you haven’t figured that out. She eats seeds, otherwise known as bird food. (don’t laugh Helena). I have enclosed a small bag in another box under the tree in a red box and also a gift card to a local pet store to buy more. The gift card should keep her fed for about 6 months. I figure that is enough time for you to figure out how to take care of her and when to feed her and all the other good stuff which comes along with being a bird parent. I hope that you will love her as much as I did and when you look at her you think of me. I love you very much. Oh, and Steffy likes you to sing to her before you cover her up at night to go to sleep. Yes, you will have to cover her up too. She likes the color green. (go figure) So, I will end here and I hope to see you really soon. Take care and take care of Steffy. Be kind to each other. 

Love, 

Aunt Susie”

That was beautiful.” Helena said, wiping away tears.

“Wait, there's a note in there for you too.” Michael said, passing Helena a note.

“I wonder what it says?” Helena said opening the note

Helena read the note and started laughing hysterically. 

“Well, read it yourself.” Helena said, handing the note to Michael.

“Helena, please help Michael with Steffy and don’t let him be a bird brain. Love Aunt Susie. P.S. I hope you like the scarf.” 

“Oh that is really funny.” Michael laughed.

“Well, Aunt Susie sure knows you well.” Helena continued still laughing.

“That is true. Now, I think it is time to feed Steffy.”

“And don’t forget to sing to her, Michael, that’s what Aunt Steffy said.”

“What kind of music do you think that birds like?” Michael asked while getting the bag of birdseed open.

“I don’t know. Maybe that song, “Bye, Bye Birdie.” Helena said laughing so hard she thought she would wet her pants at any second.

“You got jokes.” Michael responded.

“I do. Now, let’s feed Steffy and pick a song you little bird brain.” 

“Helena, I don’t know what to do with you. “

Just then Steffy chipped out her own song.

December 20, 2020 17:53

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3 comments

Graham Kinross
09:12 Sep 12, 2022

Your dialogue is excellent. You need to work the description between it though. I know what is being said but not what’s happening through the end. The description is fine but they’re separate. If you weave them together then it’ll be great.

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Jenn O'neil
16:32 Dec 31, 2020

I really like the energy of the dialogue between Helena and Michael. I could see what their facial expressions would be, and the tone of their voices. I also like how even though Aunt Susie wasn't physically there, she became a full-fledged character through her letter. Having them read the letter was a good way to include a bit of background info without the author having to tell us straight out.

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Marcia H.
00:43 Feb 14, 2021

I am glad that you liked it.

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