Don’t Leave Me!

“I HATE YOU!”

The words were still ringing in the air even as everything around them came to a complete halt. The only sound was the deep breaths coming from the offending mouth. They were just three words. Only three and yet they were like a bullet. A bullet that pierced the strings of their already tattered relationship. Only three words yet they were full of meaning. The implication of the words were tremendous. A tension filled the room weighing heavily on the hearts of all who heard those three words. A sign to all what their relationship had become. Now everyone knew that they were not okay. That they were falling apart. All because of three words. Three words that would forever haunt Benjamin. Three words that ended what they had been clinging to forever.  

To an outsider they had seemed fine when they had entered the party with Grace on Benjamin’s arm. They had worn bright smiles and polite manners, but if one would have looked closer they would have seen the tightness of those smiles. The stiffness of their manners. One could have assumed that these things were just stress, yet if one was to look closer even still they would have seen that Grace was not talking to Benjamin. Their smiles and laughter were fake and as the night went on Grace moved further and further away from Benjamin. Ignoring him completely, and when Benjamin went to ask her if they were ready to go home his wife ignored him. The tension that they had been hiding had appeared. Grace had immediately leaned over to her friends to complain about Benjamin, and Benjamin had snapped.  

“Will you stop being stupid and petty,” He had groaned as his wife had continued to just complain about him to her friends. She did not realize how everyone shifted uncomfortably. However Benjamin did and he snapped at her, “Grace your being so selfish right now!”

Grace had stopped then and stood to face him, “Oh, I’m selfish,” She had snapped back, “I’M SELFISH. I’M NOT THE ONE WHO LIKES THEIR WORK MORE THAN THEIR WIFE!”

More people had stopped to see what was happening. There had been faces of worry and fear. Benjamin had set his jaw, “I WORK SO MUCH SO YOU CAN HAVE EVERYTHING YOU WANT!”

“NO YOU WORK FOR YOURSELF. YOU WORK SO THAT YOU CAN FEEL PROUD AND ACCOMPLISHED! YOU NEVER GIVE ME ANYTHING I WANT!”

“YOU ALWAYS ASK FOR THINGS THAT ARE TOO EXPENSIVE!”

By now most of the occupants of the party had stopped and were now watching the scene that had unfolded before them. Faces of disbelief had watched as insult after insult had been thrown back and forth.  

“WHY CAN’T YOU JUST GRANT ME AT LEAST ONE OF MY REQUESTS,” Grace had shouted.

“I DO! I DO ALMOST EVERYTHING YOU ASK ME!” Benjamin had shouted back.

“YOU DON’T!!” Grace had screamed.

“I DO!” Benjamin had yelled before his voice lost some of the heat, “I do.”

Grace had just scoffed and had brushed past him to walk out. The audience had parted for her as Benjamin turned to follow her.

“WHY DON”T YOU EVER DO ANYTHING FOR ME!”

Grace had paused and turned to look at him, her face full of anger, “YOU ARE JUST SO UNAPPRECIATIVE!” 

She had turned back to leave when it had happened. When Benjamin with fury rushing through his blood had shouted those three dreaded words, “I HATE YOU!”

As their friends and family stared in bewilderment and horror. Grace turned tears falling down her face. Hurt blazing in her eyes as she spoke in an icy voice, “What did you say.”

The rage and the anger that had previously been flowing through his veins turned to ice. His mind raced as he realized the implications of his three little words. His eyes welling with tears he reached for her, “Grace liste...”

“NO!” He drew his hand back, “It’s too late for that. We’re through. Don’t come near me ever again.” Grace turned then and fled the room.  The room that was now completely silent save for the sobs coming from Benjamin’s mouth.  

Their friends seemed unsure of what to do. Frozen in silence and fear. Benjamin and Grace had been the perfect couple. They had been so in love, and now they had fallen. They were shattered and broken. The string that had held them was gone. Grace was full of icy anger and rage, but there was a deep sadness. They had known each other for five years, and now she was alone. Alone in an apartment that they had shared. An apartment that they had made so many happy memories in. Memories that no longer brought her joy. She felt empty. Their argument was full of emptiness. She knew the words were meaningless. No, the argument was so much more than their words.  

If one was to ask what made them break apart, their friends would have said that they hated each other. That they both felt that the other was selfish, but it was so much deeper than that. Grace thought of the argument constantly in the weeks that followed. When she sat at the table alone. When she went out to find a job. When she was with friends. Her words echoed in her head, 

“NO YOU WORK FOR YOURSELF. YOU WORK SO THAT YOU CAN FEEL PROUD AND ACCOMPLISHED! YOU NEVER GIVE ME ANYTHING I WANT!”

She remembered accusing him of working for himself. She had accused him of never giving her anything, but they were empty words, they held no truth. Instead she heard different words. She could see she was screaming, screaming for him to let her go. She had been screaming because she was falling and he could no longer hold her up. It had nothing to do with him not doing things for her. They were empty words. Words that covered the truth.

In the days that followed, Benjamin struggled to comprehend when it had all fallen apart. How he had not been enough. He felt as if he was ice. Frozen and numb. Unable to comprehend how this had happened. He was stuck. Drowning in a sea of pain and sadness, and he didn’t know the way. He was lost. How was he not enough. He could hear her yelling, but he knew what she had really told him. When he moved into his new apartment he felt the argument echoing in his head.  

“I WORK SO MUCH SO YOU CAN HAVE EVERYTHING YOU WANT!”

He saw it was deeper than work. Then working to give her everything. He knew what he really was trying to say. The words haunted him as he hung out with friends. Of no longer being enough for her. Him begging to understand why he wasn’t and Grace telling him they had fallen. He tried to do everything for their failing relationship. He felt the pain when he went to the grocery store. He had tried to understand.  He heard her accusing them of changing once they got married, that they were no longer compatible. His words and hers haunted him. He heard her refusing to try and fix this. They were through. When he couldn’t sleep at night because he was cold and alone he thought of his words.  

“I HATE YOU!”

Those three words resounded in his head as he laid there. He knew they were just words. He knew that Grace knew that too. He knew what he had meant when he had said them. He thought of those words and their meaning wherever he went. He felt alone and those three little words haunted him. They were just three little words, but they meant a lot. They meant more than just their outer meaning. Those three little words echoed throughout his mind when he signed the divorce agreement. They screamed in his head their real meaning,

“Don’t leave me!”